According to Leno,

Guy in handcuffs, escaped from cops, ran into Home Depot, and asked
for bolt cutters.

Amazing, Leno said, actually found someone to help him.

Well he couldn't very well spend any money with his arms cuffed behind
his back.

On May 10, 11:44*pm, mm wrote:
According to Leno,

Guy in handcuffs, escaped from cops, ran into Home Depot, and asked
for bolt cutters.

Amazing, Leno said, actually found someone to help him.

Not hard to believe at all. Just tell them a story, like your idiot
friend is laughing his ass off about how stupid you were to trust him
to put the cuffs on you, or that your girlfriend lost the key. No
problem.

R

"mm" wrote in message
...
According to Leno,

Guy in handcuffs, escaped from cops, ran into Home Depot, and asked
for bolt cutters.

Amazing, Leno said, actually found someone to help him.

Except none of the help at HD would know where the bold cutters are.

Cheri

Why would anyone want to cut a bold?

Candid Camera did similar skit in NYC, decades ago. One
local fellow whipped out a cuff key and took em off of Allen
Funt.
--
Christopher A. Young
Learn more about Jesus
www.lds.org
..


"Cheri" wrote in message
...
"mm" wrote in message
...
According to Leno,

Guy in handcuffs, escaped from cops, ran into Home Depot,
and asked
for bolt cutters.

Amazing, Leno said, actually found someone to help him.

Except none of the help at HD would know where the bold
cutters are.

Cheri

"Cheri" wrote in :

"mm" wrote in message
...
According to Leno,

Guy in handcuffs, escaped from cops, ran into Home Depot, and asked
for bolt cutters.

Amazing, Leno said, actually found someone to help him.

Except none of the help at HD would know where the bold cutters are.

Cheri



The Leno writers missed out on that awesome punchline.

"Red Green" wrote in message
...
"Cheri" wrote in :

"mm" wrote in message
...
According to Leno,

Guy in handcuffs, escaped from cops, ran into Home Depot, and asked
for bolt cutters.

Amazing, Leno said, actually found someone to help him.

Except none of the help at HD would know where the bold cutters are.

Cheri



The Leno writers missed out on that awesome punchline.

The Leno writers miss out on a lot, like writing anything that's halfway
funny for starters.

Cheri

"Cheri" wrote in message
...
"Red Green" wrote in message
...
"Cheri" wrote in :

"mm" wrote in message
...
According to Leno,

Guy in handcuffs, escaped from cops, ran into Home Depot, and asked
for bolt cutters.

Amazing, Leno said, actually found someone to help him.

Except none of the help at HD would know where the bold cutters are.

Cheri



The Leno writers missed out on that awesome punchline.

The Leno writers miss out on a lot, like writing anything that's halfway
funny for starters.

Cheri



I agree. We were diehard Tonight Show fans for decades, including Leno but
we stopped enjoying him a couple of years ago. I don't get Letterman, so
it's now Jimmy Kemmel for us, off the DVR the next day. Maybe once every 3
weeks he might even have a group performing that we have actually heard of.
Yea, we're in our 50s.

"Joe J" wrote in message
...

"Cheri" wrote in message
...
"Red Green" wrote in message
...
"Cheri" wrote in :

"mm" wrote in message
...
According to Leno,

Guy in handcuffs, escaped from cops, ran into Home Depot, and asked
for bolt cutters.

Amazing, Leno said, actually found someone to help him.

Except none of the help at HD would know where the bold cutters are.

Cheri



The Leno writers missed out on that awesome punchline.

The Leno writers miss out on a lot, like writing anything that's halfway
funny for starters.

Cheri



I agree. We were diehard Tonight Show fans for decades, including Leno
but we stopped enjoying him a couple of years ago. I don't get Letterman,
so it's now Jimmy Kemmel for us, off the DVR the next day. Maybe once
every 3 weeks he might even have a group performing that we have actually
heard of. Yea, we're in our 50s.

You know you're old when you'd rather go to sleep than watch late night.
All of them have become political mouth puppets for the liberals, and are
b-o-r-i-n-g.

Steve

On May 11, 11:44*am, "Steve B" wrote:
"Joe J" wrote in message

...







"Cheri" wrote in message
...
"Red Green" wrote in message
...
"Cheri" wrote :

"mm" wrote in message
m...
According to Leno,

Guy in handcuffs, escaped from cops, ran into Home Depot, and asked
for bolt cutters.

Amazing, Leno said, actually found someone to help him.

Except none of the help at HD would know where the bold cutters are.

Cheri

The Leno writers missed out on that awesome punchline.

The Leno writers miss out on a lot, like writing anything that's halfway
funny for starters.

Cheri

I agree. *We were diehard Tonight Show fans for decades, including Leno
but we stopped enjoying him a couple of years ago. *I don't get Letterman,
so it's now Jimmy Kemmel for us, off the DVR the next day. *Maybe once
every 3 weeks he might even have a group performing that we have actually
heard of. Yea, we're in our 50s.

You know you're old when you'd rather go to sleep than watch late night.
All of them have become political mouth puppets for the liberals, and are
b-o-r-i-n-g.

Steve- Hide quoted text -

- Show quoted text -

I go back to Jack Parr days. He did a lot of his own writing (not
righting) and was very unpredictable. He also had a group of regulars
that made the show familiar but not too rigid.

On May 11, 1:01*am, "Cheri" wrote:
"mm" wrote in message

...

According to Leno,

Guy in handcuffs, escaped from cops, ran into Home Depot, and asked
for bolt cutters.

Amazing, Leno said, actually found someone to help him.

Except none of the help at HD would know where the bold cutters are.

Cheri

Actually it's more likely that they wouldn't *what* bolt cutters are.

"hr(bob) " wrote in message
...
On May 11, 11:44 am, "Steve B" wrote:
"Joe J" wrote in message

...







"Cheri" wrote in message
...
"Red Green" wrote in message
...
"Cheri" wrote
:

"mm" wrote in message
m...
According to Leno,

Guy in handcuffs, escaped from cops, ran into Home Depot, and asked
for bolt cutters.

Amazing, Leno said, actually found someone to help him.

Except none of the help at HD would know where the bold cutters are.

Cheri

The Leno writers missed out on that awesome punchline.

The Leno writers miss out on a lot, like writing anything that's
halfway
funny for starters.

Cheri

I agree. We were diehard Tonight Show fans for decades, including Leno
but we stopped enjoying him a couple of years ago. I don't get
Letterman,
so it's now Jimmy Kemmel for us, off the DVR the next day. Maybe once
every 3 weeks he might even have a group performing that we have
actually
heard of. Yea, we're in our 50s.

You know you're old when you'd rather go to sleep than watch late night.
All of them have become political mouth puppets for the liberals, and are
b-o-r-i-n-g.

Steve- Hide quoted text -

- Show quoted text -

I go back to Jack Parr days. He did a lot of his own writing (not
righting) and was very unpredictable. He also had a group of regulars
that made the show familiar but not too rigid.

Reply:

Jack and his ilk were just funny men with a great sense of timing. Sid
Ceasar, Imogene Coca, Ernie Kovacs, you name 'em. They kept up with current
events, saw the humor and irony in them, but had a Joe Everyman delivery.
They were probably paid very well for that time, but nothing like the
millions and millions today. People could relate to them. I guess I'm
getting old, and I don't mind that a bit. A lot of this new "stuff", what
they think is comedy, and the music has me asking questions my own Daddy
asked me.

WHADDYA LISTENING TO THAT **** FOR?

Growing old isn't for pussies.

The good old days weren't as convenient and easy as they are today in many
facets, but I firmly believe the quality of life was a lot more. We had
lawn darts and spud guns and could put our Confederate flag out, and a
drive-by was when your old man was too cheap to stop at the DRIVE-IN! Kids
went behind the gym or bleachers after school to settle things, and they
were settled. If someone pulled a weapon, guys from their own crew would
beat the crap out of them. It was a fair fight, win or lose, or at least
for the respect of the other person.

We had punks and gangs and fights, but I never in my wildest dreams would
have ever imagined that we would decay this far this fast.

Same with comedy. Lots of good stuff still out there, but I just don't get
some of it.

BTW, have you heard of the poetry reading coming up at the White House?
Would that have flown in the sixties? Defiling a sacred place is what it
is.

Steve

"DerbyDad03" wrote in message
...
On May 11, 1:01 am, "Cheri" wrote:
"mm" wrote in message

...

According to Leno,

Guy in handcuffs, escaped from cops, ran into Home Depot, and asked
for bolt cutters.

Amazing, Leno said, actually found someone to help him.

Except none of the help at HD would know where the bold cutters are.

Cheri

Actually it's more likely that they wouldn't *what* bolt cutters are.

reply:

Now that's even closer to the truth.

Steve

"Steve B" wrote in
:


"hr(bob) " wrote in message
.
.. On May 11, 11:44 am, "Steve B" wrote:
"Joe J" wrote in message

...







"Cheri" wrote in message
...
"Red Green" wrote in message
...
"Cheri" wrote
:

"mm" wrote in message
m...
According to Leno,

Guy in handcuffs, escaped from cops, ran into Home Depot, and
asked for bolt cutters.

Amazing, Leno said, actually found someone to help him.

Except none of the help at HD would know where the bold cutters
are.

Cheri

The Leno writers missed out on that awesome punchline.

The Leno writers miss out on a lot, like writing anything that's
halfway
funny for starters.

Cheri

I agree. We were diehard Tonight Show fans for decades, including
Leno but we stopped enjoying him a couple of years ago. I don't get
Letterman,
so it's now Jimmy Kemmel for us, off the DVR the next day. Maybe
once every 3 weeks he might even have a group performing that we
have actually
heard of. Yea, we're in our 50s.

You know you're old when you'd rather go to sleep than watch late
night. All of them have become political mouth puppets for the
liberals, and are b-o-r-i-n-g.

Steve- Hide quoted text -

- Show quoted text -

I go back to Jack Parr days. He did a lot of his own writing (not
righting) and was very unpredictable. He also had a group of regulars
that made the show familiar but not too rigid.

Reply:

Jack and his ilk were just funny men with a great sense of timing.
Sid Ceasar, Imogene Coca, Ernie Kovacs, you name 'em. They kept up
with current events, saw the humor and irony in them, but had a Joe
Everyman delivery. They were probably paid very well for that time,
but nothing like the millions and millions today. People could relate
to them. I guess I'm getting old, and I don't mind that a bit. A lot
of this new "stuff", what they think is comedy, and the music has me
asking questions my own Daddy asked me.

WHADDYA LISTENING TO THAT **** FOR?

Growing old isn't for pussies.

The good old days weren't as convenient and easy as they are today in
many facets, but I firmly believe the quality of life was a lot more.
We had lawn darts and spud guns and could put our Confederate flag
out, and a drive-by was when your old man was too cheap to stop at the
DRIVE-IN! Kids went behind the gym or bleachers after school to
settle things, and they were settled. If someone pulled a weapon,
guys from their own crew would beat the crap out of them. It was a
fair fight, win or lose, or at least for the respect of the other
person.

Today everybody is Ohfeeeeended and needs counseling. Bunch of pussies.


We had punks and gangs and fights, but I never in my wildest dreams
would have ever imagined that we would decay this far this fast.

Same with comedy. Lots of good stuff still out there, but I just
don't get some of it.

BTW, have you heard of the poetry reading coming up at the White
House? Would that have flown in the sixties? Defiling a sacred place
is what it is.

Steve

hr(bob) wrote the following:
On May 11, 11:44 am, "Steve B" wrote:

"Joe J" wrote in message

...








"Cheri" wrote in message
...

"Red Green" wrote in message
...

"Cheri" wrote :

"mm" wrote in message
...

According to Leno,

Guy in handcuffs, escaped from cops, ran into Home Depot, and asked
for bolt cutters.

Amazing, Leno said, actually found someone to help him.

Except none of the help at HD would know where the bold cutters are.

Cheri

The Leno writers missed out on that awesome punchline.

The Leno writers miss out on a lot, like writing anything that's halfway
funny for starters.

Cheri

I agree. We were diehard Tonight Show fans for decades, including Leno
but we stopped enjoying him a couple of years ago. I don't get Letterman,
so it's now Jimmy Kemmel for us, off the DVR the next day. Maybe once
every 3 weeks he might even have a group performing that we have actually
heard of. Yea, we're in our 50s.

You know you're old when you'd rather go to sleep than watch late night.
All of them have become political mouth puppets for the liberals, and are
b-o-r-i-n-g.

Steve- Hide quoted text -

- Show quoted text -


I go back to Jack Parr days. He did a lot of his own writing (not
righting) and was very unpredictable. He also had a group of regulars
that made the show familiar but not too rigid.


Me too, but there wasn't much else on. It was either that or the "Late
Show" on CBS which had old movies. I still remember the "Syncopated
Clock' theme song.
The Late show was followed by the national anthem and then the test pattern.
Johnny Carson was the best and can never be surpassed.
I don't like Conan O'Brien and have never watched his show. His promos
are not funny and he looks like a jerk.
George Lopez should go back to stand up comedy. If they ever make a
movie about Gaddafi, he should play the part.

--

Bill
In Hamptonburgh, NY
In the original Orange County. Est. 1683
To email, remove the double zeroes after @

On May 12, 11:46*am, willshak wrote:
hr(bob) wrote the following:





On May 11, 11:44 am, "Steve B" wrote:

"Joe J" wrote in message

...

"Cheri" wrote in message
...

"Red Green" wrote in message
. ..

"Cheri" wrote :

"mm" wrote in message
news:gd1ks6hbeask7risfc66tf70je1f73456n@4ax. com...

According to Leno,

Guy in handcuffs, escaped from cops, ran into Home Depot, and asked
for bolt cutters.

Amazing, Leno said, actually found someone to help him.

Except none of the help at HD would know where the bold cutters are.

Cheri

The Leno writers missed out on that awesome punchline.

The Leno writers miss out on a lot, like writing anything that's halfway
funny for starters.

Cheri

I agree. *We were diehard Tonight Show fans for decades, including Leno
but we stopped enjoying him a couple of years ago. *I don't get Letterman,
so it's now Jimmy Kemmel for us, off the DVR the next day. *Maybe once
every 3 weeks he might even have a group performing that we have actually
heard of. Yea, we're in our 50s.

You know you're old when you'd rather go to sleep than watch late night.

On Wed, 11 May 2011 11:34:36 -0700 (PDT), "hr(bob) "
wrote:

On May 11, 11:44*am, "Steve B" wrote:
"Joe J" wrote in message

...







"Cheri" wrote in message
...
"Red Green" wrote in message
...
"Cheri" wrote :

"mm" wrote in message
m...
According to Leno,

Guy in handcuffs, escaped from cops, ran into Home Depot, and asked
for bolt cutters.

Amazing, Leno said, actually found someone to help him.

Except none of the help at HD would know where the bold cutters are.

Cheri

The Leno writers missed out on that awesome punchline.

The Leno writers miss out on a lot, like writing anything that's halfway
funny for starters.

Cheri

I agree. *We were diehard Tonight Show fans for decades, including Leno
but we stopped enjoying him a couple of years ago. *I don't get Letterman,
so it's now Jimmy Kemmel for us, off the DVR the next day. *Maybe once
every 3 weeks he might even have a group performing that we have actually
heard of. Yea, we're in our 50s.

You know you're old when you'd rather go to sleep than watch late night.
All of them have become political mouth puppets for the liberals, and are
b-o-r-i-n-g.

Steve- Hide quoted text -

- Show quoted text -

I go back to Jack Parr days. He did a lot of his own writing (not
righting) and was very unpredictable. He also had a group of regulars
that made the show familiar but not too rigid.

Jack Parr was my favorite, but maybe that's because I was 10 or 14 and
hadn't seen anything like that before. I may have gotten
disinterested or even disgusted with Leno the same time Joe stopped
enjoying him, about a couple years ago, because his monologues got
vulgar, more sexual, things I wouldn't let my little kids watch if I
had little kids and they were up that late for some reason, or even my
teenagers if I had teenagers. Despite the hour, I thought it was
supposed to be a family show, and even if not, he managed to go
decades without telling jokes like he does now and he should have kept
at it.

On 5/12/2011 10:46 AM, willshak wrote:
hr(bob) wrote the following:
On May 11, 11:44 am, "Steve B" wrote:
"Joe J" wrote in message

...







"Cheri" wrote in message
...
"Red Green" wrote in message
...
"Cheri" wrote
:
"mm" wrote in message
...
According to Leno,
Guy in handcuffs, escaped from cops, ran into
Home Depot, and asked
for bolt cutters.
Amazing, Leno said, actually found someone to
help him.
Except none of the help at HD would know where the bold cutters
are.
Cheri
The Leno writers missed out on that awesome punchline.
The Leno writers miss out on a lot, like writing anything that's
halfway
funny for starters.
Cheri
I agree. We were diehard Tonight Show fans for decades, including
Leno
but we stopped enjoying him a couple of years ago. I don't get
Letterman,
so it's now Jimmy Kemmel for us, off the DVR the next day. Maybe once
every 3 weeks he might even have a group performing that we have
actually
heard of. Yea, we're in our 50s.
You know you're old when you'd rather go to sleep than watch late
night.
All of them have become political mouth puppets for the liberals,
and are
b-o-r-i-n-g.

Steve- Hide quoted text -

- Show quoted text -

I go back to Jack Parr days. He did a lot of his own writing (not
righting) and was very unpredictable. He also had a group of regulars
that made the show familiar but not too rigid.

Me too, but there wasn't much else on. It was either that or the "Late
Show" on CBS which had old movies. I still remember the "Syncopated
Clock' theme song.
The Late show was followed by the national anthem and then the test
pattern.
Johnny Carson was the best and can never be surpassed.
I don't like Conan O'Brien and have never watched his show. His promos
are not funny and he looks like a jerk.
George Lopez should go back to stand up comedy. If they ever make a
movie about Gaddafi, he should play the part.

Conan is funny.

Jim

"mm" wrote in message ...

According to Leno,

Guy in handcuffs, escaped from cops, ran into Home Depot, and asked
for bolt cutters.

Amazing, Leno said, actually found someone to help him.

The HD employee probably felt sympathetic towards someone with a similar
background to his own, i.e. a grade-school education and a criminal record.

MM, change your posting settings. You are posting in a text that causes a lot of people's computers to notify them that they need to change the language settings, and a lot of people aren't reading what you post. Go to Format and click HTML.

Steve

In article , "Steve B" wrote:
This is a multi-part message in MIME format.

------=_NextPart_000_000F_01CC11A7.5A87C680
Content-Type: text/plain;
charset="ISO-8859-8"
Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable

MM, change your posting settings. You are posting in a text that causes =
a lot of people's computers to notify them that they need to change the =
language settings, and a lot of people aren't reading what you post. Go =
to Format and click HTML.

No, MM, *don't* do that.

Steve, *you* need to turn HTML *off* in *your* postings, because this is what
*you* are sending to the newsgroup:


Steve
------=_NextPart_000_000F_01CC11A7.5A87C680
Content-Type: text/html;
charset="ISO-8859-8"
Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable

!DOCTYPE HTML PUBLIC "-//W3C//DTD HTML 4.0 Transitional//EN"
HTMLHEAD
META content=3D"text/html; charset=3Diso-8859-8" =
http-equiv=3DContent-Type
META name=3DGENERATOR content=3D"MSHTML 8.00.6001.19046"
STYLE/STYLE
/HEAD
BODY
DIVFONT size=3D2MM, change your posting settings.  You are =
posting in=20
a text that causes a lot of people's computers to notify them that =
they=20
need to change the language settings, and a lot of people aren't reading =
what=20
you post.  Go to Format and click HTML./FONT/DIV
DIVFONT size=3D2/FONT /DIV
DIVFONT size=3D2Steve/FONT/DIV/BODY/HTML

------=_NextPart_000_000F_01CC11A7.5A87C680--

"Doug Miller" wrote in message
...
In article , "Steve B"
wrote:
This is a multi-part message in MIME format.

------=_NextPart_000_000F_01CC11A7.5A87C680
Content-Type: text/plain;
charset="ISO-8859-8"
Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable

MM, change your posting settings. You are posting in a text that causes =
a lot of people's computers to notify them that they need to change the =
language settings, and a lot of people aren't reading what you post. Go =
to Format and click HTML.

No, MM, *don't* do that.

Steve, *you* need to turn HTML *off* in *your* postings, because this is
what
*you* are sending to the newsgroup:


Steve
------=_NextPart_000_000F_01CC11A7.5A87C680
Content-Type: text/html;
charset="ISO-8859-8"
Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable

!DOCTYPE HTML PUBLIC "-//W3C//DTD HTML 4.0 Transitional//EN"
HTMLHEAD
META content=3D"text/html; charset=3Diso-8859-8" =
http-equiv=3DContent-Type
META name=3DGENERATOR content=3D"MSHTML 8.00.6001.19046"
STYLE/STYLE
/HEAD
BODY
DIVFONT size=3D2MM, change your posting settings.  You are =
posting in=20
a text that causes a lot of people's computers to notify them that =
they=20
need to change the language settings, and a lot of people aren't reading =
what=20
you post.  Go to Format and click HTML./FONT/DIV
DIVFONT size=3D2/FONT /DIV
DIVFONT size=3D2Steve/FONT/DIV/BODY/HTML

------=_NextPart_000_000F_01CC11A7.5A87C680--

One is never as smart as they think they are.............

did I get it turned off?

MM, please adjust your settings, too .........

duh...................

never mind.

Steve

Steve B wrote:
MM, change your posting settings. You are posting in a text that causes
a lot of people's computers to notify them that they need to change the
language settings, and a lot of people aren't reading what you post. Go
to Format and click HTML.

Steve

Ah, looks like to me that you are the one with the problem with that
18-24 font.

In article , "Steve B" wrote:

"Doug Miller" wrote in message
...
In article , "Steve B"
wrote:
This is a multi-part message in MIME format.

------=_NextPart_000_000F_01CC11A7.5A87C680
Content-Type: text/plain;
charset="ISO-8859-8"
Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable

MM, change your posting settings. You are posting in a text that causes =
a lot of people's computers to notify them that they need to change the =
language settings, and a lot of people aren't reading what you post. Go =
to Format and click HTML.

No, MM, *don't* do that.

Steve, *you* need to turn HTML *off* in *your* postings, because this is
what
*you* are sending to the newsgroup:


Steve
------=_NextPart_000_000F_01CC11A7.5A87C680
Content-Type: text/html;
charset="ISO-8859-8"
Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable

!DOCTYPE HTML PUBLIC "-//W3C//DTD HTML 4.0 Transitional//EN"
HTMLHEAD
META content=3D"text/html; charset=3Diso-8859-8" =
http-equiv=3DContent-Type
META name=3DGENERATOR content=3D"MSHTML 8.00.6001.19046"
STYLE/STYLE
/HEAD
BODY
DIVFONT size=3D2MM, change your posting settings.  You are =
posting in=20
a text that causes a lot of people's computers to notify them that =
they=20
need to change the language settings, and a lot of people aren't reading =
what=20
you post.  Go to Format and click HTML./FONT/DIV
DIVFONT size=3D2/FONT /DIV
DIVFONT size=3D2Steve/FONT/DIV/BODY/HTML

------=_NextPart_000_000F_01CC11A7.5A87C680--

One is never as smart as they think they are.............

did I get it turned off?

Yes.

MM, please adjust your settings, too .........

duh...................

never mind.

Steve