I am interested whether any of the keen DIYers on the group have built
or considered building a coffin. I like to think I have a few years
left in me, but I thought it might be a good project, particularly
considering the horrendous prices charged by undertakers for a simple
wooden box, often with some appalling faux brass fitting, more worthy
of a cheap kids football trophy.
Any guidance on rules, regulations and other considerations would be
gratefully received.
It will have to go on my list of projects to be done, somewhere after,
the window renovation, the pizza oven, the new bedroom cupboards, the
additional bathroom etc.
Regards
Tim

In message
, Tim
Decker writes
I am interested whether any of the keen DIYers on the group have built
or considered building a coffin. I like to think I have a few years
left in me, but I thought it might be a good project, particularly
considering the horrendous prices charged by undertakers for a simple
wooden box, often with some appalling faux brass fitting, more worthy
of a cheap kids football trophy.
Any guidance on rules, regulations and other considerations would be
gratefully received.
It will have to go on my list of projects to be done, somewhere after,
the window renovation, the pizza oven, the new bedroom cupboards, the
additional bathroom etc.

A friend was buried in a wicker coffin.

The only downside I noticed was the creaking as it was carried.

regards

--
Tim Lamb

Tim Decker wrote:
I am interested whether any of the keen DIYers on the group have built
or considered building a coffin. I like to think I have a few years
left in me, but I thought it might be a good project, particularly
considering the horrendous prices charged by undertakers for a simple
wooden box, often with some appalling faux brass fitting, more worthy
of a cheap kids football trophy.
Any guidance on rules, regulations and other considerations would be
gratefully received.
It will have to go on my list of projects to be done, somewhere after,
the window renovation, the pizza oven, the new bedroom cupboards, the
additional bathroom etc.
Regards
Tim

I believe I heard that there are now restrictions on materials used in
coffins involving cremation. Presumably pollution problem.

On Wed, 19 Aug 2009 01:13:22 -0700 (PDT), Tim Decker
had this to say:

I am interested whether any of the keen DIYers on the group have built
or considered building a coffin. I like to think I have a few years
left in me, but I thought it might be a good project, particularly
considering the horrendous prices charged by undertakers for a simple
wooden box, often with some appalling faux brass fitting, more worthy
of a cheap kids football trophy.
Any guidance on rules, regulations and other considerations would be
gratefully received.

I think there's a lot more than simply the wooden box. There's the
cost of collecting the corpse, laying it out (perhaps embalming it),
the shroud, transport, standing by during a service at a church and/or
crematorium, negotiations with graveyard owners if the body's to be
interred, and so on.

--
Frank Erskine

On 19 Aug, 09:13, Tim Decker wrote:

It will have to go on my list of projects to be done, somewhere after,
the window renovation, the pizza oven, the new bedroom cupboards, the
additional bathroom etc.
Regards
Tim

you could make the pizza oven "something to behold" and capable of
taking a coffin?
or permit your surviving nearests & dearests to fold your bones into
an unusual shape to fit an equally unusually shaped coffin that would
then fit into the pizza oven.....

it is DIY after all....

cheers
jimK

Be sure to make it *look* like a diy-project coffin.

White or "wood effect" melamine finish.

Some gilt wardrobe door knobs on it.

Wonky.

Either ridiculously heavy or far too flimsy.

Some really inappropriate improvised bit - e.g. coat-hooks from the
MFI wardrobe you salvaged to make it.

And an angle grinder displayed on the lid.

Owain wrote:
Unless someone can do a last-minute assembly from flat panels, don't
underestimate the storage space a coffin will take up. Unless you're
very goth you probably don't want it doubling up as a sideboard until
you need it.

You could keep it outside and use it as a top-bar beehive.
Some examples here : http://www.cornwallhoney.com/beehives.html

--
Reentrant

On 19 Aug, 09:13, Tim Decker wrote:
I am interested whether any of the keen DIYers on the group have built
or considered building a coffin.

Yes, I've repaired them semi-commercially too.

My advice is to seriously consider buying commercial. If you shop
around, you don't have to pay the inflated prices. On-line is good too
(Eco-coffins?), especially if you like wicker. This is what I used for
my mother's, as it was sudden, unexpected and I had no time to build.
Really you're either going to pre-build or buy-in, the only time
coffins are built to order is for the comedically obese when there's
no other way.

The Natural Death Handbook is a great book generally and is good on
regulatory aspects here. Note that burial is fussy about materials and
often benefits from prior discussion (they don't object to much, but
do like to be consulted). Cremation is fussy about materials and also
about fitting on the conveyor without jamming. Wicker etc. needs a
couple of solid wood strips underneath, or else a plywood base.

Othewise build is a matter of pre-veneered plywood, glued and screwed
with lots of inner bracing blocks, hidden under the lining. Solid wood
trim is router or shaper-work moulding on the outside to hide the
edges. You can build the lot in a day, but finishing takes longer.
Painted black is easier (plain MDF), but you'll need spray gear to
finish it quickly.

A good book on knots and some attractive cordage is an attractive
alternative to handles. Wooden bridge blocks down the side, a length
of shiny white cotton rope and some decorative stopper knots.

On 19 Aug, 12:01, Andy Dingley wrote:
On 19 Aug, 09:13, Tim Decker wrote:

I am interested whether any of the keen DIYers on the group have built
or considered building a coffin.

Yes, I've repaired them semi-commercially too.

My advice is to seriously consider buying commercial. If you shop
around, you don't have to pay the inflated prices. On-line is good too
(Eco-coffins?), especially if you like wicker. This is what I used for
my mother's, as it was sudden, unexpected and I had no time to build.
Really you're either going to pre-build or buy-in, the only time
coffins are built to order is for the comedically obese when there's
no other way.

The Natural Death Handbook is a great book generally and is good on
regulatory aspects here. Note that burial is fussy about materials and
often benefits from prior discussion (they don't object to much, but
do like to be consulted). Cremation is fussy about materials and also
about fitting on the conveyor without jamming. Wicker etc. needs a
couple of solid wood strips underneath, or else a plywood base.

Othewise build is a matter of pre-veneered plywood, glued and screwed
with lots of inner bracing blocks, hidden under the lining. Solid wood
trim is router or shaper-work moulding on the outside to hide the
edges. You can build the lot in a day, but finishing takes longer.
Painted black is easier (plain MDF), but you'll need spray gear to
finish it quickly.

A good book on knots and some attractive cordage is an attractive
alternative to handles. Wooden bridge blocks down the side, a length
of shiny white cotton rope and some decorative stopper knots.

OH come on Andy - it's got to have the Angle Grinder somewhere, even
if just for a talking point. They are after all the campaign medal of
UK DIYers! Mind you it won't cremate I suppose and there may be some
resistance for some reason from a burial authority.

Rob

On 19 Aug, 13:01, Rob G wrote:

OH come on Andy - it's got to have the Angle Grinder somewhere, even
if just for a talking point. They are after all the campaign medal of
UK DIYers! *Mind you it won't cremate I suppose

I went to a Goth friend's funeral a while back. As they hadn't been
allowed to cremate him wearing his new boots (NewRocks, huge and
largely plastic) they had to sit on top of the coffin through the
service.

On Wed, 19 Aug 2009 05:01:48 -0700 (PDT), Rob G
had this to say:

On 19 Aug, 12:01, Andy Dingley wrote:
On 19 Aug, 09:13, Tim Decker wrote:

I am interested whether any of the keen DIYers on the group have built
or considered building a coffin.

Yes, I've repaired them semi-commercially too.

My advice is to seriously consider buying commercial. If you shop
around, you don't have to pay the inflated prices. On-line is good too
(Eco-coffins?), especially if you like wicker. This is what I used for
my mother's, as it was sudden, unexpected and I had no time to build.
Really you're either going to pre-build or buy-in, the only time
coffins are built to order is for the comedically obese when there's
no other way.

The Natural Death Handbook is a great book generally and is good on
regulatory aspects here. Note that burial is fussy about materials and
often benefits from prior discussion (they don't object to much, but
do like to be consulted). Cremation is fussy about materials and also
about fitting on the conveyor without jamming. Wicker etc. needs a
couple of solid wood strips underneath, or else a plywood base.

Othewise build is a matter of pre-veneered plywood, glued and screwed
with lots of inner bracing blocks, hidden under the lining. Solid wood
trim is router or shaper-work moulding on the outside to hide the
edges. You can build the lot in a day, but finishing takes longer.
Painted black is easier (plain MDF), but you'll need spray gear to
finish it quickly.

A good book on knots and some attractive cordage is an attractive
alternative to handles. Wooden bridge blocks down the side, a length
of shiny white cotton rope and some decorative stopper knots.

OH come on Andy - it's got to have the Angle Grinder somewhere, even
if just for a talking point. They are after all the campaign medal of
UK DIYers! Mind you it won't cremate I suppose and there may be some
resistance for some reason from a burial authority.

What about a load of car body filler to secure you into it?

--
Frank Erskine

On Wed, 19 Aug 2009 04:01:40 -0700 (PDT), Andy Dingley wrote:

, 09:13, Tim Decker wrote:
I am interested whether any of the keen DIYers on the group have built
or considered building a coffin.

Yes, I've repaired them semi-commercially too.

Do you have to dig them up first?
--
Peter.
The head of a pin will hold more angels if
it's been flattened with an angel-grinder.

Frank Erskine wrote:
On Wed, 19 Aug 2009 01:13:22 -0700 (PDT), Tim Decker
had this to say:

I am interested whether any of the keen DIYers on the group have built
or considered building a coffin. I like to think I have a few years
left in me, but I thought it might be a good project, particularly
considering the horrendous prices charged by undertakers for a simple
wooden box, often with some appalling faux brass fitting, more worthy
of a cheap kids football trophy.
Any guidance on rules, regulations and other considerations would be
gratefully received.

I think there's a lot more than simply the wooden box. There's the
cost of collecting the corpse, laying it out (perhaps embalming it),
the shroud, transport, standing by during a service at a church and/or
crematorium, negotiations with graveyard owners if the body's to be
interred, and so on.

Of course; but a few months ago IIRC the itemised cost of MIL's coffin -
the cheapest on offer (and no, it wasn't me who chose it!) - was north
of 400 quid. And just veneered chipboard or something. Total bill was
IIRC 2400 quid, and I'm sure that had I produced a DIY coffin, then the
400 would not have been chargeable.

Especially for cremations, I don't know[1] why you can't just rent a
coffin TBH, by far the most eco-friendly and economical route. You
could have a flashy, polished outer which is used for the funeral, then
when Hector the Rector presses the button at the service and the coffin
slides away or the curtain closes, the crem staff out the back whip out
the deceased, enclosed in a sealed body-bag or cardboard liner or
something, and pop him/her into the oven. Outer goes back to the
undertaker for the next punter.

David

[1] Could it be related to the exhorbitant purchase price of a coffin,I
wonder?

"Lobster" wrote in message
news:RTSim.314741

Especially for cremations, I don't know[1] why you can't just rent a
coffin TBH, by far the most eco-friendly and economical route. You could
have a flashy, polished outer which is used for the funeral, then when
Hector the Rector presses the button at the service and the coffin slides
away or the curtain closes, the crem staff out the back whip out the
deceased, enclosed in a sealed body-bag or cardboard liner or something,
and pop him/her into the oven. Outer goes back to the undertaker for the
next punter.

And you think this is'nt happenning behind closed doors?
double bubble!
--
Vass

On Wed, 19 Aug 2009 02:57:18 -0700, RubberBiker wrote:

Be sure to make it *look* like a diy-project coffin.

Maybe there's scope for some sort of "Coffin SOS" TV programme, where they
come in and trick out your shoddy coffin with all sorts of tat on a
limited budget?

Tim Decker wrote:
I am interested whether any of the keen DIYers on the group have built
or considered building a coffin. I like to think I have a few years
left in me, but I thought it might be a good project, particularly
considering the horrendous prices charged by undertakers for a simple
wooden box, often with some appalling faux brass fitting, more worthy
of a cheap kids football trophy.
Any guidance on rules, regulations and other considerations would be
gratefully received.
It will have to go on my list of projects to be done, somewhere after,
the window renovation, the pizza oven, the new bedroom cupboards, the
additional bathroom etc.
Regards
Tim

I want a fire proof coffin - just in case I'm still alive ;-)

--
David in Normandy.
To e-mail you must include the password FROG on the
subject line, or it will be automatically deleted
by a filter and not reach my inbox.

"Lobster" wrote in message
...
Frank Erskine wrote:
On Wed, 19 Aug 2009 01:13:22 -0700 (PDT), Tim Decker
had this to say:

I am interested whether any of the keen DIYers on the group have built
or considered building a coffin. I like to think I have a few years
left in me, but I thought it might be a good project, particularly
considering the horrendous prices charged by undertakers for a simple
wooden box, often with some appalling faux brass fitting, more worthy
of a cheap kids football trophy.
Any guidance on rules, regulations and other considerations would be
gratefully received.

I think there's a lot more than simply the wooden box. There's the
cost of collecting the corpse, laying it out (perhaps embalming it),
the shroud, transport, standing by during a service at a church and/or
crematorium, negotiations with graveyard owners if the body's to be
interred, and so on.

Of course; but a few months ago IIRC the itemised cost of MIL's coffin -
the cheapest on offer (and no, it wasn't me who chose it!) - was north of
400 quid. And just veneered chipboard or something. Total bill was IIRC
2400 quid, and I'm sure that had I produced a DIY coffin, then the 400
would not have been chargeable.

Especially for cremations, I don't know[1] why you can't just rent a
coffin TBH, by far the most eco-friendly and economical route. You could
have a flashy, polished outer which is used for the funeral, then when
Hector the Rector presses the button at the service and the coffin slides
away or the curtain closes, the crem staff out the back whip out the
deceased, enclosed in a sealed body-bag or cardboard liner or something,
and pop him/her into the oven. Outer goes back to the undertaker for the
next punter.

My cousin (Ex Co-Op hearse driver) suggests that this is the norm anyway.
Many of the expensive versions are reclaimed by the undertakers and removed
out of sight in the lower section of the hearse when they leave the
premises.
Being buried scuppers this idea completely.

Personally I'm gonna be buried a mile out at sea and have 100000 illegal
immigrants dance on me grave... ;-)

"Tim Decker" wrote in message
...
I am interested whether any of the keen DIYers on the group have built
or considered building a coffin. I like to think I have a few years
left in me, but I thought it might be a good project, particularly
considering the horrendous prices charged by undertakers for a simple
wooden box, often with some appalling faux brass fitting, more worthy
of a cheap kids football trophy.
Any guidance on rules, regulations and other considerations would be
gratefully received.
It will have to go on my list of projects to be done, somewhere after,
the window renovation, the pizza oven, the new bedroom cupboards, the
additional bathroom etc.


You wanna use this lot.....

http://www.creativecoffins.com

On 19 Aug, 15:49, Jules
wrote:
On Wed, 19 Aug 2009 02:57:18 -0700, RubberBiker wrote:
Be sure to make it *look* like a diy-project coffin.

Maybe there's scope for some sort of "Coffin SOS" TV programme, where they
come in and trick out your shoddy coffin with all sorts of tat on a
limited budget?

Pimp My Casket...No one beats Ghana for a colourful send off

http://www.ghanaweb.com/GhanaHomePag...y.php?ID=52081

Though lot of commercial coffins were flat pack, wrap round sides on
solid base , makes for easier storage.

DF Coffin and Casket used to have a huge plant near Annan, not sure if
related to the DFS furniture chain.

Adam

I want a fire proof coffin - just in case I'm still alive ;-)

You could make one with a buried layer of asbestos - I'm sure the
staff at the crematorium will be terribly amused by it.

On 19 Aug, 14:13, Lobster wrote:

Especially for cremations, I don't know[1] why you can't just rent a
coffin TBH,

You can. Read the Natural Death Handbook for contact details (AFAIR).

On 19 Aug, 16:12, "R" wrote:

Personally I'm gonna be buried a mile out at sea

Have you _seen_ the regulations for burial at sea? Enough to put you
right off.

OTOH, horse-drawn hearses seem like a good deal overall.

On 19 Aug, 14:04, PeterC wrote:

Yes, I've repaired them semi-commercially too.

Do you have to dig them up first?

Neighbouring undertaker. Knocks and scratches in transit needed
repairs pronto. Also handle upgrades (six to eight, and better
attachment) when one occupant was too fat to carry otherwise.

Lidl's folding steel trestles are handy too.

"Lobster" wrote in message
...
Frank Erskine wrote:
On Wed, 19 Aug 2009 01:13:22 -0700 (PDT), Tim Decker
had this to say:

I am interested whether any of the keen DIYers on the group have built
or considered building a coffin. I like to think I have a few years
left in me, but I thought it might be a good project, particularly
considering the horrendous prices charged by undertakers for a simple
wooden box, often with some appalling faux brass fitting, more worthy
of a cheap kids football trophy.
Any guidance on rules, regulations and other considerations would be
gratefully received.

I think there's a lot more than simply the wooden box. There's the
cost of collecting the corpse, laying it out (perhaps embalming it),
the shroud, transport, standing by during a service at a church and/or
crematorium, negotiations with graveyard owners if the body's to be
interred, and so on.

Of course; but a few months ago IIRC the itemised cost of MIL's coffin -
the cheapest on offer (and no, it wasn't me who chose it!) - was north of
400 quid. And just veneered chipboard or something. Total bill was IIRC
2400 quid, and I'm sure that had I produced a DIY coffin, then the 400
would not have been chargeable.

Especially for cremations, I don't know[1] why you can't just rent a
coffin TBH, by far the most eco-friendly and economical route. You could
have a flashy, polished outer which is used for the funeral, then when
Hector the Rector presses the button at the service and the coffin slides
away or the curtain closes, the crem staff out the back whip out the
deceased, enclosed in a sealed body-bag or cardboard liner or something,
and pop him/her into the oven. Outer goes back to the undertaker for the
next punter.

David

[1] Could it be related to the exhorbitant purchase price of a coffin,I
wonder?

I do not think that these can be beaten for value

http://www.funeralsearch.co.uk/cardboard-coffins.php#a3

It would do me.

Adam

You need planning permission and landowner's permission to be
interred.
Yer normal cemeteries already have this, but you'll need to apply for,
eg
a garden burial. Though not required, it's recommended to mention it
on
the deeds to avoid scaring future owners.

I'm sure there's a way through the regulations to allow an outdoor
cremation. After all, the Vikings do it.

--
JGH

Lobster wrote:
Frank Erskine wrote:
On Wed, 19 Aug 2009 01:13:22 -0700 (PDT), Tim Decker
had this to say:

I am interested whether any of the keen DIYers on the group have built
or considered building a coffin. I like to think I have a few years
left in me, but I thought it might be a good project, particularly
considering the horrendous prices charged by undertakers for a simple
wooden box, often with some appalling faux brass fitting, more worthy
of a cheap kids football trophy.
Any guidance on rules, regulations and other considerations would be
gratefully received.

I think there's a lot more than simply the wooden box. There's the
cost of collecting the corpse, laying it out (perhaps embalming it),
the shroud, transport, standing by during a service at a church and/or
crematorium, negotiations with graveyard owners if the body's to be
interred, and so on.

Of course; but a few months ago IIRC the itemised cost of MIL's coffin -
the cheapest on offer (and no, it wasn't me who chose it!) - was north
of 400 quid. And just veneered chipboard or something. Total bill was
IIRC 2400 quid, and I'm sure that had I produced a DIY coffin, then the
400 would not have been chargeable.

Especially for cremations, I don't know[1] why you can't just rent a
coffin TBH, by far the most eco-friendly and economical route. You
could have a flashy, polished outer which is used for the funeral, then
when Hector the Rector presses the button at the service and the coffin
slides away or the curtain closes, the crem staff out the back whip out
the deceased, enclosed in a sealed body-bag or cardboard liner or
something, and pop him/her into the oven. Outer goes back to the
undertaker for the next punter.

Just looking at the link in Adam Wadsworth's reply, I see someone's
already pipped me to the post on yet another or my business innovations...!

http://www.funeralsearch.co.uk/coffin-cover.php

David

On Wed, 19 Aug 2009 01:13:22 -0700 (PDT), Tim Decker
wrote:

Any guidance on rules, regulations and other considerations would be
gratefully received.
It will have to go on my list of projects to be done, somewhere after,
the window renovation, the pizza oven, the new bedroom cupboards, the
additional bathroom etc.

All sounds a bit OTT for a coffin. ;-)

Derek

"Lobster" wrote in message
...
Lobster wrote:
Frank Erskine wrote:
On Wed, 19 Aug 2009 01:13:22 -0700 (PDT), Tim Decker
had this to say:

I am interested whether any of the keen DIYers on the group have built
or considered building a coffin. I like to think I have a few years
left in me, but I thought it might be a good project, particularly
considering the horrendous prices charged by undertakers for a simple
wooden box, often with some appalling faux brass fitting, more worthy
of a cheap kids football trophy.
Any guidance on rules, regulations and other considerations would be
gratefully received.

I think there's a lot more than simply the wooden box. There's the
cost of collecting the corpse, laying it out (perhaps embalming it),
the shroud, transport, standing by during a service at a church and/or
crematorium, negotiations with graveyard owners if the body's to be
interred, and so on.

Of course; but a few months ago IIRC the itemised cost of MIL's coffin -
the cheapest on offer (and no, it wasn't me who chose it!) - was north of
400 quid. And just veneered chipboard or something. Total bill was IIRC
2400 quid, and I'm sure that had I produced a DIY coffin, then the 400
would not have been chargeable.

Especially for cremations, I don't know[1] why you can't just rent a
coffin TBH, by far the most eco-friendly and economical route. You could
have a flashy, polished outer which is used for the funeral, then when
Hector the Rector presses the button at the service and the coffin slides
away or the curtain closes, the crem staff out the back whip out the
deceased, enclosed in a sealed body-bag or cardboard liner or something,
and pop him/her into the oven. Outer goes back to the undertaker for the
next punter.

Just looking at the link in Adam Wadsworth's reply, I see someone's
already pipped me to the post on yet another or my business
innovations...!

http://www.funeralsearch.co.uk/coffin-cover.php

David

As an aside

Can anyone remember the last time that they saw an open coffin?

It is something that I have not seen for many years.

Adam

On Wed, 19 Aug 2009 17:23:04 +0000, ARWadsworth wrote:
As an aside

Can anyone remember the last time that they saw an open coffin?

Hmm, about 2 years ago. Maybe it's more common on this side of the
Atlantic...

In message , Lobster
writes
Lobster wrote:
Frank Erskine wrote:
On Wed, 19 Aug 2009 01:13:22 -0700 (PDT), Tim Decker
had this to say:

I am interested whether any of the keen DIYers on the group have built
or considered building a coffin. I like to think I have a few years
left in me, but I thought it might be a good project, particularly
considering the horrendous prices charged by undertakers for a simple
wooden box, often with some appalling faux brass fitting, more worthy
of a cheap kids football trophy.
Any guidance on rules, regulations and other considerations would be
gratefully received.

I think there's a lot more than simply the wooden box. There's the
cost of collecting the corpse, laying it out (perhaps embalming it),
the shroud, transport, standing by during a service at a church and/or
crematorium, negotiations with graveyard owners if the body's to be
interred, and so on.
Of course; but a few months ago IIRC the itemised cost of MIL's
coffin - the cheapest on offer (and no, it wasn't me who chose it!) -
was north of 400 quid. And just veneered chipboard or something.
Total bill was IIRC 2400 quid, and I'm sure that had I produced a DIY
coffin, then the 400 would not have been chargeable.
Especially for cremations, I don't know[1] why you can't just rent a
coffin TBH, by far the most eco-friendly and economical route. You
could have a flashy, polished outer which is used for the funeral,
then when Hector the Rector presses the button at the service and the
coffin slides away or the curtain closes, the crem staff out the back
whip out the deceased, enclosed in a sealed body-bag or cardboard
liner or something, and pop him/her into the oven. Outer goes back to
the undertaker for the next punter.

Just looking at the link in Adam Wadsworth's reply, I see someone's
already pipped me to the post on yet another or my business
innovations...!

Been around for years

At school (just a few years back), I had a friend whose father was the
MD of Rigid Containers

http://www.rigid.co.uk/

He always said that he was going to be interred in a cardboard coffin

--
geoff

In message
,
Owain writes
On 19 Aug, 10:57, RubberBiker wrote:
Be sure to make it *look* like a diy-project coffin.
White or "wood effect" melamine finish.

No! Black ash contiboard!!

And an angle grinder displayed on the lid.

Small plexiglass panel in the toe end with a digital photoframe inside

Alarm system which you can activate, just in case you're not actually
dead


--
geoff

"geoff" wrote in message
...
In message
, Owain
writes
On 19 Aug, 10:57, RubberBiker wrote:
Be sure to make it *look* like a diy-project coffin.
White or "wood effect" melamine finish.

No! Black ash contiboard!!

And an angle grinder displayed on the lid.

Small plexiglass panel in the toe end with a digital photoframe inside

Alarm system which you can activate, just in case you're not actually dead


--
geoff

You need a zombie proof alarm, just in case.

Adam

Tim Decker wrote:
I am interested whether any of the keen DIYers on the group have built
or considered building a coffin.

I'm surprised IKEA haven't made a flat pack coffin at a bargain price.
After all, if 1 in 10 are cocieved in an IKEA bed.........



--
Dave - The Medway Handyman
www.medwayhandyman.co.uk

I'm surprised IKEA haven't made a flat pack coffin...

But what would they call it?

"ARWadsworth" wrote in message
om...

"Lobster" wrote in message
...
Frank Erskine wrote:
On Wed, 19 Aug 2009 01:13:22 -0700 (PDT), Tim Decker
had this to say:

I am interested whether any of the keen DIYers on the group have built
or considered building a coffin. I like to think I have a few years
left in me, but I thought it might be a good project, particularly
considering the horrendous prices charged by undertakers for a simple
wooden box, often with some appalling faux brass fitting, more worthy
of a cheap kids football trophy.
Any guidance on rules, regulations and other considerations would be
gratefully received.

I think there's a lot more than simply the wooden box. There's the
cost of collecting the corpse, laying it out (perhaps embalming it),
the shroud, transport, standing by during a service at a church and/or
crematorium, negotiations with graveyard owners if the body's to be
interred, and so on.

Of course; but a few months ago IIRC the itemised cost of MIL's coffin -
the cheapest on offer (and no, it wasn't me who chose it!) - was north of
400 quid. And just veneered chipboard or something. Total bill was IIRC
2400 quid, and I'm sure that had I produced a DIY coffin, then the 400
would not have been chargeable.

Especially for cremations, I don't know[1] why you can't just rent a
coffin TBH, by far the most eco-friendly and economical route. You could
have a flashy, polished outer which is used for the funeral, then when
Hector the Rector presses the button at the service and the coffin slides
away or the curtain closes, the crem staff out the back whip out the
deceased, enclosed in a sealed body-bag or cardboard liner or something,
and pop him/her into the oven. Outer goes back to the undertaker for the
next punter.

David

[1] Could it be related to the exhorbitant purchase price of a coffin,I
wonder?

I do not think that these can be beaten for value

http://www.funeralsearch.co.uk/cardboard-coffins.php#a3

It would do me.

A minister friend has experience of a funeral turning into very distressing
event for family and friends as a result of a cardboard coffin failure. I
know funerals are distressing anyway, but the body falling out of the coffin
made the whole thing much worse for everyone.

"RubberBiker" wrote in message
...

I'm surprised IKEA haven't made a flat pack coffin...

But what would they call it?

grubb

In message ,
ARWadsworth writes

"Lobster" wrote in message
...
Lobster wrote:
Frank Erskine wrote:
On Wed, 19 Aug 2009 01:13:22 -0700 (PDT), Tim Decker
had this to say:

I am interested whether any of the keen DIYers on the group have built
or considered building a coffin. I like to think I have a few years
left in me, but I thought it might be a good project, particularly
considering the horrendous prices charged by undertakers for a simple
wooden box, often with some appalling faux brass fitting, more worthy
of a cheap kids football trophy.
Any guidance on rules, regulations and other considerations would be
gratefully received.

I think there's a lot more than simply the wooden box. There's the
cost of collecting the corpse, laying it out (perhaps embalming it),
the shroud, transport, standing by during a service at a church and/or
crematorium, negotiations with graveyard owners if the body's to be
interred, and so on.

Of course; but a few months ago IIRC the itemised cost of MIL's
coffin - the cheapest on offer (and no, it wasn't me who chose it!)
- was north of 400 quid. And just veneered chipboard or something.
Total bill was IIRC 2400 quid, and I'm sure that had I produced a
DIY coffin, then the 400 would not have been chargeable.

Especially for cremations, I don't know[1] why you can't just rent a
coffin TBH, by far the most eco-friendly and economical route. You
could have a flashy, polished outer which is used for the funeral,
then when Hector the Rector presses the button at the service and
the coffin slides away or the curtain closes, the crem staff out the
back whip out the deceased, enclosed in a sealed body-bag or
cardboard liner or something, and pop him/her into the oven. Outer
goes back to the undertaker for the next punter.

Just looking at the link in Adam Wadsworth's reply, I see someone's
already pipped me to the post on yet another or my business
innovations...!

http://www.funeralsearch.co.uk/coffin-cover.php

David

As an aside

Can anyone remember the last time that they saw an open coffin?

It is something that I have not seen for many years.

Yes- I "viewed" my father last year before the cremation


--
geoff

RubberBiker wrote:
I'm surprised IKEA haven't made a flat pack coffin...

But what would they call it?

'ASTIFF' ?

'BRAUNBRED' ?

'KROAKED' ?


--
Dave - The Medway Handyman
www.medwayhandyman.co.uk

On Wed, 19 Aug 2009 09:36:01 -0700 (PDT), jgharston said:

I'm sure there's a way through the regulations to allow an outdoor
cremation. After all, the Vikings do it.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/7953581.stm

| Monday, 23 March 2009

| The High Court is being asked to rule on the legality of open air
| funeral pyres ...

--
Alan J. Wylie http://www.wylie.me.uk/

ARWadsworth coughed up some electrons that declared:

As an aside

Can anyone remember the last time that they saw an open coffin?

It is something that I have not seen for many years.

Adam

When my father died, I took my 4 year old daughter to the undertakers to
say "goodbye Grandad", courtesy of an open coffin.

Not to everyone's taste, but it was a good thing in our case and she handled
it very well. My son was unlikley to handle it well, being much younger, so
he didn't go.

Cheers

Tim