In article .com, "Klassixx" wrote:
Hi

I lost the use of my anus in a freak yachting accident.

I wish to fashion a replacement one out of metal, so this never happens
again.

Which metal has the required strength and durability?

Stupidium ... which you seem to have in abundance



Bruce


-------------------------------------
The power of accurate observation is commonly called cynicism by those who have not got it.
- George Bernard Shaw
Cynic, n: a blackguard whose faulty vision sees things as they are, not as they ought to be.
- Ambrose Bierce

Caution ===== followups may have been changed to relevant groups
(if there were any)

Hi

I lost the use of my anus in a freak yachting accident.

I wish to fashion a replacement one out of metal, so this never happens
again.

Which metal has the required strength and durability?

" I lost the use of my anus in a freak yachting accident.
How then was your head spared?

Klassixx wrote:
Hi

I lost the use of my anus in a freak yachting accident.

I wish to fashion a replacement one out of metal, so this never happens
again.

Which metal has the required strength and durability?

Are you referring to your "rudder"?

Provide some more details (size,
make and model, fiberglass or
wood hull, ...).


Atty (Time to step the mast, mates :-)

NokNokMan wrote:
" I lost the use of my anus in a freak yachting accident.
How then was your head spared?

His colon softened the blow?

On 1 Jun 2005 16:30:31 -0700, "Klassixx" wrote:

Hi

I lost the use of my anus in a freak yachting accident.

I wish to fashion a replacement one out of metal, so this never happens
again.

Which metal has the required strength and durability?


You don't want metal, my friend.
What you need is a hamhock bushing.

Press fit it in the opening.

Just the thing for those tired a??holes

Paul K. Dickman

Klassixx wrote:
Hi

I lost the use of my anus in a freak yachting accident.

I wish to fashion a replacement one out of metal, so this never happens
again.

Which metal has the required strength and durability?

Freak yachting accident? Or were you careless with the vacuum cleaner
again

http://groups-beta.google.com/group/...78e47fb9a9817e

"Klassixx"
Hi

I lost the use of my anus in a freak yachting accident.



-------
There do be a classic workman's compensation case... where in some poor soul was
seated on da throne in a compression chamber when some one on the outside open
valve.... his guts being on the high pressure were sucked out into the bowl! They had
to lock a surgeon into the chamber and operate on him in situ - it would have taken
too long to decompress him.

And by-the-by .... next time in the library look up - Galambos, John T., and Hersh, Theodore
ATLAS OF THERAPEUTIC PROCTOLOGY



--
donlad j haarmann
------------------------------
Eventually we eliminated all flaws,
using the method of proof by
exhaustion - anyone, including us,
who tired to analyse the model
would get exhausted before they
understood it well enough to find
the flaws.

Frank Wilczek
Nature 428, 261 (2004)
On Savas Dimopoulos and his
work on supersymmetry.

Why not make it a whistle while you're at it? Impress your
friends, annoy your wife...

Juvenile humor about body parts is always so hilarious.

I have seen a photo of a large guy with ruptured ass with lots of
bloody guts hanging out in between his thighs (a hernia during
weightlifting attempt) - these are kinds of pictures you do not want to
know about. Yes, they saved the guy.

A workman compensation case that actualy that happened at our uni: A
dumb student (prospective highschool chemistry teacher!) flushed some
sodium metal waste left from solvent drying down the WC. It started
burning vigorously so student flushed. One floor below a physical
chemistry lecturer was reading newspaper while taking poo-poo. His
compensation form was about treating his posterior lacerations caused
by exploding toilette.

in article , Klassixx
at wrote on 6/1/05 4:30 PM:

Hi

I lost the use of my anus in a freak yachting accident.

I wish to fashion a replacement one out of metal, so this never happens
again.

Which metal has the required strength and durability?

I think that potassium would be about the best.

Bill

Idunno, platinum (or probably any other PGM) could be very interesting. I
mean, it catalyzes the reaction of hydrogen with oxygen, no? ;-)

Tim

--
"California is the breakfast state: fruits, nuts and flakes."
Website: http://webpages.charter.net/dawill/tmoranwms

"Klassixx" wrote in message
oups.com...
Hi

I lost the use of my anus in a freak yachting accident.

I wish to fashion a replacement one out of metal, so this never happens
again.

Which metal has the required strength and durability?

On 1 Jun 2005 21:08:32 -0700, "muha" wrote:

I have seen a photo of a large guy with ruptured ass with lots of
bloody guts hanging out in between his thighs (a hernia during
weightlifting attempt) - these are kinds of pictures you do not want to
know about. Yes, they saved the guy.

A workman compensation case that actualy that happened at our uni: A
dumb student (prospective highschool chemistry teacher!) flushed some
sodium metal waste left from solvent drying down the WC. It started
burning vigorously so student flushed. One floor below a physical
chemistry lecturer was reading newspaper while taking poo-poo. His
compensation form was about treating his posterior lacerations caused
by exploding toilette.


A person close to me dumped about half a pound of calcium carbide down
the 2nd floor boys room terlit and flushed it. Then..about 5 minutes
later..flushed down a cherry bomb with a very long fuse.

They were flipping manhole covers back over for several blocks around
for half the day. No one was hurt, but all the ceilings above sinks
and terlets had to be repainted.

Which reminds me of one of the funniest things Id ever seen.

I was about 13 and Hall Monitor. Rough job that one..making sure the
kids had passes for office visits, toilet visits and so forth.

The school had this tank/gun arraingement that blew a large blast of
compressed air down a toilet to clear a blockage. It had a hand pump
that made a sound that was quite recognizable. The boys and girls
restrooms were back to back with a utility closet/pipe room between
them

Mr Johansen came wandering down the hall carrying this beast and
entered the boys room. One of the "upper crust" cheer leader girls
entered the girls bath room. A total little bitch IRRC.

Sounds of the blaster being pumped..kathunkathunkathunkathunk for
several minutes followed by a long pause....then
KAWOOOSH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! as he fired it down a plugged toilet.

Instantly there was a loud blood curdling scream and the chippie
stumbles out of the girls bathroom, wearing only half her cheerleaders
costume..the upper half..soaking wet, hair now dripping and
bedraggled, ..bare assed and trailing a knicker wrapped around one
foot, making a screaming mad dash down the hallway, disappering down
the stairs.

Mr. Johanson stuck his head out the door..looked both ways..saw the
dripping wet footprints leading down the hallway and the disappearing
bare ass..looked at me, cracked a grin...and in his nearly
unintelligble scandinavian accent, mumbled something about it being
plugged up really good but clear now. Then he trotted off down the
hall in the opposite direction, whistling. When the princible and
other staff members showed up shortley thereafter..I was laughing so
hard my sides hurt and I was in tears.....neither Mr. Johanson or I
ever copped to the cause and it remained a great mystery for the rest
of the school year.

Gunner
"Pax Americana is a philosophy. Hardly an empire.
Making sure other people play nice and dont kill each other (and us)
off in job lots is hardly empire building, particularly when you give
them self determination under "play nice" rules.

Think of it as having your older brother knock the **** out of you
for torturing the cat." Gunner

wrote:

Klassixx wrote:

Hi

I lost the use of my anus in a freak yachting accident.

I wish to fashion a replacement one out of metal, so this never happens
again.

Which metal has the required strength and durability?


Freak yachting accident? Or were you careless with the vacuum cleaner
again

http://groups-beta.google.com/group/...78e47fb9a9817e

No, he sat on the model yacht he was playing with in the bath :-).

Chris