I was going to burn down some tree stumps aided by some petrol to get it going. Having a bottle of white spirit to hand I thought I'd use that instead of going to the garage to get petrol. It won't light!!!!

This is the exact product, and it says flammable on the side. But it bloody well isn't.

http://www.bartoline.co.uk/products_...vent%20Ra nge

--
http://petersparrots.com
http://petersphotos.com

Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat in Europe.

On 30/04/2012 15:44, Lieutenant Scott wrote:
I was going to burn down some tree stumps aided by some petrol to get it
going. Having a bottle of white spirit to hand I thought I'd use that
instead of going to the garage to get petrol. It won't light!!!!

This is the exact product, and it says flammable on the side. But it
bloody well isn't.

http://www.bartoline.co.uk/products_...vent%20Ra nge


Yes it will. Flash point for standard white spirit is around 31 - 54 C
(Wikipedia) so you can't light a pool of it, but it will burn on a wick,
like paraffin.

On Mon, 30 Apr 2012 16:43:51 +0100, newshound wrote:

On 30/04/2012 15:44, Lieutenant Scott wrote:
I was going to burn down some tree stumps aided by some petrol to get it
going. Having a bottle of white spirit to hand I thought I'd use that
instead of going to the garage to get petrol. It won't light!!!!

This is the exact product, and it says flammable on the side. But it
bloody well isn't.

http://www.bartoline.co.uk/products_...vent%20Ra nge


Yes it will. Flash point for standard white spirit is around 31 - 54 C
(Wikipedia) so you can't light a pool of it, but it will burn on a wick,
like paraffin.

I placed a lit cigarette lighter above it, and even into it, but it did not light.

--
http://petersparrots.com
http://petersphotos.com

Joey's teacher sent a note home to his Mother saying, "Joey seems to be a very bright boy, but spends too much of his time thinking about sex and girls."
The Mother wrote back the next day, "If you find a solution, please advise. I have the same problem with his Father."

On Apr 30, 8:00*pm, "Lieutenant Scott" wrote:
On Mon, 30 Apr 2012 16:43:51 +0100, newshound wrote:
On 30/04/2012 15:44, Lieutenant Scott wrote:
I was going to burn down some tree stumps aided by some petrol to get it
going. Having a bottle of white spirit to hand I thought I'd use that
instead of going to the garage to get petrol. It won't light!!!!

This is the exact product, and it says flammable on the side. But it
bloody well isn't.

http://www.bartoline.co.uk/products_...=23&Group=Solv...

Yes it will. Flash point for standard white spirit is around 31 - 54 C
(Wikipedia) so you can't light a pool of it, but it will burn on a wick,
like paraffin.

I placed a lit cigarette lighter above it, and even into it, but it did not light.


You ARE a halfwit. Only the vapour will burn. No vapour, no fire.
Simples.

On Mon, 30 Apr 2012 20:39:33 +0100, harry wrote:

On Apr 30, 8:00 pm, "Lieutenant Scott" wrote:
On Mon, 30 Apr 2012 16:43:51 +0100, newshound wrote:
On 30/04/2012 15:44, Lieutenant Scott wrote:
I was going to burn down some tree stumps aided by some petrol to get it
going. Having a bottle of white spirit to hand I thought I'd use that
instead of going to the garage to get petrol. It won't light!!!!

This is the exact product, and it says flammable on the side. But it
bloody well isn't.

http://www.bartoline.co.uk/products_...=23&Group=Solv...

Yes it will. Flash point for standard white spirit is around 31 - 54 C
(Wikipedia) so you can't light a pool of it, but it will burn on a wick,
like paraffin.

I placed a lit cigarette lighter above it, and even into it, but it did not light.


You ARE a halfwit. Only the vapour will burn. No vapour, no fire.
Simples.

Read again...... I placed a lit cigarette lighter ABOVE it.

--
http://petersparrots.com
http://petersphotos.com

The remarkable thing about my mother is that for 30 years she served us nothing but leftovers. The original meal has never been found. -- Calvin Trillin

"Lieutenant Scott" wrote in message
newsp.wdlgmza0ytk5n5@i7-940...


Read again...... I placed a lit cigarette lighter ABOVE it.

Put it under it and it will *warm up* and burn.

Lieutenant Scott wrote:
On Mon, 30 Apr 2012 20:39:33 +0100, harry wrote:

On Apr 30, 8:00 pm, "Lieutenant Scott" wrote:
On Mon, 30 Apr 2012 16:43:51 +0100, newshound
wrote:
On 30/04/2012 15:44, Lieutenant Scott wrote:
I was going to burn down some tree stumps aided by some petrol to
get it
going. Having a bottle of white spirit to hand I thought I'd use that
instead of going to the garage to get petrol. It won't light!!!!

This is the exact product, and it says flammable on the side. But it
bloody well isn't.

http://www.bartoline.co.uk/products_...=23&Group=Solv...


Yes it will. Flash point for standard white spirit is around 31 - 54 C
(Wikipedia) so you can't light a pool of it, but it will burn on a
wick,
like paraffin.

I placed a lit cigarette lighter above it, and even into it, but it
did not light.


You ARE a halfwit. Only the vapour will burn. No vapour, no fire.
Simples.

Read again...... I placed a lit cigarette lighter ABOVE it.

Until it gets to its flash point there is no vapour to burn. For white
spirit, the easiest way to get enough of it above its flash point so
that combustion can start is to use a wick. It's like diesel, you can
extinguish a burning cigarette in a pool of it of you're not too slow,
but it burns very well indeed using a wick or some other way of
vapourising a small amount.

--
Tciao for Now!

John.

On Apr 30, 4:43*pm, newshound wrote:
On 30/04/2012 15:44, Lieutenant Scott wrote: I was going to burn down some tree stumps aided by some petrol to get it
going. Having a bottle of white spirit to hand I thought I'd use that
instead of going to the garage to get petrol. It won't light!!!!

This is the exact product, and it says flammable on the side. But it
bloody well isn't.

http://www.bartoline.co.uk/products_...=23&Group=Solv...

Yes it will. Flash point for standard white spirit is around 31 - 54 C
(Wikipedia) so you can't light a pool of it, but it will burn on a wick,
like paraffin.

It is paraffin. Also it is kerosene. 16 carbon atoms per molecule puts
it half way between petrol and diesel.

"Lieutenant Scott" wrote:
I was going to burn down some tree stumps aided by some petrol to get it going.

Excellent idea, remember to use as much petrol as possible.

On 30/04/2012 16:46, Steve Firth wrote:
"Lieutenant wrote:
I was going to burn down some tree stumps aided by some petrol to get it going.

Excellent idea, remember to use as much petrol as possible.

and remember to put the video on YouTube in case it merits submission to
the Darwin awards

On Mon, 30 Apr 2012 16:56:39 +0100, Nospam wrote:

On 30/04/2012 16:46, Steve Firth wrote:
"Lieutenant wrote:
I was going to burn down some tree stumps aided by some petrol to get
it going.

Excellent idea, remember to use as much petrol as possible.

and remember to put the video on YouTube in case it merits submission to
the Darwin awards

erm you mean arrange your will to include whoever finds your remains to
post said video on youpube?

Jim K

On Mon, 30 Apr 2012 18:06:09 +0100, Jim K wrote:

On Mon, 30 Apr 2012 16:56:39 +0100, Nospam wrote:

On 30/04/2012 16:46, Steve Firth wrote:
"Lieutenant wrote:
I was going to burn down some tree stumps aided by some petrol to get
it going.

Excellent idea, remember to use as much petrol as possible.

and remember to put the video on YouTube in case it merits submission to
the Darwin awards

erm you mean arrange your will to include whoever finds your remains to
post said video on youpube?

I did manage to set fire to a jug of petrol I was holding while soaking the stump next to the one that was burning, that would have looked funny on video.

--
http://petersparrots.com
http://petersphotos.com

When eating a tongue sandwich, how do you know when you've finished?

On Apr 30, 8:01*pm, "Lieutenant Scott" wrote:
On Mon, 30 Apr 2012 18:06:09 +0100, Jim K wrote:
On Mon, 30 Apr 2012 16:56:39 +0100, Nospam wrote:

On 30/04/2012 16:46, Steve Firth wrote:
"Lieutenant *wrote:
I was going to burn down some tree stumps aided by some petrol to get
it going.

Excellent idea, remember to use as much petrol as possible.

and remember to put the video on YouTube in case it merits submission to
the Darwin awards

erm you mean arrange your will to include whoever finds your remains to
post said video on youpube?

I did manage to set fire to a jug of petrol I was holding while soaking the stump next to the one that was burning, that would have looked funny on video.

A bit like that silly cow that was decanting petrol in her kitchen a
couple of weeks back eh?

On Mon, 30 Apr 2012 15:46:37 +0000 (UTC), Steve Firth wrote:

I was going to burn down some tree stumps aided by some petrol to
get
it going.

Excellent idea, remember to use as much petrol as possible.

And leave it to soak in for few minutes before attempting to light it
with a lighter.

--
Cheers
Dave.

On Mon, 30 Apr 2012 15:44:47 +0100, Lieutenant Scott wrote:

I was going to burn down some tree stumps aided by some petrol to get it
going. Having a bottle of white spirit to hand I thought I'd use that
instead of going to the garage to get petrol. It won't light!!!!

This is the exact product, and it says flammable on the side. But it
bloody well isn't.

http://www.bartoline.co.uk/products_...&Group=Solvent
%20Range

as someone who has BTDTGTT I suggest you get a decent ax, pick, and
shovel, expose the roots around the stump, and chop it out.

On 30/04/2012 17:11, Jethro_uk wrote:
On Mon, 30 Apr 2012 15:44:47 +0100, Lieutenant Scott wrote:

I was going to burn down some tree stumps aided by some petrol to get it
going. Having a bottle of white spirit to hand I thought I'd use that
instead of going to the garage to get petrol. It won't light!!!!

This is the exact product, and it says flammable on the side. But it
bloody well isn't.

http://www.bartoline.co.uk/products_...&Group=Solvent
%20Range

as someone who has BTDTGTT I suggest you get a decent ax, pick, and
shovel, expose the roots around the stump, and chop it out.

Agreed; although you can also use one of those "chainsaw" disks in an
angle grinder!

A Mattock is also a useful supplement to your list.

On Mon, 30 Apr 2012 17:24:43 +0100, newshound wrote:

On 30/04/2012 17:11, Jethro_uk wrote:
On Mon, 30 Apr 2012 15:44:47 +0100, Lieutenant Scott wrote:

I was going to burn down some tree stumps aided by some petrol to get it
going. Having a bottle of white spirit to hand I thought I'd use that
instead of going to the garage to get petrol. It won't light!!!!

This is the exact product, and it says flammable on the side. But it
bloody well isn't.

http://www.bartoline.co.uk/products_...&Group=Solvent
%20Range

as someone who has BTDTGTT I suggest you get a decent ax, pick, and
shovel, expose the roots around the stump, and chop it out.

Agreed; although you can also use one of those "chainsaw" disks in an
angle grinder!

Unfortunately my angle grinder is the small kind, it can't cut deep enough through a big stump.

--
http://petersparrots.com
http://petersphotos.com

How do you titillate an ocelot?
Oscillate its titalot.

On 30/04/2012 20:03, Lieutenant Scott wrote:
On Mon, 30 Apr 2012 17:24:43 +0100, newshound
wrote:

On 30/04/2012 17:11, Jethro_uk wrote:
On Mon, 30 Apr 2012 15:44:47 +0100, Lieutenant Scott wrote:

I was going to burn down some tree stumps aided by some petrol to
get it
going. Having a bottle of white spirit to hand I thought I'd use that
instead of going to the garage to get petrol. It won't light!!!!

This is the exact product, and it says flammable on the side. But it
bloody well isn't.

http://www.bartoline.co.uk/products_...&Group=Solvent

%20Range

as someone who has BTDTGTT I suggest you get a decent ax, pick, and
shovel, expose the roots around the stump, and chop it out.

Agreed; although you can also use one of those "chainsaw" disks in an
angle grinder!

Unfortunately my angle grinder is the small kind, it can't cut deep
enough through a big stump.

A stump grinder is rather like what I was proposing. You attack it from
one side and carry on until you are through to the other, having reduced
it all to chips. As others have said, usually the best approach is to
dig all the way round and sever the roots below ground level before
pulling it out. But you can't always do that, and this is where the
stump grinder comes in.

It was half a joke, actually, given that some of us like to use them to
solve all problems.

On 30/04/2012 21:23, newshound wrote:
On 30/04/2012 20:03, Lieutenant Scott wrote:
On Mon, 30 Apr 2012 17:24:43 +0100, newshound
wrote:

On 30/04/2012 17:11, Jethro_uk wrote:
On Mon, 30 Apr 2012 15:44:47 +0100, Lieutenant Scott wrote:

I was going to burn down some tree stumps aided by some petrol to
get it
going. Having a bottle of white spirit to hand I thought I'd use that
instead of going to the garage to get petrol. It won't light!!!!

This is the exact product, and it says flammable on the side. But it
bloody well isn't.

http://www.bartoline.co.uk/products_...&Group=Solvent


%20Range

as someone who has BTDTGTT I suggest you get a decent ax, pick, and
shovel, expose the roots around the stump, and chop it out.

Agreed; although you can also use one of those "chainsaw" disks in an
angle grinder!

Unfortunately my angle grinder is the small kind, it can't cut deep
enough through a big stump.

A stump grinder is rather like what I was proposing. You attack it from
one side and carry on until you are through to the other, having reduced
it all to chips. As others have said, usually the best approach is to
dig all the way round and sever the roots below ground level before
pulling it out. But you can't always do that, and this is where the
stump grinder comes in.

It was half a joke, actually, given that some of us like to use them to
solve all problems.
BTDTGTTS many times. DON'T use a chainsaw, ever! Do be patient and dig
around the roots with a trowel. A bowsaw is a good tool as is a
reciprocating saw with a suitable blade for tricky bits. Have an axe or
two and a 5' metal lever bar too. Even big ones only take a few hours of
patience. I don't imagine they can be burnt out except by building a big
bonfire and leaving it burning overnight.

Alternatively take the Baster Bates approach and blow the bu**ers up :-)

--
Pete
Lose (rhymes with fuse) is a verb, the opposite of find. Loose (rhymes
with juice) is an adjective, the opposite of tight.

On Apr 30, 9:23*pm, newshound wrote:
On 30/04/2012 20:03, Lieutenant Scott wrote:



On Mon, 30 Apr 2012 17:24:43 +0100, newshound
wrote:

On 30/04/2012 17:11, Jethro_uk wrote:
On Mon, 30 Apr 2012 15:44:47 +0100, Lieutenant Scott wrote:

I was going to burn down some tree stumps aided by some petrol to
get it
going. Having a bottle of white spirit to hand I thought I'd use that
instead of going to the garage to get petrol. It won't light!!!!

This is the exact product, and it says flammable on the side. But it
bloody well isn't.

http://www.bartoline.co.uk/products_...&Group=Solvent

%20Range

as someone who has BTDTGTT I suggest you get a decent ax, pick, and
shovel, expose the roots around the stump, and chop it out.

Agreed; although you can also use one of those "chainsaw" disks in an
angle grinder!

Unfortunately my angle grinder is the small kind, it can't cut deep
enough through a big stump.

A stump grinder is rather like what I was proposing. You attack it from
one side and carry on until you are through to the other, having reduced
it all to chips. As others have said, usually the best approach is to
dig all the way round and sever the roots below ground level before
pulling it out. But you can't always do that, and this is where the
stump grinder comes in.

It was half a joke, actually, given that some of us like to use them to
solve all problems.- Hide quoted text -

- Show quoted text -

Before that, one should cut trees off four or five feet above ground
level to give some leverage to get the stump out.

On Mon, 30 Apr 2012 17:11:03 +0100, Jethro_uk wrote:

On Mon, 30 Apr 2012 15:44:47 +0100, Lieutenant Scott wrote:

I was going to burn down some tree stumps aided by some petrol to get it
going. Having a bottle of white spirit to hand I thought I'd use that
instead of going to the garage to get petrol. It won't light!!!!

This is the exact product, and it says flammable on the side. But it
bloody well isn't.

http://www.bartoline.co.uk/products_...&Group=Solvent
%20Range

as someone who has BTDTGTT I suggest you get a decent ax, pick, and
shovel, expose the roots around the stump, and chop it out.

I have a pick and shovel but it was taking ages - there were 10 of them.

--
http://petersparrots.com
http://petersphotos.com

How do you titillate an ocelot?
Oscillate its titalot.

On Mon, 30 Apr 2012 15:44:47 +0100, Lieutenant Scott wrote:

I was going to burn down some tree stumps aided by some petrol to get it going. Having a bottle of white spirit to hand I thought I'd use that instead of going to the garage to get petrol. It won't light!!!!

This is the exact product, and it says flammable on the side. But it bloody well isn't.

http://www.bartoline.co.uk/products_...vent%20Ra nge


Sorted.

I bought a jerry can of petrol and tried burning them, but they kept going out. So I took the easy option.

To my neighbour's horror, I reversed the car into the back garden, tied the tree stumps to the towbar, and yanked them out of the ground. She was particularly concerned that my car (or flying tree stump) was aiming directly for her kitchen window. She took the dog for a walk while I did it :-)

--
http://petersparrots.com
http://petersphotos.com

My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming anniversary. She said, 'I want something shiny that goes from 0 to 150 in about 3 seconds.'
So I bought her a set of scales.
And then the fight started...

On 30/04/2012 19:58, Lieutenant Scott wrote:
On Mon, 30 Apr 2012 15:44:47 +0100, Lieutenant Scott wrote:

I was going to burn down some tree stumps aided by some petrol to get
it going. Having a bottle of white spirit to hand I thought I'd use
that instead of going to the garage to get petrol. It won't light!!!!

This is the exact product, and it says flammable on the side. But it
bloody well isn't.

http://www.bartoline.co.uk/products_...vent%20Ra nge



Sorted.

I bought a jerry can of petrol and tried burning them, but they kept
going out. So I took the easy option.

To my neighbour's horror, I reversed the car into the back garden, tied
the tree stumps to the towbar, and yanked them out of the ground. She
was particularly concerned that my car (or flying tree stump) was aiming
directly for her kitchen window. She took the dog for a walk while I did
it :-)


Glad it's sorted. Can't have been much of a tree stump in that case,
though (unless it was very rotten below ground). When it's the other way
round, a small tree can stop a surprisingly fast or heavy vehicle.

On Mon, 30 Apr 2012 21:27:02 +0100, newshound wrote:

On 30/04/2012 19:58, Lieutenant Scott wrote:
On Mon, 30 Apr 2012 15:44:47 +0100, Lieutenant Scott wrote:

I was going to burn down some tree stumps aided by some petrol to get
it going. Having a bottle of white spirit to hand I thought I'd use
that instead of going to the garage to get petrol. It won't light!!!!

This is the exact product, and it says flammable on the side. But it
bloody well isn't.

http://www.bartoline.co.uk/products_...vent%20Ra nge



Sorted.

I bought a jerry can of petrol and tried burning them, but they kept
going out. So I took the easy option.

To my neighbour's horror, I reversed the car into the back garden, tied
the tree stumps to the towbar, and yanked them out of the ground. She
was particularly concerned that my car (or flying tree stump) was aiming
directly for her kitchen window. She took the dog for a walk while I did
it :-)

Glad it's sorted. Can't have been much of a tree stump in that case,
though (unless it was very rotten below ground). When it's the other way
round, a small tree can stop a surprisingly fast or heavy vehicle.

It's a 1.9 turbo diesel, and I took a good run at it. Snapped a tow rope and a chain before getting all 10 out. Automatic gearbox helps too.

--
http://petersparrots.com
http://petersphotos.com

I was on a Southwest flight once that was delayed at the gate after everyone boarded. The flight attendant said over the intercom, "We're sorry for the delay. The machine that normally rips the handles off your luggage is broken, so we're having to do it by hand. We should be finished and on our way shortly."

On Mon, 30 Apr 2012 21:44:06 +0100
"Lieutenant Scott" wrote:

On Mon, 30 Apr 2012 21:27:02 +0100, newshound
wrote:

On 30/04/2012 19:58, Lieutenant Scott wrote:
On Mon, 30 Apr 2012 15:44:47 +0100, Lieutenant Scott
wrote:

I was going to burn down some tree stumps aided by some petrol to
get it going. Having a bottle of white spirit to hand I thought
I'd use that instead of going to the garage to get petrol. It
won't light!!!!

This is the exact product, and it says flammable on the side. But
it bloody well isn't.

http://www.bartoline.co.uk/products_...vent%20Ra nge



Sorted.

I bought a jerry can of petrol and tried burning them, but they
kept going out. So I took the easy option.

To my neighbour's horror, I reversed the car into the back garden,
tied the tree stumps to the towbar, and yanked them out of the
ground. She was particularly concerned that my car (or flying tree
stump) was aiming directly for her kitchen window. She took the
dog for a walk while I did it :-)

Glad it's sorted. Can't have been much of a tree stump in that case,
though (unless it was very rotten below ground). When it's the
other way round, a small tree can stop a surprisingly fast or heavy
vehicle.

It's a 1.9 turbo diesel, and I took a good run at it. Snapped a tow
rope and a chain before getting all 10 out. Automatic gearbox helps
too.


Remind me not to buy a car from you.
--
Davey.

On Mon, 30 Apr 2012 23:45:59 +0100, Davey wrote:

On Mon, 30 Apr 2012 21:44:06 +0100
"Lieutenant Scott" wrote:

On Mon, 30 Apr 2012 21:27:02 +0100, newshound
wrote:

On 30/04/2012 19:58, Lieutenant Scott wrote:
On Mon, 30 Apr 2012 15:44:47 +0100, Lieutenant Scott
wrote:

I was going to burn down some tree stumps aided by some petrol to
get it going. Having a bottle of white spirit to hand I thought
I'd use that instead of going to the garage to get petrol. It
won't light!!!!

This is the exact product, and it says flammable on the side. But
it bloody well isn't.

http://www.bartoline.co.uk/products_...vent%20Ra nge



Sorted.

I bought a jerry can of petrol and tried burning them, but they
kept going out. So I took the easy option.

To my neighbour's horror, I reversed the car into the back garden,
tied the tree stumps to the towbar, and yanked them out of the
ground. She was particularly concerned that my car (or flying tree
stump) was aiming directly for her kitchen window. She took the
dog for a walk while I did it :-)

Glad it's sorted. Can't have been much of a tree stump in that case,
though (unless it was very rotten below ground). When it's the
other way round, a small tree can stop a surprisingly fast or heavy
vehicle.

It's a 1.9 turbo diesel, and I took a good run at it. Snapped a tow
rope and a chain before getting all 10 out. Automatic gearbox helps
too.


Remind me not to buy a car from you.

You seem to be under the mistaken idea that a car can't pull something that hard. Think how tough a towbar and attachments has to be to pull a caravan safely.

--
http://petersparrots.com
http://petersphotos.com

Everyone has a photographic memory, some just don't have film.

On Apr 30, 9:44*pm, "Lieutenant Scott" wrote:
On Mon, 30 Apr 2012 21:27:02 +0100, newshound wrote:
On 30/04/2012 19:58, Lieutenant Scott wrote:
On Mon, 30 Apr 2012 15:44:47 +0100, Lieutenant Scott wrote:

I was going to burn down some tree stumps aided by some petrol to get
it going. Having a bottle of white spirit to hand I thought I'd use
that instead of going to the garage to get petrol. It won't light!!!!

This is the exact product, and it says flammable on the side. But it
bloody well isn't.

http://www.bartoline.co.uk/products_...=23&Group=Solv...

Sorted.

I bought a jerry can of petrol and tried burning them, but they kept
going out. So I took the easy option.

To my neighbour's horror, I reversed the car into the back garden, tied
the tree stumps to the towbar, and yanked them out of the ground. She
was particularly concerned that my car (or flying tree stump) was aiming
directly for her kitchen window. She took the dog for a walk while I did
it :-)

Glad it's sorted. Can't have been much of a tree stump in that case,
though (unless it was very rotten below ground). When it's the other way
round, a small tree can stop a surprisingly fast or heavy vehicle.

It's a 1.9 turbo diesel, and I took a good run at it. *Snapped a tow rope and a chain before getting all 10 out. *Automatic gearbox helps too.

You're lucky you didn't break something.

On Tue, 01 May 2012 07:24:04 +0100, harry wrote:

On Apr 30, 9:44 pm, "Lieutenant Scott" wrote:
On Mon, 30 Apr 2012 21:27:02 +0100, newshound wrote:
On 30/04/2012 19:58, Lieutenant Scott wrote:
On Mon, 30 Apr 2012 15:44:47 +0100, Lieutenant Scott wrote:

I was going to burn down some tree stumps aided by some petrol to get
it going. Having a bottle of white spirit to hand I thought I'd use
that instead of going to the garage to get petrol. It won't light!!!!

This is the exact product, and it says flammable on the side. But it
bloody well isn't.

http://www.bartoline.co.uk/products_...=23&Group=Solv...

Sorted.

I bought a jerry can of petrol and tried burning them, but they kept
going out. So I took the easy option.

To my neighbour's horror, I reversed the car into the back garden, tied
the tree stumps to the towbar, and yanked them out of the ground. She
was particularly concerned that my car (or flying tree stump) was aiming
directly for her kitchen window. She took the dog for a walk while I did
it :-)

Glad it's sorted. Can't have been much of a tree stump in that case,
though (unless it was very rotten below ground). When it's the other way
round, a small tree can stop a surprisingly fast or heavy vehicle.

It's a 1.9 turbo diesel, and I took a good run at it. Snapped a tow rope and a chain before getting all 10 out. Automatic gearbox helps too..

You're lucky you didn't break something.

Like what?

--
http://petersparrots.com
http://petersphotos.com

Paddy calls Easyjet to book a flight.
The operator asks "How many people are flying with you?"
Paddy replies "I don't know! Its your flipping plane!"

On Mon, 30 Apr 2012 19:58:37 +0100, "Lieutenant Scott"
wrote:

To my neighbour's horror, I reversed the car into the back garden, tied the tree stumps to the towbar, and yanked them out of the ground.

****'s sake.

On Tue, 01 May 2012 00:12:12 +0100, wrote:

On Mon, 30 Apr 2012 19:58:37 +0100, "Lieutenant Scott"
wrote:

To my neighbour's horror, I reversed the car into the back garden, tied the tree stumps to the towbar, and yanked them out of the ground.

****'s sake.

It worked. And considerably faster than doing it by hand.

--
http://petersparrots.com
http://petersphotos.com

Why do I have to wear a shirt and tie to go in a bar to see a topless dancer?

On Mon, 30 Apr 2012 19:58:37 +0100, Lieutenant Scott wrote:
Sorted.

I bought a jerry can of petrol and tried burning them, but they kept
going out. So I took the easy option.

To my neighbour's horror, I reversed the car into the back garden, tied
the tree stumps to the towbar, and yanked them out of the ground.

What was wrong with using explosives?

Jules Richardson wrote
Lieutenant Scott wrote

Sorted.

I bought a jerry can of petrol and tried burning them,
but they kept going out. So I took the easy option.

To my neighbour's horror, I reversed the car into the back garden, tied
the tree stumps to the towbar, and yanked them out of the ground.

What was wrong with using explosives?

The invididual using them in that case.

On Wed, 02 May 2012 02:06:07 +0100, Jules Richardson wrote:

On Mon, 30 Apr 2012 19:58:37 +0100, Lieutenant Scott wrote:
Sorted.

I bought a jerry can of petrol and tried burning them, but they kept
going out. So I took the easy option.

To my neighbour's horror, I reversed the car into the back garden, tied
the tree stumps to the towbar, and yanked them out of the ground.

What was wrong with using explosives?

Getting hold of the explosives.

--
http://petersparrots.com
http://petersphotos.com

There are more men than women in mental hospitals - which just goes to show who's driving who crazy.

"Lieutenant Scott" wrote in message
newsp.wdo28jlvytk5n5@i7-940...
On Wed, 02 May 2012 02:06:07 +0100, Jules Richardson
wrote:

On Mon, 30 Apr 2012 19:58:37 +0100, Lieutenant Scott wrote:
Sorted.

I bought a jerry can of petrol and tried burning them, but they kept
going out. So I took the easy option.

To my neighbour's horror, I reversed the car into the back garden, tied
the tree stumps to the towbar, and yanked them out of the ground.

What was wrong with using explosives?

Getting hold of the explosives.

Hey, that's your funniest line, keep it up.

On Wed, 02 May 2012 22:32:38 +0100, brass monkey wrote:


"Lieutenant Scott" wrote in message
newsp.wdo28jlvytk5n5@i7-940...
On Wed, 02 May 2012 02:06:07 +0100, Jules Richardson
wrote:

On Mon, 30 Apr 2012 19:58:37 +0100, Lieutenant Scott wrote:
Sorted.

I bought a jerry can of petrol and tried burning them, but they kept
going out. So I took the easy option.

To my neighbour's horror, I reversed the car into the back garden, tied
the tree stumps to the towbar, and yanked them out of the ground.

What was wrong with using explosives?

Getting hold of the explosives.

Hey, that's your funniest line, keep it up.

What was funny about it?


--
http://petersparrots.com
http://petersphotos.com

I got invited to a Muslim party the other night.
It was the fastest game of pass the parcel I've even seen!