April 01, 2011

This morning, one of the seminary teachers called
me, early. As the seminary classes tend to be held
kind of early. She didn't make much sense. Some-
thing about having to hold seminary in the parking
lot due to the water. I didn't know what she meant,
but assured her that I would check it out in a couple
hours when I woke up. Anyhow, I'm just back from
the building.

When I arrived, it looked like the inside of the exterior
door glass was wet, up to about six or eight inches. I
wasn't sure what that was all about. Well, check it out.
When I tried to open the door, the lock was jammed.
It unlocked with my key, but the lever didn't want to
pull down. I finally slammed all my weight into the
door, which took the pressure off the latch.

It wasn't just wet up to six inches, there was water
that high. The rush of water soaked my socks and
shoes, but fortunately I had a dry pair in the truck.
The water started to erode the grass, along side the
sidewalk. After a while, three or four minutes, I
realized the flow of water out the door wasn't
going to stop any time soon. So, I walked around
the building, opening the other doors. Thirteeen of
them, like I remember from all these nights of walk
around and check to see if the building is locked.
The salt pails must not have been very full, they were
floating. I used the salt pails to block the doors open.
Snow shovels work well, as door wedges.

Must have been hot water, as the cold air came in, the
vapor all condensed, and made clouds of steam.

Fortunaely, I still had my big yellow boots, from
when I cleared the creek, to the north of the building.
Put them on, and had a couple steps into the building.
Brought my big flash light, to look around. Hard to
see, with all that steam, though. Looked like one of
the hot water pipes that feeds the baptistry had come
unsoldered. Or broke, in some form. The water was
pouring out across the stage, in back of the baptistry.
It was really kind of neat, looked like Niagara Falls,
with all the water coming off the stage. I tried to take
a couple pictures to send you, but the lens on my
camera fogged over.

With a couple inches of water still inside, I couldn't
tell, but the surface of the gym felt kind of rough.
Wonder if the hot water swelled the wood of the
gym floor? Felt like it.

It is such a coincidence that I was planning to take
a walk around with the Fairport Bishopric. I'd
researched for them, where the shut offs are, for
the building. I went to where the water shut off is,
and gave it a turn. Sadly, the valve was pretty rusted
from whatever. Must have gotten wet? No worries, I
always carry a couple pipe wrenches in the truck.
Come back in, and give it a bit of twist. Problem is,
that the valve shaft of the shut off twisted off, and
left me getting unscheduled shower, as the valve
and valve shaft broke. I dropped the wrench, and
beat a rapid retreat. Tripped, as I was moving along,
and fell. Hit my head on something. No worries, I
found my eye glasses, and flash light on the bottom
of the water. Just a bit dizzy is all. I'll be OK.

Outside, I dried off my cell phone, and dialed for help.
I didn't know if it would work, having been under water.
When I fell, I landed on the side that carries my cell
phone. The nice 911 operator connected me to the
water department. They were at the building about an
hour later, and used some kind of big T-handle wrench
to shut off the valve in the ground. Oh, the storm drain
on the stake wing side. It's a good thing that was below
grade, it sure helped drain off some of the water. Lucky,
I was able to sit in the truck and run the motor. I'm not
coughing as badly now.

I remembered in my old fire department days, that we
used to do water problem clean up, so I called the
local FD. They came out with the rescue truck and
some backpack vacuum cleaners. They had to run
their onboard generator, as most of the circuits had
tripped off, as the wires were wet. But, they were very
nice about it.

They suggested to turn off the power to the building.
And isn't that just the way? The church must be true.
I knew right where the electric shut offs were, too.
The big disconnect made a loud buzzing, as I was
turning it off. The FD guys says that's typical, the
current flow tends to ark, and make a kind of lightning
effect when shutting off a circuit that has a lot of amps
of current flow. I asked what could possibly be drawing
current, and the FD guy said probably account of all
the wet wire, the electricity was going through the water.
Maybe it's a good thing I was wearing rubber boots?
The big disconnect was making a burning plastic smell
as I was shutting off the power. Can we get Elder
P. the electrician back for a couple days? Sounds like
that big main disconnect needs to be taken apart and
cleaned. It's in the panel box, and all. Can't do that
on the ward level, like you say. I'm not authorized.
Can't go into panel boxes.

They had a hard time vacuuming up the water, the ceiling
tiles had all come apart, and were laying on the floor,
crumpled up. Kept clogging the hoses, on their wet vacs.
Fortunately, by that time the standing water had mostly run
out to the parking lot. The fire department guys also had
the special wrench, they shut off the gas for us. So we
won't burn out the instant water heaters. Aren't they just
the greatest people on Earth?

I told them I'd tried to shut off the water. They told me
that I shouldn't have been in the building because of all
the black mold on the ceilings and walls. That I really
needed a respirator, and I ought to go to the hospital,
and get checked out for mold exposure. Might need
some antibiotics or something. Could explain the
coughing, and spitting up blood.

The fire department guys left the business card of a
service that does damage control and mold remediation.
Oh, hang on. I'll find it here in a minute.

1-800-APRIL-FOOL. Aren't you glad it's April 01?

--
Christopher A. Young
Learn more about Jesus
www.lds.org
..

On Apr 1, 7:13*am, "Stormin Mormon"
wrote:
April 01, 2011

This morning, one of the seminary teachers called
me, early. As the seminary classes tend to be held
kind of early. She didn't make much sense. Some-
thing about having to hold seminary in the parking
lot due to the water. I didn't know what she meant,
but assured her that I would check it out in a couple
hours when I woke up. Anyhow, I'm just back from
the building.

[...]

Time to switch religions or escape the whole mythology.
No April Fool.

HB

Good story. Anyone who works in or around a maintenance
department can't help but appreciate. We had a freak wind gust
take the roof off a 2 story school during a 4" rain. Similar
stories. Not April fool.

--
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
DanG
Keep the whole world singing . . .


"Stormin Mormon" wrote in
message ...
April 01, 2011

This morning, one of the seminary teachers called
me, early. As the seminary classes tend to be held
kind of early. She didn't make much sense. Some-
thing about having to hold seminary in the parking
lot due to the water. I didn't know what she meant,
but assured her that I would check it out in a couple
hours when I woke up. Anyhow, I'm just back from
the building.

When I arrived, it looked like the inside of the exterior
door glass was wet, up to about six or eight inches. I
wasn't sure what that was all about. Well, check it out.
When I tried to open the door, the lock was jammed.
It unlocked with my key, but the lever didn't want to
pull down. I finally slammed all my weight into the
door, which took the pressure off the latch.

It wasn't just wet up to six inches, there was water
that high. The rush of water soaked my socks and
shoes, but fortunately I had a dry pair in the truck.
The water started to erode the grass, along side the
sidewalk. After a while, three or four minutes, I
realized the flow of water out the door wasn't
going to stop any time soon. So, I walked around
the building, opening the other doors. Thirteeen of
them, like I remember from all these nights of walk
around and check to see if the building is locked.
The salt pails must not have been very full, they were
floating. I used the salt pails to block the doors open.
Snow shovels work well, as door wedges.

Must have been hot water, as the cold air came in, the
vapor all condensed, and made clouds of steam.

Fortunaely, I still had my big yellow boots, from
when I cleared the creek, to the north of the building.
Put them on, and had a couple steps into the building.
Brought my big flash light, to look around. Hard to
see, with all that steam, though. Looked like one of
the hot water pipes that feeds the baptistry had come
unsoldered. Or broke, in some form. The water was
pouring out across the stage, in back of the baptistry.
It was really kind of neat, looked like Niagara Falls,
with all the water coming off the stage. I tried to take
a couple pictures to send you, but the lens on my
camera fogged over.

With a couple inches of water still inside, I couldn't
tell, but the surface of the gym felt kind of rough.
Wonder if the hot water swelled the wood of the
gym floor? Felt like it.

It is such a coincidence that I was planning to take
a walk around with the Fairport Bishopric. I'd
researched for them, where the shut offs are, for
the building. I went to where the water shut off is,
and gave it a turn. Sadly, the valve was pretty rusted
from whatever. Must have gotten wet? No worries, I
always carry a couple pipe wrenches in the truck.
Come back in, and give it a bit of twist. Problem is,
that the valve shaft of the shut off twisted off, and
left me getting unscheduled shower, as the valve
and valve shaft broke. I dropped the wrench, and
beat a rapid retreat. Tripped, as I was moving along,
and fell. Hit my head on something. No worries, I
found my eye glasses, and flash light on the bottom
of the water. Just a bit dizzy is all. I'll be OK.

Outside, I dried off my cell phone, and dialed for help.
I didn't know if it would work, having been under water.
When I fell, I landed on the side that carries my cell
phone. The nice 911 operator connected me to the
water department. They were at the building about an
hour later, and used some kind of big T-handle wrench
to shut off the valve in the ground. Oh, the storm drain
on the stake wing side. It's a good thing that was below
grade, it sure helped drain off some of the water. Lucky,
I was able to sit in the truck and run the motor. I'm not
coughing as badly now.

I remembered in my old fire department days, that we
used to do water problem clean up, so I called the
local FD. They came out with the rescue truck and
some backpack vacuum cleaners. They had to run
their onboard generator, as most of the circuits had
tripped off, as the wires were wet. But, they were very
nice about it.

They suggested to turn off the power to the building.
And isn't that just the way? The church must be true.
I knew right where the electric shut offs were, too.
The big disconnect made a loud buzzing, as I was
turning it off. The FD guys says that's typical, the
current flow tends to ark, and make a kind of lightning
effect when shutting off a circuit that has a lot of amps
of current flow. I asked what could possibly be drawing
current, and the FD guy said probably account of all
the wet wire, the electricity was going through the water.
Maybe it's a good thing I was wearing rubber boots?
The big disconnect was making a burning plastic smell
as I was shutting off the power. Can we get Elder
P. the electrician back for a couple days? Sounds like
that big main disconnect needs to be taken apart and
cleaned. It's in the panel box, and all. Can't do that
on the ward level, like you say. I'm not authorized.
Can't go into panel boxes.

They had a hard time vacuuming up the water, the ceiling
tiles had all come apart, and were laying on the floor,
crumpled up. Kept clogging the hoses, on their wet vacs.
Fortunately, by that time the standing water had mostly run
out to the parking lot. The fire department guys also had
the special wrench, they shut off the gas for us. So we
won't burn out the instant water heaters. Aren't they just
the greatest people on Earth?

I told them I'd tried to shut off the water. They told me
that I shouldn't have been in the building because of all
the black mold on the ceilings and walls. That I really
needed a respirator, and I ought to go to the hospital,
and get checked out for mold exposure. Might need
some antibiotics or something. Could explain the
coughing, and spitting up blood.

The fire department guys left the business card of a
service that does damage control and mold remediation.
Oh, hang on. I'll find it here in a minute.

1-800-APRIL-FOOL. Aren't you glad it's April 01?

--
Christopher A. Young
Learn more about Jesus
www.lds.org
.

On 4/1/2011 6:37 PM, Higgs Boson wrote:
On Apr 1, 7:13 am, "Stormin Mormon"
wrote:
April 01, 2011

This morning, one of the seminary teachers called
me, early. As the seminary classes tend to be held
kind of early. She didn't make much sense. Some-
thing about having to hold seminary in the parking
lot due to the water. I didn't know what she meant,
but assured her that I would check it out in a couple
hours when I woke up. Anyhow, I'm just back from
the building.

[...]

Time to switch religions or escape the whole mythology.
No April Fool.

For Stormin, every day is April Fools.

Jeff

HB