Today was a good day. Yesterday was too. That's two in a row, a
first. Both were mostly pain-free with some very enjoyable periods.

I had a scheduled physical today, which required me to fast for 12
hours before and abstain from alcohol for 48 hours preceeding. That
was a bit of a nuisance because I've enjoyed taking the edge off
about wine-thirty as my daughter describes end of afternoon, but no
big deal.

At the blood draw this morning, the young gal that stuck me thought
she remembered me. I said I'd been with Mary McCann the day this lab
technician had such trouble finding a vein and getting a draw because
of Mary's edema and low BP on Wednesday 16 March.

Oh, yeah, she remembered that very clearly. How was Mary doing? I
told her. She wrinkled, made me stand up so she could give me a
big hug, and it was a dandy.

That melted me right down for sure, but it was more cathartic than
painful.

Mary had that effect on caregivers: they all loved her within minutes
of first encounter. I think they liked me too. Even when things
were difficult, we never stopped being cheerful, encouraging the young
caregivers that we knew they were doing their level best and we
appreciated it, and the quietly playful (and sometimes spicy) banter
Mary and I so enjoyed never stopped until I left her to die in
Rochester. Her last words to me were "go home, Foreman". She was
smiling, comfortable in a hospital bed at Mayo, with a cloud of medics
trying to get an IV started in her nearly unfindable veins due to low
BP and significant edema. Her last word to me was "Foreman". She
loved me big, huge. I was rather fond of her as well.

I did not expect that she'd die anytime soon. The prognosis from
exam and lab results that day were very encouraging, thumbs up and
cheers from Dr. Chee at Mayo. The chemo was working, the incurable
amyloudosis was under control, she should start to heal as long as
chemo could keep the amyloidosis in remission.

Then she died. I felt like I'd been hit in the gut with a shovel when
I got that totally unexpected call.

The disease had caused more dmage to heart than the weakened body
could recover from by the time the amyloid dragon had been brought
to bay with chemo.

I miss that playful banter a lot every day. It was a significant part
of our everyday life. We loved amusing each other with the sometimes
pungent verbal ping pong that always resulted in laughter.

I wish the show had lasted longer, but it was wonderful fun for so
many good years.

I told the lab tech young woman that Mary was a very special friend.
She quietly said, "so were you."

She hugged me again before I left.

There are times that I'm glad I live in Minnesota. It's easy to feel
that way this time of year.

Tulops have emerged and bloomed in Mary's garden. I invited her two
best friends (other than me, of course) to come cut tulips for their
tables. Mary would like that a lot.

"Don Foreman" wrote in message
...
Today was a good day. Yesterday was too. That's two in a row, a
first. Both were mostly pain-free with some very enjoyable periods.

I had a scheduled physical today, which required me to fast for 12
hours before and abstain from alcohol for 48 hours preceeding. That
was a bit of a nuisance because I've enjoyed taking the edge off
about wine-thirty as my daughter describes end of afternoon, but no
big deal.

Might try a few more days without alcohol. Everybody is different, and I
enjoy my occasional libation. Sometimes two or three, but remember that
alcohol is a mild depressant. Personally I prefer to have a couple when I
am feeling good, want to relax, and don't have anywhere to go. Of course,
like I said, "Everybody is different."

Don Foreman wrote:

I miss that playful banter a lot every day. It was a significant part
of our everyday life. We loved amusing each other with the sometimes
pungent verbal ping pong that always resulted in laughter.

Heck Don, I still miss my ex at times. There were good times along with the bad times
that lead to ending the marriage.

I hope you run into someone, when you are ready, that can replace some of what you have
lost.

Soldier on,

Wes

"Bob La Londe" wrote in message
...


"Don Foreman" wrote in message
...
Today was a good day. Yesterday was too. That's two in a row, a
first. Both were mostly pain-free with some very enjoyable
periods.

I had a scheduled physical today, which required me to fast for 12
hours before and abstain from alcohol for 48 hours preceeding.
That
was a bit of a nuisance because I've enjoyed taking the edge off
about wine-thirty as my daughter describes end of afternoon, but no
big deal.

Might try a few more days without alcohol. Everybody is different,
and I enjoy my occasional libation. Sometimes two or three, but
remember that alcohol is a mild depressant. Personally I prefer to
have a couple when I am feeling good, want to relax, and don't have
anywhere to go. Of course, like I said, "Everybody is different."

I went out drinking with friends last weekend and got really
plastered.
Knowing I was totally ****faced, I did something I have never done
before.
I took a bus home.

I arrived home safe and warm, which surprised the hell out of me as I
have never driven a bus before!

On Wed, 11 May 2011 17:35:15 -0400, Wes
wrote:

Don Foreman wrote:

I miss that playful banter a lot every day. It was a significant part
of our everyday life. We loved amusing each other with the sometimes
pungent verbal ping pong that always resulted in laughter.

Heck Don, I still miss my ex at times. There were good times along with the bad times
that lead to ending the marriage.

I hope you run into someone, when you are ready, that can replace some of what you have
lost.

Soldier on,

Wes

Soldiering on as well as a 69-year-old vet can soldier.

I won't even think about replacement until I've finished grieving
enough to be happily solo and not needy. That takes a while. Don't
know how long that might take but I'd guess most of a year. That's
not a pleasant prospect but nobody ever promised that life would
always be fun. I've low-crawled this sharp-rock terrain before,
unwillingly divorced at about age 40 with young family ripped from me.
Then Mary happened in my life. That was miracle 1.

I already know that no one could ever replace what I've lost. That's
impossible because the relationship I've lost was crafted by both of
us over most of three decades. Well, maybe two decades because we
finally married in 2001 and our lives since then were shared joy every
single day. It really was that good. We made it so as job 1.

I presuumably will eventually get thru the grieving process to where
I'm ready and able to build anew if opportunity should occur. I must
get comfortable living alone in my own skin before I even think about
new relationships. New will not be replacement, it will be new and
different. Probably strange at first, a bit scarey for both parties,
and it may not work for one or the other of us for whatever reason,
but good **** does happen now and then. Hope is not a strategy but
openness to change sometimes works well.

I have had two miracles in my lifetime. The first was when I found
and won Mary after most of a year of healing from a divorce I didn't
want but was inevitable. The second was when I survived May of
2008. Several medical professionals asked me if I had any idea how
lucky I was to survive that.

There have been recent days when I have doubted how lucky I was to
survive that, but I did get another very happy couple of years with
Mary before she checked out way too soon.

Soldiering on.

Tom Gardner wrote:
"Bob La Londe" wrote in message
"Don Foreman" wrote in message

Today was a good day. Yesterday was too. That's two in a row, a
first. Both were mostly pain-free with some very enjoyable
periods.

I had a scheduled physical today, which required me to fast for 12
hours before and abstain from alcohol for 48 hours preceeding.
That
was a bit of a nuisance because I've enjoyed taking the edge off
about wine-thirty as my daughter describes end of afternoon, but no
big deal.

Might try a few more days without alcohol. Everybody is different,
and I enjoy my occasional libation. Sometimes two or three, but
remember that alcohol is a mild depressant. Personally I prefer to
have a couple when I am feeling good, want to relax, and don't have
anywhere to go. Of course, like I said, "Everybody is different."

I went out drinking with friends last weekend and got really
plastered.
Knowing I was totally ****faced, I did something I have never done
before.
I took a bus home.

I arrived home safe and warm, which surprised the hell out of me as I
have never driven a bus before!

Groan! ;-)

Rich