It's that time of year again.......
Happy 4th


About 2 weeks ago, I was looking around the Web for the BIGGEST sky
rocket that I could get shipped to me via common freight carrier. I
located a fireworks importer in Wisconsin who had this mondo sky
rocket--biggest thing I had ever seen--called a SkyDragon. These things
are 48 inches tall and are mounted on a 1/2-inch wooden dowel. Pure
aerospace engineering.

I plopped down a bunch of money and had him send me two cases of these
things. They arrived at the freight dock a few days ago and I had to
drive the van over to pick them up. Two boxes each 2 feet by 2 feet by 4
feet in size containing 80 rockets each. The 'Class 4 Explosives'
sticker on the side of each box was a real bonus. I am gonna have to save
them for the scrapbook.

That night, me and the kiddos had a gen-u-ine rocket launch ceremony. I
placed one of these beauties in a liter-size glass bottle and the bottle
fell over. Hmmmm- this thing was waaay too big. I looked around the shop
for a pipe to set it in, but realized that the only dirt I could drive the
pipe into was in plain sight of my neighbor's house. I knew he was a cool
guy, but I didn't want him to call the cops. You see- 'projectile-type'
fireworks are totally illegal in this county. I was surprised that the
Buncombe County Sheriff Department wasn't waiting for me at the loading
dock when I picked these things up. Anyhow, I finally rigged a launch pad
by prying up one of the driveway drain grates with a crowbar and sitting
the stick into the deep pit. Looked sorta like an ICBM silo with its
hardened lid slid aside.

I asked which of my three kids wanted to light the fuse, but all took a
few steps back and politely declined. Chicken****s. Kids just aren't
made the same nowadays. They fulfill their danger quotient by shooting
bad guys in video games. About as far from real danger as you can get, if
you ask me.

I told the little weenies to stand back as I bent to light the device
with a Bic lighter.

The lady at the fireworks importer promised me that these things would
NOT make any noise. I told her that they HAD to be relatively quiet so I
could shoot them off in my neighborhood without causing 'undue alarm'. She
said I wouldn't have any problem. I emphasized the particular legal
problems I would have if there were any type of loud report at apogee. I
emphasized the fact that I lived right next to a National Park and that
any type of firework that was discharged or assumed to be discharged on
that property would get me sent before a FEDERAL judge right before I got
sent to the COUNTY judge. She again assured me I would have no problem.

That lying bitch.

That rocket engine had a burn time about as long as any I had EVER seen,
and the ascent echoed off the surrounding trees. Diamond shock pattern
extended from the back end. It kept going and going and going. When it
hit apogee at about 1000 feet, the rocket disintegrated into a huge
shower of silent red sparks. Pretty cool, I thought......until the shower
of sparks burned out and suddenly transformed into a cloud of extremely
bright and loud explosions. The kids scrambled into the back door 'Three
Stooges' style (ie: where all three try to get through the same closed
door at once) and left me standing in the smoking haze waiting for the
cops to arrive. The dogs that live along our street were all barking their
heads off at the apparition they had just witnessed in the night sky

That ended the fireworks test for the night.

The next day, my oldest son Doug and I decided we were gonna 'neuter' one
of the rockets so it wouldn't make any noise. I took him into the closet
where I store the gardening tools and he saw these two huge cases of
fireworks standing there. The kid went nuts. He wanted to open BOTH
boxes so he could see what all 159 rockets looked like lined up next to
each other. This kid has promise. I told him: "Since mom only thinks I
have a few of these things lying around, maybe that wasn't such a good
idea." He mulled that over for a few seconds, then gave me a real big
smile in agreement.

We pulled one of the rockets out of the box and re-locked the closet
door.

He and I both sat down on the driveway and proceeded to take it apart. It
was a standard issue big-ass Chinese sky rocket. I bet they used these to
kill people 500 years ago. As I sat there taking layer after layer of
paper off, his brain was filling with the details of construction. Tissue,
cardboard, plastic, fuses...etc. Realizing that he was mentally storing
the design for some future project sorta made me shudder. All I was
thinking was the fact that this thing was probably put together by a
political prisoner in a hellhole somewhere who is probably gonna get
'executed' so they can sell his internal organs on the transplant market.

Probably not too far from the facts, but I managed to do a bit of
explaining to him from the standpoint of aerospace engineering regarding
how the thing worked. Doug is probably the only 4th grader in the U.S.
who can now describe the principle of thrust using a control volume model.

The rocket was pretty simple. It had a very large booster engine topped
with a warhead that contained the red sparkly things that exploded.
Removing the warhead was as simple as giving a quick twist, and I assumed
the neutered rocket would fly higher without the payload. I was correct.
Doug and I did a daylight 'stealth' test and were able to add about 50% to
the altitude attained the previous night. We decided to modify four more
rockets and put them aside in the closet for easy access. When this was
done, Doug had a jar full of stuff that came out of the warheads
including: 12 fuses about 3-inches long each, some paper, 4 plastic
nosecones and a big handfull of these little black balls about the size of
12-gauge buckshot that turned out to be the 'red sparkly popper things'.
It appeared that the outer layer was a simple gunpowder coating designed
to quickly burn off as red shower of sparks. I surmised that the inner
core had some kind of magnesium thermite that gave off an intense white
light and a loud bang. Pretty cool if you ask me. Lots of energy packed
into one teeny little ball.

I didn't want to see the popper thingies go to waste, so I told Doug we
were gonna put them in a hole in the ground and set them off. He gave me
another big smile.

It's amazing how kids think alike...even when separated by 30 years.

As I was digging a shallow hole with my hand, Doug asked if it would be
alright to put an army man next to these things so that "When they go off,
it would look like he was getting shot with a maching gun".
Dang....exactly what I was thinking. I agreed and he ran off to his room
to dig something out of the mess. He returned in about 3 seconds, out of
breath and holding a cheap plastic imitation of Robert E. Lee on
horseback and a Civil War cannon. I pointed out that they didn't have
true machine guns in the Civil War, but we would overlook this for the
purpose of the demonstration. He handed me the action figure and I placed
it and the cannon next to a rather large pile of black beads from which a
few of the fuses extended.

I figured that three inches of fuse would take 2 seconds to burn, so I
had at least that amount of time to stand up and take a few steps back. I
neglected to recount the night before.....when the warhead ignited
IMMEDIATELY upon reaching apogee. Tricky Chinese. They had installed
extremely fast-burning fuse in these things and that fact totally escaped
me.

I squatted next to Robert Lee and gave a short eulogy. Doug laughed. I
took the trusty Bic lighter and placed it next to the fuse. One flick got
the lighter going and THIS IMAGE IS ONE I WILL REMEMBER FOR A LONG TIME.
My hand holding a lighter next to a pile of explosives.

There is usually a short but noticeable mental pause that occurs
immediately before something bad or really stupid happens. It is where
that little voice in your head says: "You dumbass."

The fuse burn time was in the 1/1000ths of a second range. The pile of
little popper thingy's immediately ignited into a tremendously brilliant
ball of fire. All I could think was ..."...th....th.....thermite..."
Unfortunately, when they are viewed at ground level, these little popper
thingies become REALLY BIG POPPER THINGIES and have a tendency to jump up
to 15-feet in every direction from their point of ignition. I
instantaneously became engulfed in a ball of fire that sounded a lot like
being in a half-done bag of Orville Reddenbacher's popcorn.

It was all over about as fast as I could snap my fingers.

After the smoke cleared, Doug started laughing his butt off. That meant
I was still in one piece. Doug does not laugh at dismembered limbs. He
said I jumped about 10-feet, an action that I do not remember. I checked
my clothes for burn marks, and found none. He checked my back to make
sure it was not on fire. No combustion there. The driveway was peppered
with black holes where the concrete had been scarred from these things.

A close one. Another REAL close one. My mind ran the tapes again to
re-hash what it had seen. All I remembered was being inside something
akin to a 30-foot diameter........flaming dandelion. Whew.

We examined Ol' Robert E. at ground-zero.

Instead of a machine-gun peppering, he got nuked. He and the horse he
rode in on.......and his cannon too. One side was untouched, but the
other side was arc-welded. Real warfare. Doug examined it real
quiet-like and then started laughing again.

I assume he will remember the finer points of the lesson as he grows
older. When I now speak of 'almost being burned beyond recognition' he
will have a slightly better understanding of what I mean. I hope that
this vivid image tempers the knowledge he now has regarding rocket
construction. O well. After all, if your dad isn't gonna teach you how to
get your ass blown off, who will?


--

Never Forget
http://www.gunstuff.com/america-attacked.html

Brilliant! Thanks for that; a wonderful read.

..
..
and happy 4th to you!

On Fri, 2 Jul 2010 21:39:07 -0500, "ChairMan" wrote the
following:

It's that time of year again.......
Happy 4th

Out Freaking Standing, sir. That's a keeper, that one.
Tawm Watson, move over.


I asked which of my three kids wanted to light the fuse, but all took a
few steps back and politely declined. Chicken****s. Kids just aren't
made the same nowadays. They fulfill their danger quotient by shooting
bad guys in video games. About as far from real danger as you can get, if
you ask me.

I miss the real Roman candles, actually a 12-pack of colored flares in
one tube, with sparkies in between 60' shots. Kids nowadays don't
know what real fun is, the silly ten-fingered idiots.


I didn't want to see the popper thingies go to waste, so I told Doug we
were gonna put them in a hole in the ground and set them off. He gave me
another big smile.

It's amazing how kids think alike...even when separated by 30 years.

big grin


I assume he will remember the finer points of the lesson as he grows
older. When I now speak of 'almost being burned beyond recognition' he
will have a slightly better understanding of what I mean. I hope that
this vivid image tempers the knowledge he now has regarding rocket
construction. O well. After all, if your dad isn't gonna teach you how to
get your ass blown off, who will?

Hooah!

--
The most powerful factors in the world are clear ideas
in the minds of energetic men of good will.
-- J. Arthur Thomson

On Jul 3, 11:10*am, Larry Jaques wrote:
On Fri, 2 Jul 2010 21:39:07 -0500, "ChairMan" wrote the
following:

It's that time of year again.......
Happy 4th

Out Freaking Standing, sir. *That's a keeper, that one.
Tawm Watson, move over.

I asked which of my three kids wanted to light the fuse, but all took a
few steps back and politely declined. *Chicken****s. *Kids just aren't
made the same nowadays. *They fulfill their danger quotient by shooting
bad guys in video games. *About as far from real danger as you can get, if
you ask me.

I miss the real Roman candles, actually a 12-pack of colored flares in
one tube, with sparkies in between 60' shots. *Kids nowadays don't
know what real fun is, the silly ten-fingered idiots.

I didn't want to see the popper thingies go to waste, so I told Doug we
were gonna put them in a hole in the ground and set them off. *He gave me
another big smile.

It's amazing how kids think alike...even when separated by 30 years.

big grin

I assume he will remember the finer points of the lesson as he grows
older. When I now speak of 'almost being burned beyond recognition' he
will have a slightly better understanding of what I mean. *I hope that
this vivid image tempers the knowledge he now has regarding rocket
construction. O well. *After all, if your dad isn't gonna teach you how to
get your ass blown off, who will?

Hooah!

--
The most powerful factors in the world are clear ideas
in the minds of energetic men of good will.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * -- J. Arthur Thomson

An interesting read. By the way General Lee's horse was named
Traveler.
Joe G

On 2010-07-03, Larry Jaques wrote:

....don't know what real fun is, the silly ten-fingered idiots.

ROFL!

If you haven't had a firecracker go off in your hand, you haven't
experienced real fireworks fun!! I've done it twice, never suffering
any damage. If you want some real pain, hold a shotgun primer on the
end of a screwdriver over a candle flame (seven yrs old and dumb as a
post). Howzabout hitting a Bullzeye explosive target, on a concrete
floor, with a 20 lb sledge hammer? That'll cost you yer hearing for a
few hours. Ahh... the memories.

I jes moved from CO from CA. While the CO gun laws here are amazing,
CO fireworks laws are just as stupid as CA. Safe and sane crap, only.
IOW, why bother. I get more pyrotechnic action shooting my 44 mag
revolver in the dark.

Check this map:

http://www.pyrouniverse.com/regulations.htm

If you live next to a green state, time for a trip! If not, have them
shipped to you. Say what?

When I still lived in CA, I was intrigued when a bobtail no-name
shipping company truck pulled up to my FIL's house and delivered a
tv-sized box to the door. I was flat-out stunned when my FIL opened
the box to reveal a veritable treasure trove of serious kick-ass
illegal as hell fireworks. Yes, it may be against the law in your
state, but see if those AL and TN fireworks companies give a
goodgoddamn! You send 'em money and they will ship them to your front
door (or used to). But, it's yer ass after they deliver! Give 'em a
call and see.

nb

On Sat, 03 Jul 2010 15:48:05 +0000, notbob wrote:

If you haven't had a firecracker go off in your hand, you haven't
experienced real fireworks fun!! I've done it twice, never suffering
any damage. If you want some real pain, hold a shotgun primer on the
end of a screwdriver over a candle flame (seven yrs old and dumb as a
post). Howzabout hitting a Bullzeye explosive target, on a concrete
floor, with a 20 lb sledge hammer? That'll cost you yer hearing for a
few hours. Ahh... the memories.

In my younger dumber days a few of us were into making explosives.
Including nitroglycerin. I decided to put a drop on an anvil and hit it
with a hammer. Split the anvil and we never did find the hammer head. I
was standing there with a wooden handle and a terrified look :-).

--
Intelligence is an experiment that failed - G. B. Shaw

On 2010-07-03, Larry Blanchard wrote:

In my younger dumber days a few of us were into making explosives.
Including nitroglycerin.

Omigod, you can make yer own nitro!? Don't tell me that!

nb

Who did you rip off for their heart medication?

Some here have trouble differentiating between movie scams and reality...LOL


"Larry Blanchard" wrote in message
...
In my younger dumber days a few of us were into making explosives.
Including nitroglycerin. I decided to put a drop on an anvil and hit it
with a hammer. Split the anvil and we never did find the hammer head. I
was standing there with a wooden handle and a terrified look :-).



On Sat, 03 Jul 2010 15:48:05 +0000, notbob wrote:

If you haven't had a firecracker go off in your hand, you haven't
experienced real fireworks fun!! I've done it twice, never suffering
any damage. If you want some real pain, hold a shotgun primer on the
end of a screwdriver over a candle flame (seven yrs old and dumb as a
post). Howzabout hitting a Bullzeye explosive target, on a concrete
floor, with a 20 lb sledge hammer? That'll cost you yer hearing for a
few hours. Ahh... the memories.

--
Intelligence is an experiment that failed - G. B. Shaw

In ,
Larry Jaques spewed forth:
On Fri, 2 Jul 2010 21:39:07 -0500, "ChairMan" wrote the
following:

It's that time of year again.......
Happy 4th

Out Freaking Standing, sir. That's a keeper, that one.
Tawm Watson, move over.


I asked which of my three kids wanted to light the fuse, but all
took a few steps back and politely declined. Chicken****s. Kids
just aren't made the same nowadays. They fulfill their danger
quotient by shooting bad guys in video games. About as far from
real danger as you can get, if you ask me.

I miss the real Roman candles, actually a 12-pack of colored flares in
one tube, with sparkies in between 60' shots. Kids nowadays don't
know what real fun is, the silly ten-fingered idiots.


I didn't want to see the popper thingies go to waste, so I told Doug
we were gonna put them in a hole in the ground and set them off. He
gave me another big smile.

It's amazing how kids think alike...even when separated by 30 years.

big grin


I assume he will remember the finer points of the lesson as he grows
older. When I now speak of 'almost being burned beyond recognition'
he will have a slightly better understanding of what I mean. I hope
that this vivid image tempers the knowledge he now has regarding
rocket construction. O well. After all, if your dad isn't gonna
teach you how to get your ass blown off, who will?

Hooah!

Like they say, there's a lot of truth in humor.g
But this one still makes me laugh every time I read it.
And your right, they just don't make 'em like they use to.
I remember fishin' with M-80s back when I was a kid.
Oh the fung

In ,
dadiOH spewed forth:
ChairMan wrote:

snip cute story

I assume he will remember the finer points of the lesson as he grows
older. When I now speak of 'almost being burned beyond recognition'
he will have a slightly better understanding of what I mean. I hope
that this vivid image tempers the knowledge he now has regarding
rocket construction. O well. After all, if your dad isn't gonna
teach you how to get your ass blown off, who will?

Right. Idiocy survives generational change

Sometime stupid is a dominant geneg

In ,
Robatoy spewed forth:
Brilliant! Thanks for that; a wonderful read.

.
.
and happy 4th to you!

I try to share it ever 4th. After almost 10 years, I still laugh my ass off
every time I read it
Almost as good a taser story

"ChairMan" wrote in message
.com...
In ,
Larry Jaques spewed forth:
On Fri, 2 Jul 2010 21:39:07 -0500, "ChairMan" wrote the
following:

It's that time of year again.......
Happy 4th

Out Freaking Standing, sir. That's a keeper, that one.
Tawm Watson, move over.


I asked which of my three kids wanted to light the fuse, but all
took a few steps back and politely declined. Chicken****s. Kids
just aren't made the same nowadays. They fulfill their danger
quotient by shooting bad guys in video games. About as far from
real danger as you can get, if you ask me.

I miss the real Roman candles, actually a 12-pack of colored flares in
one tube, with sparkies in between 60' shots. Kids nowadays don't
know what real fun is, the silly ten-fingered idiots.


I didn't want to see the popper thingies go to waste, so I told Doug
we were gonna put them in a hole in the ground and set them off. He
gave me another big smile.

It's amazing how kids think alike...even when separated by 30 years.

big grin


I assume he will remember the finer points of the lesson as he grows
older. When I now speak of 'almost being burned beyond recognition'
he will have a slightly better understanding of what I mean. I hope
that this vivid image tempers the knowledge he now has regarding
rocket construction. O well. After all, if your dad isn't gonna
teach you how to get your ass blown off, who will?

Hooah!

Like they say, there's a lot of truth in humor.g
But this one still makes me laugh every time I read it.
And your right, they just don't make 'em like they use to.
I remember fishin' with M-80s back when I was a kid.
Oh the fung


We used to pull the fuses on those little fire crackers and then light them
and write on concrete with the flame. I stopped that practice after one of
them went off in my hand. Fingers were numb for a few days and the tinnitus
in the right ear never did clear completely. Went back to stuffing potatoes
in exhaust pipes ...

On 2010-07-04, ChairMan wrote:


I remember fishin' with M-80s back when I was a kid.
Oh the fung

Unfortunately, like most other forms of fun, our govt has outlawed
M80s. They are now classified as class D HE (high explosives) along
with cherry bombs and anything larger than 50mg of flash powder.
Mores the pity. Back in the 60s, I used to have a ball with them.
Never did anything stupid (er.. once!) or illegal, but they were a
hoot.

One experiment enlightened us to the real power of M80s. An old
firecracker trick was to punch/drill a hole in the closed end of an
empty soup can. Make the hole just big enough for the firecracker and
shove the cracker in about 3/4 way into the can. Now, put the lidless
end of the soup can facing down in a container of water, like a small
saucepan, so the water came at least a third of the way up the sides
of the can. When you lit the firecracker and it popped, the can acted
like a rocket and would ascend 100-150 ft in the air. Pretty much
harmless fun.

We tried the same with an M80. Yikes! The can went nowhere. It just
flattened out like a butterflied shrimp, the soldered seam having been
ripped apart, and the lid disappeared. It ruined the saucepan, too,
making a bulge in the bottom rendering it useless for cooking. Never
did find the end lid and we rightfully assumed it could have as easily
been embedded in one of our skulls. From that time on, we just set
them off to hear the report, making sure we were standing well back
and the M80 not near any potential shrapnel.

I still lament M80s being declared illegal, though. We never
suffered any harm, despite being collectively dumber'n a bag o'
hammers.

Happy Independence Day, whatever your pyrotechnic proclivities may
be!

nb

I loved the story. It could have happened to me... My next door
neighbor's uncle worked at a fireworks factory and he gave my neighbor
a case of cherry bombs. Only Tom didn't have anyplace to shoot them.
My grandfather's farm was a few miles outside of town where we could
set them off without bothering anyone except a few cows and pigs. Oh,
and my grandmother... Anyway, our parents dropped us off one morning
and we started blowing up everything that looked interesting. Only a
cherry bomb dropped into a rat hole, doesn't make much of anything
except a dull thump. So, I pored in a pint of gas, lit one and tossed
it in! BOOM!!!!!! The earth shook for 10 ft. So, if a little bit is
good a whole lot is better! We pored 5 gal of gasoline down an old
abandoned toilet that had rat holes running everywhere. Then before
we could toss a cherry bomb in the toilet my Grandmother called us in
for lunch. So for the next 30 minutes or so the gasoline fumes spread
throughout the ratholes and filled the shaft of the toilet. After
lunch we walked out to the toilet and I lit and tossed in a cherry
bomb. Tom looked at me, I looked at him and said: "You know, we might
need to run." "No **** Shirlock" was his answer. I almost didn't hear
it, cause I'd already started running. We were at the perfect spot
when the cherry bomb went off. Any closer and the blast would have
killed us, any farther away and the falling lumber, rocks and chunks
of nasty stuff would have killed us. All the windows on that side of
the house were blown in and my grandmother came out to see if we were
dead! When she found out we weren't, she picked up a stick and I
think she tried to kill us herself. When my grandfather came home he
beat us pretty good too, same for my parents and Tom's folks as well.
And for the next two or three days while my dad was fixing the
windows, I'd be walking by and for no reason at all, he'd snatch me up
and spank me again... Even a half a year later at New Years, when I
asked if we could shoot the rest of the cherry bombs, dad snatched me
up and beat me again. I don't know what was dumber, blowing up the
toilet or asking if we could shoot more cherry bombs. One good thing
came of the blast. We didn't need the old toilet out next to the
outbuildings anymore and the resulting hole was about 60' in diameter
and 20' deep. It was right next to the creek and it filled up pretty
quick. A pond is always a good thing on a farm...


On Sun, 04 Jul 2010 15:54:56 GMT, notbob wrote:

On 2010-07-04, ChairMan wrote:


I remember fishin' with M-80s back when I was a kid.
Oh the fung

Unfortunately, like most other forms of fun, our govt has outlawed
M80s. They are now classified as class D HE (high explosives) along
with cherry bombs and anything larger than 50mg of flash powder.
Mores the pity. Back in the 60s, I used to have a ball with them.
Never did anything stupid (er.. once!) or illegal, but they were a
hoot.

One experiment enlightened us to the real power of M80s. An old
firecracker trick was to punch/drill a hole in the closed end of an
empty soup can. Make the hole just big enough for the firecracker and
shove the cracker in about 3/4 way into the can. Now, put the lidless
end of the soup can facing down in a container of water, like a small
saucepan, so the water came at least a third of the way up the sides
of the can. When you lit the firecracker and it popped, the can acted
like a rocket and would ascend 100-150 ft in the air. Pretty much
harmless fun.

We tried the same with an M80. Yikes! The can went nowhere. It just
flattened out like a butterflied shrimp, the soldered seam having been
ripped apart, and the lid disappeared. It ruined the saucepan, too,
making a bulge in the bottom rendering it useless for cooking. Never
did find the end lid and we rightfully assumed it could have as easily
been embedded in one of our skulls. From that time on, we just set
them off to hear the report, making sure we were standing well back
and the M80 not near any potential shrapnel.

I still lament M80s being declared illegal, though. We never
suffered any harm, despite being collectively dumber'n a bag o'
hammers.

Happy Independence Day, whatever your pyrotechnic proclivities may
be!

nb

On 2010-07-04, billw wrote:
I loved the story. It could have happened to me... My next door

The whole thing sounds fictional, but knowing how truly fearless
....and BRAINLESS!.... kids can be, I believe your story. Gasoline is
unbelievably dangerous and kids are astonishingly clueless. I'll not
bore you with the story of how we almost burnt down the house with our
homemade gasoline-ignited match-head propellant BB gun.

It's a wonder I survived childhood.

nb

"notbob" wrote in message
...
On 2010-07-04, ChairMan wrote:


I remember fishin' with M-80s back when I was a kid.
Oh the fung

Unfortunately, like most other forms of fun, our govt has outlawed
M80s.

Our HS had 50 gallon drums in every stairwell for trash. The sound of an
M-80 going off in an empty 50 gallon drum in an enclosed space is just
awesome!

"Larry Blanchard" wrote in message
...
On Sat, 03 Jul 2010 15:48:05 +0000, notbob wrote:

If you haven't had a firecracker go off in your hand, you haven't
experienced real fireworks fun!! I've done it twice, never suffering
any damage. If you want some real pain, hold a shotgun primer on the
end of a screwdriver over a candle flame (seven yrs old and dumb as a
post). Howzabout hitting a Bullzeye explosive target, on a concrete
floor, with a 20 lb sledge hammer? That'll cost you yer hearing for a
few hours. Ahh... the memories.

In my younger dumber days a few of us were into making explosives.
Including nitroglycerin. I decided to put a drop on an anvil and hit it
with a hammer. Split the anvil and we never did find the hammer head. I
was standing there with a wooden handle and a terrified look :-).

The last person I saw do something like that looked suspiciously like a
coyote.

B.

An old friend tells a similiar story. He was a grown, adult at the time,
having a pig roast on his rural property by digging a hole and putting a
wrapped whole pig in the hole with a bonfire etc.. etc..

He poured the gasoline in and his only match didn't work. Went back to the
hosue for a new set of matches and, knowing the danger, stood back as far as
he could. ... ran for his life for 100 yards to his house while it rained
kindling on him the whole way.

I copied him your story as it sounded even more dynamic and he will love it!


"billw" wrote in message
...
I loved the story. It could have happened to me... My next door
neighbor's uncle worked at a fireworks factory and he gave my neighbor
a case of cherry bombs. Only Tom didn't have anyplace to shoot them.
My grandfather's farm was a few miles outside of town where we could
set them off without bothering anyone except a few cows and pigs. Oh,
and my grandmother... Anyway, our parents dropped us off one morning
and we started blowing up everything that looked interesting. Only a
cherry bomb dropped into a rat hole, doesn't make much of anything
except a dull thump. So, I pored in a pint of gas, lit one and tossed
it in! BOOM!!!!!! The earth shook for 10 ft. So, if a little bit is
good a whole lot is better! We pored 5 gal of gasoline down an old
abandoned toilet that had rat holes running everywhere. Then before
we could toss a cherry bomb in the toilet my Grandmother called us in
for lunch. So for the next 30 minutes or so the gasoline fumes spread
throughout the ratholes and filled the shaft of the toilet. After
lunch we walked out to the toilet and I lit and tossed in a cherry
bomb. Tom looked at me, I looked at him and said: "You know, we might
need to run." "No **** Shirlock" was his answer. I almost didn't hear
it, cause I'd already started running. We were at the perfect spot
when the cherry bomb went off. Any closer and the blast would have
killed us, any farther away and the falling lumber, rocks and chunks
of nasty stuff would have killed us. All the windows on that side of
the house were blown in and my grandmother came out to see if we were
dead! When she found out we weren't, she picked up a stick and I
think she tried to kill us herself. When my grandfather came home he
beat us pretty good too, same for my parents and Tom's folks as well.
And for the next two or three days while my dad was fixing the
windows, I'd be walking by and for no reason at all, he'd snatch me up
and spank me again... Even a half a year later at New Years, when I
asked if we could shoot the rest of the cherry bombs, dad snatched me
up and beat me again. I don't know what was dumber, blowing up the
toilet or asking if we could shoot more cherry bombs. One good thing
came of the blast. We didn't need the old toilet out next to the
outbuildings anymore and the resulting hole was about 60' in diameter
and 20' deep. It was right next to the creek and it filled up pretty
quick. A pond is always a good thing on a farm...


On Sun, 04 Jul 2010 15:54:56 GMT, notbob wrote:

On 2010-07-04, ChairMan wrote:


I remember fishin' with M-80s back when I was a kid.
Oh the fung

Unfortunately, like most other forms of fun, our govt has outlawed
M80s. They are now classified as class D HE (high explosives) along
with cherry bombs and anything larger than 50mg of flash powder.
Mores the pity. Back in the 60s, I used to have a ball with them.
Never did anything stupid (er.. once!) or illegal, but they were a
hoot.

One experiment enlightened us to the real power of M80s. An old
firecracker trick was to punch/drill a hole in the closed end of an
empty soup can. Make the hole just big enough for the firecracker and
shove the cracker in about 3/4 way into the can. Now, put the lidless
end of the soup can facing down in a container of water, like a small
saucepan, so the water came at least a third of the way up the sides
of the can. When you lit the firecracker and it popped, the can acted
like a rocket and would ascend 100-150 ft in the air. Pretty much
harmless fun.

We tried the same with an M80. Yikes! The can went nowhere. It just
flattened out like a butterflied shrimp, the soldered seam having been
ripped apart, and the lid disappeared. It ruined the saucepan, too,
making a bulge in the bottom rendering it useless for cooking. Never
did find the end lid and we rightfully assumed it could have as easily
been embedded in one of our skulls. From that time on, we just set
them off to hear the report, making sure we were standing well back
and the M80 not near any potential shrapnel.

I still lament M80s being declared illegal, though. We never
suffered any harm, despite being collectively dumber'n a bag o'
hammers.

Happy Independence Day, whatever your pyrotechnic proclivities may
be!

nb

On Sun, 4 Jul 2010 21:33:33 -0400, "Buddy Matlosz"
wrote the following:


"Larry Blanchard" wrote in message
...
On Sat, 03 Jul 2010 15:48:05 +0000, notbob wrote:

If you haven't had a firecracker go off in your hand, you haven't
experienced real fireworks fun!! I've done it twice, never suffering
any damage. If you want some real pain, hold a shotgun primer on the
end of a screwdriver over a candle flame (seven yrs old and dumb as a
post). Howzabout hitting a Bullzeye explosive target, on a concrete
floor, with a 20 lb sledge hammer? That'll cost you yer hearing for a
few hours. Ahh... the memories.

In my younger dumber days a few of us were into making explosives.
Including nitroglycerin. I decided to put a drop on an anvil and hit it
with a hammer. Split the anvil and we never did find the hammer head. I
was standing there with a wooden handle and a terrified look :-).

The last person I saw do something like that looked suspiciously like a
coyote.

meep, meep


--
It's also helpful to realize that this very body that we have, that's
sitting right here right now, with its aches and its pleasures, is
exactly what we need to be fully human, fully awake, fully alive.
-- Pema Chodron

On Sun, 04 Jul 2010 21:33:33 -0400, Buddy Matlosz wrote:

In my younger dumber days a few of us were into making explosives.
Including nitroglycerin. I decided to put a drop on an anvil and hit
it with a hammer. Split the anvil and we never did find the hammer
head. I was standing there with a wooden handle and a terrified look
:-).

The last person I saw do something like that looked suspiciously like a
coyote.



Maybe I should sue the cartoonist for stealing my idea :-).

--
Intelligence is an experiment that failed - G. B. Shaw

On 7/5/2010 8:47 AM, Larry Jaques wrote:
On Sun, 4 Jul 2010 21:33:33 -0400, "Buddy Matlosz"
wrote the following:

"Larry wrote in message
...

In my younger dumber days a few of us were into making explosives.
Including nitroglycerin. I decided to put a drop on an anvil and hit it
with a hammer. Split the anvil and we never did find the hammer head. I
was standing there with a wooden handle and a terrified look :-).

The last person I saw do something like that looked suspiciously like a
coyote.

meep, meep

I wonder how many Acme anvils Wile E. went through during his career? :-)

--
A. Because it makes the discussion harder to read.
Q. Why should I not top-post?
To reply, eat the taco.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/bbqboyee/

On Jul 3, 4:11*pm, Larry Blanchard wrote:
On Sat, 03 Jul 2010 15:48:05 +0000, notbob wrote:
If you haven't had a firecracker go off in your hand, you haven't
experienced real fireworks fun!! *I've done it twice, never suffering
any damage. *If you want some real pain, hold a shotgun primer on the
end of a screwdriver over a candle flame (seven yrs old and dumb as a
post). Howzabout hitting a Bullzeye explosive target, on a concrete
floor, with a 20 lb sledge hammer? *That'll cost you yer hearing for a
few hours. * Ahh... the memories. *

In my younger dumber days a few of us were into making explosives. *
Including nitroglycerin. *I decided to put a drop on an anvil and hit it
with a hammer. *Split the anvil and we never did find the hammer head. *I
was standing there with a wooden handle and a terrified look :-).

--
Intelligence is an experiment that failed - G. B. Shaw

Kid stuff.

48 oz can of fertilizer ( I know which kind), some diesel fuel and a
blasting cap, auger into a 20 stump, down 24", drop in can, walk
away...awaaaaay.... set it off.
One stump went up so high, we almost lost sight of it. The others that
farmer did just exploded into slivers.
That was a fun afternoon.

On Mon, 5 Jul 2010 15:30:47 +0000 (UTC), Larry Blanchard
wrote the following:

On Sun, 04 Jul 2010 21:33:33 -0400, Buddy Matlosz wrote:

In my younger dumber days a few of us were into making explosives.
Including nitroglycerin. I decided to put a drop on an anvil and hit
it with a hammer. Split the anvil and we never did find the hammer
head. I was standing there with a wooden handle and a terrified look
:-).

The last person I saw do something like that looked suspiciously like a
coyote.

Maybe I should sue the cartoonist for stealing my idea :-).

There ya go. Sue _Disney_ for sharesies!

--
It's also helpful to realize that this very body that we have, that's
sitting right here right now, with its aches and its pleasures, is
exactly what we need to be fully human, fully awake, fully alive.
-- Pema Chodron

In ,
Larry Jaques spewed forth:
On Mon, 5 Jul 2010 15:30:47 +0000 (UTC), Larry Blanchard
wrote the following:

On Sun, 04 Jul 2010 21:33:33 -0400, Buddy Matlosz wrote:

In my younger dumber days a few of us were into making explosives.
Including nitroglycerin. I decided to put a drop on an anvil and
hit it with a hammer. Split the anvil and we never did find the
hammer head. I was standing there with a wooden handle and a
terrified look :-).

The last person I saw do something like that looked suspiciously
like a coyote.

Maybe I should sue the cartoonist for stealing my idea :-).

There ya go. Sue _Disney_ for sharesies!

I'm sure someone will hit me with an anvil if I'm wrongg, but I think it
would be Looney Tunes and Warner Bros.
Unless Disney bought 'em, which wouldn't surprise me.