Several on this list seem to enjoy solving problems using specially
designed and built machinery.

The link below may give you some new ideas.

Since this is an open list, the link below requires the obvious edit
to become functioning.

http://www.f**kingmachines.com/

Lew

On May 4, 5:44*pm, "Lew Hodgett" wrote:
Several on this list seem to enjoy solving problems using specially
designed and built machinery.

The link below may give you some new ideas.

Since this is an open list, the link below requires the obvious edit
to become functioning.

http://www.f**kingmachines.com/

Lew

WTF? No Festool?

On May 4, 5:44*pm, "Lew Hodgett" wrote:
Several on this list seem to enjoy solving problems using specially
designed and built machinery.

The link below may give you some new ideas.

Since this is an open list, the link below requires the obvious edit
to become functioning.

http://www.f**kingmachines.com/

Fireblocking machines? I always use a caulking gun.

R

"Robatoy" wrote:

WTF? No Festool?

Festool wasn't needed for what I reviewed.

Remember the lyric:

There was a big freakin machine,

It was powered by steam,

Had a big freakin wheel,

Hooked it up to a big prick of steel,

Around and around went that big freakin wheel,

In and out went that big prick of steel,

Until at last the maiden cried,

That she was very well satisfied.

Ahh but alas the sadist part is this,

There was no way of stopping it,

So around and around until she was split,

And the whole freakin thing was covered in ****.

Lew

On May 4, 6:25*pm, "Lew Hodgett" wrote:
"Robatoy" wrote:

WTF? No Festool?

Festool wasn't needed for what I reviewed.

Remember the lyric:

There was a big freakin machine,

http://www.folklore.ms/html/songs_so...ng_machine.htm

R

"RicodJour" wrote:

http://www.folklore.ms/html/songs_so...ng_machine.htm

Thank You.

Obviously had misplaced a few words over the years.

Lew

On May 4, 7:12*pm, "Lew Hodgett" wrote:
"RicodJour" wrote:

http://www.folklore.ms/html/songs_so...usic/f/the_fuc...

Thank You.

Obviously had misplaced a few words over the years.

Lew

You recalled it very accurately, and I would imagine that there are
different lyrics and embellishments.

R

"RicodJour" wrote:
...................................
You recalled it very accurately, and I would imagine that there are
different lyrics and embellishments.

First time I heard that diddy I wasn't old enough to vote, which would
be the Kennedy-Nixon race.

Oh how time flies.

Lew

On 5/4/2009 3:54 PM RicodJour spake thus:

On May 4, 6:25 pm, "Lew Hodgett" wrote:
"Robatoy" wrote:

WTF? No Festool?

Festool wasn't needed for what I reviewed.

Remember the lyric:

There was a big freakin machine,

http://www.folklore.ms/html/songs_so...ng_machine.htm

Sorry to complain, but that site is *far* from complete. Why, they
didn't have "Barnacle Bill". Not even "Great Big Gobs of Greasy Grimy
Gopher Guts".


--
Save the Planet
Kill Yourself

- motto of the Church of Euthanasia (http://www.churchofeuthanasia.org/)

"David Nebenzahl" wrote:

Sorry to complain, but that site is *far* from complete. Why, they
didn't have "Barnacle Bill". Not even "Great Big Gobs of Greasy
Grimy Gopher Guts".
================================
Godiva

Now Godiva was a lady who thru Coventry did ride,

For all the village to see her clean and lily white hide,

And of all the men assembled,

Was an engineer of coarse,

The only one who noticed that Godiva rode a horse.


Chorus:

We are, we are, we are the engineers,

We can, we can, we can demolish forty beers,

Drink rum, drink rum, drink rum and come away with us,

For we don't give a damn, for any damn man,

Who doesn't give a damn for us.

On May 5, 1:22*am, "Lew Hodgett" wrote:
"David Nebenzahl" wrote:
Sorry to complain, but that site is *far* from complete. Why, they
didn't have "Barnacle Bill". Not even "Great Big Gobs of Greasy
Grimy Gopher Guts".

================================
Godiva

Now Godiva was a lady who thru Coventry did ride,

For all the village to see her clean and lily white hide,

And of all the men assembled,

Was an engineer of coarse,

The only one who noticed that Godiva rode a horse.

Chorus:

We are, we are, we are the engineers,

We can, we can, we can demolish forty beers,

Drink rum, drink rum, drink rum and come away with us,

For we don't give a damn, for any damn man,

Who doesn't give a damn for us.

Yup, still an annual ritual at my Alma Mater. Real girl, real horse...
and your usual band of diesel-dyke protesters.
Fun times, fun times.

"David Nebenzahl" wrote:

Sorry to complain, but that site is *far* from complete. Why, they
didn't have "Barnacle Bill". Not even "Great Big Gobs of Greasy
Grimy Gopher Guts".

Punch either one into Google for a full set of lyrics.

Have fun.

Lew

On May 5, 3:43*pm, "Lew Hodgett" wrote:
"David Nebenzahl" wrote:
Sorry to complain, but that site is *far* from complete. Why, they
didn't have "Barnacle Bill". Not even "Great Big Gobs of Greasy
Grimy Gopher Guts".

Punch either one into Google for a full set of lyrics.

Have fun.

Lew

My all-time favourite:
The North Atlantic Squadron

cho: Away, away, with fyfe and drum,
Here we come, full of rum,
Looking for women to pat on the bum
In the North Atlantic Squadron.

The firefighters have lots of fire,
They never, never seem to tire
Of pulling their hose, and pulling their wire
In the North Atlantic Squadron.

The service police are a bunch of sluts,
They should be hung up by their nuts,
A bunch of hicks from out of the sticks
In the North Atlantic Squadron.

Into the mess we go to sup,
A dirty plate, a dirty cup,
The cooks should ****ing well smarten up
In the North Atlantic Squadron.

The wireless boys they fly so high,
I wish to hell that they would die,
Their da da dits give us the ****s
In the North Atlantic Squadron.

When we were ten miles out to sea
The Pilot started buggery
His only joy was the wireless boy
In the North Atlantic Squadron.

The One Six One crew Number Four,
Went out one night to find a whore;
Their only hope was a nanny goat
In the North Atlantic Squadron.

When in Vera Cruz we touched,
We found that Kingston whores were such,
That when open wide you could put inside
The North Atlantic Squadron.

In Newfoundland when it got hot,
We used to fornicate a lot,
Only the fools would be pulling their tools
In the North AtLantic Squadron.

The native girls are all misfits,
They have no teeth, they have no tits,
No wonder they give us the ****s
In the North Atlantic Squadron.

The sergeants they are on the bit,
Giving tbe ACs lots of ****.
After the war their throats we'll slit
In the North Atlantic Squadron.

In Gaspe it rained all the time,
The sun was never known to shine,
The fog was so thick you could set it in bricks
In the North Atlantic Squadron.

The officers they know **** all,
As up the CO's arse they crawl.
What do they get but sweet **** all
In the North Atlantic Squadron.

The civvies in the Ferry Command
Are always jerking off by hand.
They're the ****ing scourge of this fair land
In the North Atlantic Squadron.

The Ferry Command from Montreal,
What do they bring but sweet **** all.
Whatever the date, they're always late
In the North Atlantic Squadron.

The American boys we do admire,
They fly through **** and snow and fire,
They never never seem to tire
In the North Atlantic Squadron.

By Ottawa we're really stumped,
You know they are a bunch of ****s;
Their nuts should be nailed to the nearest stump
In the North Atlantic Squadron.

If I had a girl and she were mine
Upon her arse I'd paint a sign-
"Try this for size, it's really fine"
In the North Atlantic Squadron

The works and bricks are a bunch of pricks,
They feed the fire with wood and sticks;
They leave us all in a hell of a fix
In the North Atlantic Squadron.

The Northern Electric put up poles;
They should be shoved up their arseholes.
They stay inside when it is cold
In the North Atlantic Squadron.

The medical corps are a bunch of whores,
They should be hung up by their drawers.
They give you pills and you **** for hours
In the North Atlantic Squadron.

The ****ing discips give us the pips,
All of them are full of ****.
From arsehole to breakfast they should be slit
In the North Atlantic Squadron.

The dear old WAAFs, I hope they'll come,
And then we'll pat them on the bum;
And in the bushes our work will be done
In the North Atlantic Squadron.

There was a girl from Montreal,
She spread her legs from wall to wall.
With every jump I made her call
For the North Atlantic Squadron.

The RAF are on the bit,
Giving Hitler lots of ****,
And after the war they'll talk about it
And the North Atlantic Squadron.

In Labrador we used to sit,
In the mess and shoot the ****,
With ****all to do but swallow it
In the North Atlantic Squadron.

The boys from stores went out to ****,
Their streams and spray they went amiss-
They said that they could drown with this
The North Atlantic Squadron.

Those MT men are reckless birds,
They roar around like crazy turds.
They smash up trucks with very few words
In the North Atlantic Squadron.

The girls of Gaspe town are bags,
They always seem to wear their rags;
And if they don't, their pussy sags
From the North Atlantic Squadron.

A lazy crowd are the ******* clerks,
They **** around like a bunch of jerks.
They **** around but they never work
In the North Atlantic Squadron.

The aircrew boys they all had chills,
They took some green artillery pills;
They **** from Yarmouth to Gander Hills
In the North Atlantic Squadron.

On May 5, 4:26*pm, Robatoy wrote:
On May 5, 3:43*pm, "Lew Hodgett" wrote:

"David Nebenzahl" wrote:
Sorry to complain, but that site is *far* from complete. Why, they
didn't have "Barnacle Bill". Not even "Great Big Gobs of Greasy
Grimy Gopher Guts".

Punch either one into Google for a full set of lyrics.

Have fun.

Lew

My all-time favourite:
The North Atlantic Squadron

cho: Away, away, with fyfe and drum,
* * *Here we come, full of rum,
* * *Looking for women to pat on the bum
* * *In the North Atlantic Squadron.

The firefighters have lots of fire,
They never, never seem to tire
Of pulling their hose, and pulling their wire
In the North Atlantic Squadron.

The service police are a bunch of sluts,
They should be hung up by their nuts,
A bunch of hicks from out of the sticks
In the North Atlantic Squadron.

Into the mess we go to sup,
A dirty plate, a dirty cup,
The cooks should ****ing well smarten up
In the North Atlantic Squadron.

The wireless boys they fly so high,
I wish to hell that they would die,
Their da da dits give us the ****s
In the North Atlantic Squadron.

When we were ten miles out to sea
The Pilot started buggery
His only joy was the wireless boy
In the North Atlantic Squadron.

The One Six One crew Number Four,
Went out one night to find a whore;
Their only hope was a nanny goat
In the North Atlantic Squadron.

When in Vera Cruz we touched,
We found that Kingston whores were such,
That when open wide you could put inside
The North Atlantic Squadron.

In Newfoundland when it got hot,
We used to fornicate a lot,
Only the fools would be pulling their tools
In the North AtLantic Squadron.

The native girls are all misfits,
They have no teeth, they have no tits,
No wonder they give us the ****s
In the North Atlantic Squadron.

The sergeants they are on the bit,
Giving tbe ACs lots of ****.
After the war their throats we'll slit
In the North Atlantic Squadron.

In Gaspe it rained all the time,
The sun was never known to shine,
The fog was so thick you could set it in bricks
In the North Atlantic Squadron.

The officers they know **** all,
As up the CO's arse they crawl.
What do they get but sweet **** all
In the North Atlantic Squadron.

The civvies in the Ferry Command
Are always jerking off by hand.
They're the ****ing scourge of this fair land
In the North Atlantic Squadron.

The Ferry Command from Montreal,
What do they bring but sweet **** all.
Whatever the date, they're always late
In the North Atlantic Squadron.

The American boys we do admire,
They fly through **** and snow and fire,
They never never seem to tire
In the North Atlantic Squadron.

By Ottawa we're really stumped,
You know they are a bunch of ****s;
Their nuts should be nailed to the nearest stump
In the North Atlantic Squadron.

If I had a girl and she were mine
Upon her arse I'd paint a sign-
"Try this for size, it's really fine"
In the North Atlantic Squadron

The works and bricks are a bunch of pricks,
They feed the fire with wood and sticks;
They leave us all in a hell of a fix
In the North Atlantic Squadron.

The Northern Electric put up poles;
They should be shoved up their arseholes.
They stay inside when it is cold
In the North Atlantic Squadron.

The medical corps are a bunch of whores,
They should be hung up by their drawers.
They give you pills and you **** for hours
In the North Atlantic Squadron.

The ****ing discips give us the pips,
All of them are full of ****.
From arsehole to breakfast they should be slit
In the North Atlantic Squadron.

The dear old WAAFs, I hope they'll come,
And then we'll pat them on the bum;
And in the bushes our work will be done
In the North Atlantic Squadron.

There was a girl from Montreal,
She spread her legs from wall to wall.
With every jump I made her call
For the North Atlantic Squadron.

The RAF are on the bit,
Giving Hitler lots of ****,
And after the war they'll talk about it
And the North Atlantic Squadron.

In Labrador we used to sit,
In the mess and shoot the ****,
With ****all to do but swallow it
In the North Atlantic Squadron.

The boys from stores went out to ****,
Their streams and spray they went amiss-
They said that they could drown with this
The North Atlantic Squadron.

Those MT men are reckless birds,
They roar around like crazy turds.
They smash up trucks with very few words
In the North Atlantic Squadron.

The girls of Gaspe town are bags,
They always seem to wear their rags;
And if they don't, their pussy sags
From the North Atlantic Squadron.

A lazy crowd are the ******* clerks,
They **** around like a bunch of jerks.
They **** around but they never work
In the North Atlantic Squadron.

The aircrew boys they all had chills,
They took some green artillery pills;
They **** from Yarmouth to Gander Hills
In the North Atlantic Squadron.

And, of course:
The Eighteen Pounder


Load her up and bang away
Load her up and bang away
Load'er up and bang away
With my 18 pounder.

Well up she came and down she got
Then she show me her you know what
Asked if me if I'd like a shot
With my eighteen pounder

I tried her box, I found it blocked
So I tried the back door, found locked
I just went off half cocked
With my eighteen pounder

Then I took her to a shady dell
I released my safety bang like hell
I missed the bulls eye but I drilled the well
With my eighteen pounder

So I took her down by the docks
I sighted at her pretty box
I missed the box but I crushed the rocks
With my eighteen pounder

Two hot barrels in the bed
I missed her snatch and I hit her head
It ricochet and killed her dead
With my eighteen pounder

Then I took her to the burial ground
I dug a hole and laid her down
And just for practice one more round
With my eighteen pounder