In article m,
"brass monkey" writes:
Had a terrific phone call today -
Him - I have information that you had an RTA in the last 3 years

On several occasions, I've instantly responded to that by saying
"lier!". That comes as quite a surprise, and the call goes
completely off their script (and comfort zone) from that point on.

Me - You're dreaming it up, mate
Him - Do you think I waste my ****ing time phoning people up on a dream, you
****ing knob
Me - Well, you're wasting MY time
followed by much hilarity and telling the wife that some **** is calling me
a ****ing knob. If anyone was near him they'd have heard me laughing my
goolies off.
Anyway, I said thanks very much and put the phone down.
Number withheld, there's a surprise.

I had a WITHHELD in the morning a few days ago...
"Is that Mr Gabriel?" in a broad Indian accent.
"Who's asking?" is always my initial response to this.
"It's Robert Smith"
I forget the name he actually gave now, but it was very English,
given in a very Indian accent.
"I'm calling you from [I forget the company] in London.
How are you this afternoon, Mr Gabriel?"
Why on earth do they ask this? I must think up some response which is
going to take half an hour to explain with no opportunity for interruption,
but I haven't done that yet. However, this time the reponse was dead easy.
I said
"Well, actually it's the morning in this country."
That buggered up his call script. There were a few "Oh", "um", and
the like, and then he tried to continue with his script, but it
went to pieces because I laughed, and then he got the giggles and
couldn't get the words out, and eventually he cleared down the call
mid-sentence.

At least that one left me laughing afterwards, rather than annoyed.


Then there was another one this morning, showing INTERNATIONAL
"Hello", I said.
"Is that Mrs Gabriel?" was the response.
"Not unless she's suddenly got a very deep voice".
Click - the call is cut off.

--
Andrew Gabriel
[email address is not usable -- followup in the newsgroup]