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#1
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Man sucked into Satellite Dish explodes and dies
wrote in message ... December 25, 2007 It began as BLAH BLAH BLAH Gary Hernandez - Reporter WEED Tv Inc. Ontario Really lame.....did your Mommy write this for you?? |
#2
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Man sucked into Satellite Dish explodes and dies
"Roger Buttsnort" wrote in message ... wrote in message ... December 25, 2007 It began as BLAH BLAH BLAH Gary Hernandez - Reporter WEED Tv Inc. Ontario Really lame.....did your Mommy write this for you? I can see why the owners are holding out against the writers in the current strike. Although, it's better than some of the claptrap that was on TV before the strike. Steve |
#3
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Man sucked into Satellite Dish explodes and dies
You must work for MSNBC
wrote in message ... December 25, 2007 |
#4
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Man sucked into Satellite Dish explodes and dies
December 25, 2007
It began as a happy Christmas on 21st Avenue, but ended in trajedy. Robert Kellington loved his television, and had at least one set in every room of the house, all connected to his satellite system. On Christmas eve he got a 60 inch big screen television as a gift. Early on Christmas morning he flipped on the kitchen tv, grabbed a bite to eat and went to the bathroom for personal needs. While in the bathroom, he flipped on the bathroom tv set. Both his son and daughter were watching cartoons in their bedrooms, and his wife was watching a church service on the 27 inch master bedroom television. Kellington went to the basement to get some tools, and immediately flipped on the basement tv, leaving it on as he came back upstairs and went to the living toom to connect the cable to his new big screen set. He got the cable connected, and hit the power switch, just when his neighbor, Matthew Foreman was running a snowblower on his driveway, near the Kellington's satellite dish. The moment Robert Kellington his the power switch on his new big screen tv, there was a power surge through the satellite dish, and his neighbor, Matthew Foreman was sucked into the dish, along with his snowblower. Both him and the snowblower exploded as they smashed thru the center of the satellite dish, and were expelled out the rear in small pieces of flesh, bone, and metal, which were spread across an area several city blocks wide. Police investigators later said there were 14 television sets turned on at the same time in the Kellington's home, and the surge of that big screen set created such a powerful burst of energy, it literally sucked Foreman into the dish, causing his instantanious death. They went on to explain that the dish was sucking so much power it became an electronic magnet of sorts and reacted similar to a vacuum cleaner. The magnetic field grabbed the metal of the snowblower, pulling Foreman along. They estimated Foreman and the snowblower struck the dish at a speed of over 60,000 miles per second, thus exploding them instantly. Kellington is not being charged, since it was not intentional, but all of his television equipment is being held for investigation. Kellington refused to speak to reporters, except to say that he is so very sorry for what happened. Police investigators are considering the possibility of suing the manufacturer of both the satellite equipment, and the big screen television, but not until further analysis and research is done to determine the cause of the incident. Gary Hernandez - Reporter WEED Tv Inc. Ontario |
#5
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Man sucked into Satellite Dish explodes and dies
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#6
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Man sucked into Satellite Dish explodes and dies
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#7
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Man sucked into Satellite Dish explodes and dies
But, was the dish and equipment OK? wrote in message ... December 25, 2007 It began as a happy Christmas on 21st Avenue, but ended in trajedy. snip Gary Hernandez - Reporter WEED Tv Inc. Ontario |
#8
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Man sucked into Satellite Dish explodes and dies
On Dec 26, 4:10*pm, wrote:
December 25, 2007 It began as a happy Christmas on 21st Avenue, but ended in trajedy. Robert Kellington loved his television, and had at least one set in every room of the house, all connected to his satellite system. *On Christmas eve he got a 60 inch big screen television as a gift. *Early on Christmas morning he flipped on the kitchen tv, grabbed a bite to eat and went to the bathroom for personal needs. *While in the bathroom, he flipped on the bathroom tv set. *Both his son and daughter were watching cartoons in their bedrooms, and his wife was watching a church service on the 27 inch master bedroom television. Kellington went to the basement to get some tools, and immediately flipped on the basement tv, leaving it on as he came back upstairs and went to the living toom to connect the cable to his new big screen set. *He got the cable connected, and hit the power switch, just when his neighbor, Matthew Foreman was running a snowblower on his driveway, near the Kellington's satellite dish. * The moment Robert Kellington his the power switch on his new big screen tv, there was a power surge through the satellite dish, and his neighbor, Matthew Foreman was sucked into the dish, along with his snowblower. *Both him and the snowblower exploded as they smashed thru the center of the satellite dish, and were expelled out the rear in small pieces of flesh, bone, and metal, which were spread across an area several city blocks wide. * Police investigators later said there were 14 television sets turned on at the same time in the Kellington's home, and the surge of that big screen set created such a powerful burst of energy, it literally sucked Foreman into the dish, causing his instantanious death. *They went on to explain that the dish was sucking so much power it became an electronic magnet of sorts and reacted similar to a vacuum cleaner. The magnetic field grabbed the metal of the snowblower, pulling Foreman along. *They estimated Foreman and the snowblower struck the dish at a speed of over 60,000 miles per second, thus exploding them instantly. * Kellington is not being charged, since it was not intentional, but all of his television equipment is being held for investigation. Kellington refused to speak to reporters, except to say that he is so very sorry for what happened. * Police investigators are considering the possibility of suing the manufacturer of both the satellite equipment, and the big screen television, but not until further analysis and research is done to determine the cause of the incident. Gary Hernandez - Reporter WEED Tv Inc. Ontario Totally implausible story. As everyone knows, all TV stations in Ontario start with a "C" as in "CFTO". A "W" would be in US, east of the Mississippi. Duh. Don't bother to call Myth Busters. |
#9
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Man sucked into Satellite Dish explodes and dies
On Wed, 26 Dec 2007 15:10:07 -0600, wrote:
It began as a happy Christmas Aw. C'mon. April is still four month's away. |
#10
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Man sucked into Satellite Dish explodes and dies
Pat wrote:
On Dec 26, 4:10 pm, wrote: December 25, 2007 It began as a happy Christmas on 21st Avenue, but ended in trajedy. Robert Kellington loved his television, and had at least one set in every room of the house, all connected to his satellite system. On Christmas eve he got a 60 inch big screen television as a gift. Early on Christmas morning he flipped on the kitchen tv, grabbed a bite to eat and went to the bathroom for personal needs. While in the bathroom, he flipped on the bathroom tv set. Both his son and daughter were watching cartoons in their bedrooms, and his wife was watching a church service on the 27 inch master bedroom television. Kellington went to the basement to get some tools, and immediately flipped on the basement tv, leaving it on as he came back upstairs and went to the living toom to connect the cable to his new big screen set. He got the cable connected, and hit the power switch, just when his neighbor, Matthew Foreman was running a snowblower on his driveway, near the Kellington's satellite dish. The moment Robert Kellington his the power switch on his new big screen tv, there was a power surge through the satellite dish, and his neighbor, Matthew Foreman was sucked into the dish, along with his snowblower. Both him and the snowblower exploded as they smashed thru the center of the satellite dish, and were expelled out the rear in small pieces of flesh, bone, and metal, which were spread across an area several city blocks wide. Police investigators later said there were 14 television sets turned on at the same time in the Kellington's home, and the surge of that big screen set created such a powerful burst of energy, it literally sucked Foreman into the dish, causing his instantanious death. They went on to explain that the dish was sucking so much power it became an electronic magnet of sorts and reacted similar to a vacuum cleaner. The magnetic field grabbed the metal of the snowblower, pulling Foreman along. They estimated Foreman and the snowblower struck the dish at a speed of over 60,000 miles per second, thus exploding them instantly. Kellington is not being charged, since it was not intentional, but all of his television equipment is being held for investigation. Kellington refused to speak to reporters, except to say that he is so very sorry for what happened. Police investigators are considering the possibility of suing the manufacturer of both the satellite equipment, and the big screen television, but not until further analysis and research is done to determine the cause of the incident. Gary Hernandez - Reporter WEED Tv Inc. Ontario Totally implausible story. As everyone knows, all TV stations in Ontario start with a "C" as in "CFTO". A "W" would be in US, east of the Mississippi. Duh. Don't bother to call Myth Busters. Must have been the Ontario in Ohio, Wisconsin or New York. |
#11
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Man sucked into Satellite Dish explodes and dies
Pat wrote:
snip Totally implausible story. As everyone knows, all TV stations in Ontario start with a "C" as in "CFTO". A "W" would be in US, east of the Mississippi. Duh. What about WHO-TV in Des Moines, Iowa? Iowa is west of the Mississippi River, last time I looked on the map. |
#12
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Man sucked into Satellite Dish explodes and dies
user wrote:
Pat wrote: snip Totally implausible story. As everyone knows, all TV stations in Ontario start with a "C" as in "CFTO". A "W" would be in US, east of the Mississippi. Duh. What about WHO-TV in Des Moines, Iowa? Iowa is west of the Mississippi River, last time I looked on the map. The convention is: W = east, K = west. Those stations in existence before the regulation was adopted (1923) were allowed to keep their original designations and have popsicles for lunch. |
#13
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Man sucked into Satellite Dish explodes and dies
"user" wrote in message ... Pat wrote: snip Totally implausible story. As everyone knows, all TV stations in Ontario start with a "C" as in "CFTO". A "W" would be in US, east of the Mississippi. Duh. What about WHO-TV in Des Moines, Iowa? Iowa is west of the Mississippi River, last time I looked on the map. Or KDKA in Pittsburg, Pa....... |
#14
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Man sucked into Satellite Dish explodes and dies
To all with too much time....
What pap for half-baked brains. Be careful! Once long ago brains and eggs were a delicacy aboard railroad trains' dining cars. I'll take the eggs; the rest of you are stuck with your brains. Harley Harebrain "user" wrote in message ... Pat wrote: snip Totally implausible story. As everyone knows, all TV stations in Ontario start with a "C" as in "CFTO". A "W" would be in US, east of the Mississippi. Duh. What about WHO-TV in Des Moines, Iowa? Iowa is west of the Mississippi River, last time I looked on the map. |
#15
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Man sucked into Satellite Dish explodes and dies
Hey, it happened here too. Couple years ago Elvis was walking his dog
and eating a peanut butter and bananna sandwich out in front of my house when...... PaPaPeng wrote: On Wed, 26 Dec 2007 15:10:07 -0600, wrote: It began as a happy Christmas Aw. C'mon. April is still four month's away. -- "There's only one thing better than having a fishing boat, and that's having a buddy who has a fishing boat." |
#16
Posted to rec.arts.poems,alt.satellite.tv,alt.tv,alt.home.repair
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Man sucked into Satellite Dish explodes and dies
On Tue, 15 Jan 2008 20:06:53 GMT, willshak
wrote general bull****: The only real truth is found in the Koran at 34:13.22a(2) wherein it states: "And it shall come to pass that the followers of Mohammed (may he rot in his casket wrapped in the ballsack of a pig) shall always have their way with their goats and camels as the goat and camel will always have lesser backhair than his two-bagger woman. And shall he hide the dick so small beneath the toga wrapped around his slender legs as they bend in anticipation of entry by his father/uncle as they are both the same man. Yea shall he utter God is Great as he strokes his dick so small and deposits his DNA into the innards of the goat, camel, or woman, for it shall matter not which of them he chooses dost they all have the sphincter as if it were one. Then shall he understand that only one must take the young boy and the camel to be as great as Mohammed as he is known for shores everywhere as the fag of Baghdad, the tonsil of Tunisia, the poker of Greece. And shall he keep the goat close by to take the cameldung from his dick so small. And Allah sjhall be watching, and watching carefully from above as he wanks to the sight of Mohammed and his goat." |
#17
Posted to rec.models.rockets,alt.satellite.tv,alt.tv,alt.home.repair
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Man sucked into Satellite Dish explodes and dies
As Jesus would say to the author, concerning the title:
Go yea and do likewise. -Larry (This devil can be cast out only with constant prayer and fasting) C. "Roger_N" wrote in message ... et contradicentem.141 That God would strike them with blindness, and in full noon they would grope like the blind; and that a forerunner would go before Him. 736. Transfixerunt.[142] Zech. 12:10. That a deliverer should come, who would crush the demon's head, and free His people from their sins, ex omnibus iniquitatibus;[143] that there should be a New Covenant, which would be eternal; that there should be another priesthood after the order of Melchisedek, and it should be eternal; that the Christ should be glorious, mighty, strong, and yet so poor that He would not be recognised, nor taken for what He is, but rejected and slain; that His people who denied Him should no longer be His people; that the idolaters should receive Him, and take refuge in Him; that He should leave Zion to reign in the centre of idolatry; that nevertheless the Jews should continue for ever; that He should be of Judah, and when there should be no longer a king. SECTION XII: PROOFS OF JESUS CHRIST 737. There |
#18
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Man sucked into Satellite Dish explodes and dies
sucked Foreman into the dish, causing his instantanious death. They
Gary Hernandez - Reporter WEED Tv Inc. Ontario Hmmm....Great story. But how come I can't get WEED Tv, Inc to come up in Google? How come "instantaneous" is mis-spelled? Hmmm.... |
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