I built myself a nice new boat shed ... specifically so my boat would be
under cover & kept clean & dry.
This is a 'gallows post & beam' construction so open to front and one side
(desirable for airflow)


This year a pair of swallows arrived .... and my boat & everything in the
boat house is covered with bird crap .... I mean serious piles of it on top
of all horizontal surface ....
I had to staple temporary plastic sheeting on underside of trusses where the
boat goes ... to minimize the crap ........... the sheet is now covered
with it.

The little sods (and there are now 2 offspring with them) also take to
perching on any part of the boat and crapping on it.

I am an animal & nature lover, but cannot put up with this next year
.......... my wife has also lost patience, and today asked me to go shoot
them they are making so much mess, all over the new drive and the cars as
well.

I know they are supposed to have migrated in August ... seems message has
not got to them, we are being dived bombed, and high speed fly-past's by the
things whenever we are near.

Once they go I'll remove the nest and as much crap as I can ... but I need
to stop them coming back .... any suggestions.


Best I have found via Google is to have a model owl ... near entrance,
supposed to keep them away.

(Maybe I should tie our cat to a rafter .... it serves no purpose in life,
and just costs money to feed. )

Rick Hughes wrote:

Once they go I'll remove the nest and as much crap as I can ... but
I need to stop them coming back .... any suggestions.

Dunno. But I have a couple of swifts that I would like to stop nesting on a
certain house.


(Maybe I should tie our cat to a rafter .... it serves no purpose in
life, and just costs money to feed. )

Well yes, that's old news.

http://s428.photobucket.com/albums/q...ent=img077.jpg

--
Adam

"ARWadsworth" wrote in message
...
Rick Hughes wrote:

Once they go I'll remove the nest and as much crap as I can ... but
I need to stop them coming back .... any suggestions.

Dunno. But I have a couple of swifts that I would like to stop nesting on
a certain house.


(Maybe I should tie our cat to a rafter .... it serves no purpose in
life, and just costs money to feed. )

Well yes, that's old news.

http://s428.photobucket.com/albums/q...ent=img077.jpg

--
Adam


Maybe some netting hanging down along the open ends,suspend it from poles so
it just slides back when access required.

"Rick Hughes" wrote in message
...
I built myself a nice new boat shed ... specifically so my boat would be
under cover & kept clean & dry.
This is a 'gallows post & beam' construction so open to front and one side
(desirable for airflow)


This year a pair of swallows arrived .... and my boat & everything in the
boat house is covered with bird crap .... I mean serious piles of it on
top of all horizontal surface ....
I had to staple temporary plastic sheeting on underside of trusses where
the boat goes ... to minimize the crap ........... the sheet is now
covered with it.

The little sods (and there are now 2 offspring with them) also take to
perching on any part of the boat and crapping on it.

I am an animal & nature lover, but cannot put up with this next year
......... my wife has also lost patience, and today asked me to go shoot
them they are making so much mess, all over the new drive and the cars as
well.

I know they are supposed to have migrated in August ... seems message has
not got to them, we are being dived bombed, and high speed fly-past's by
the things whenever we are near.

Once they go I'll remove the nest and as much crap as I can ... but I
need to stop them coming back .... any suggestions.


Best I have found via Google is to have a model owl ... near entrance,
supposed to keep them away.

(Maybe I should tie our cat to a rafter .... it serves no purpose in life,
and just costs money to feed. )

Please take a breath and a step backward.
Try to realise how remarkable these little creatures are.
For, little creatures is what they are. Living, alive and you have them
living with you.
I'm not a twitcher but have lived with swifts, swallows and martins all my
life.
Yes, they do crap on whatever is beneath. So do I, you and HM the Q.

You can cover your boat and it will be clean but only whilst you have that
boat. You will change your boat.
Consider yourself blessed that these little rascals have chosen to live with
you.
This time of year they will have probably scarpered anyway.
I think there is no finer sight than watching the youngsters earning and
getting theit wings. Wonderful sight late of a summers day. Preparing for a
very long journey.
Saddest thing for me is the sight of hatchlings that have fallen from the
nest Always saddens me. Always.

Cherish them, or get a shotgun. If you already have one, use it.
It appears from your post that you don't much care for wildlife.

Is this a diy matter.

N

On Sep 11, 6:59*pm, "ARWadsworth"
wrote:
Rick Hughes wrote:
Once they go I'll remove the nest and as much crap as I can ... *but
I need to stop them coming back .... * any suggestions.

Dunno. But I have a couple of swifts that I would like to stop nesting on a
certain house.

(Maybe I should tie our cat to a rafter .... it serves no purpose in
life, and just costs money to feed. )

Well yes, that's old news.

http://s428.photobucket.com/albums/q...on=view&curren....


You're both lucky buggers - send them over here - I'd love to see
swallows flitting about in the dusk. But I appreciate that in the
wrong place they are a pest.

--
Halmyre

Rick Hughes :
I built myself a nice new boat shed ... specifically so my boat would
be under cover & kept clean & dry.
This is a 'gallows post & beam' construction so open to front and one
side (desirable for airflow)


This year a pair of swallows arrived .... and my boat & everything in
the boat house is covered with bird crap .... I mean serious piles of
it on top of all horizontal surface ....
I had to staple temporary plastic sheeting on underside of trusses
where the boat goes ... to minimize the crap ........... the sheet is
now covered with it.

The little sods (and there are now 2 offspring with them) also take to
perching on any part of the boat and crapping on it.

I am an animal & nature lover, but cannot put up with this next year
......... my wife has also lost patience, and today asked me to go
shoot them they are making so much mess, all over the new drive and the
cars as well.

I know they are supposed to have migrated in August ... seems message
has not got to them, we are being dived bombed, and high speed fly-
past's by the things whenever we are near.

Once they go I'll remove the nest and as much crap as I can ... but I
need to stop them coming back .... any suggestions.


Best I have found via Google is to have a model owl ... near entrance,
supposed to keep them away.

(Maybe I should tie our cat to a rafter .... it serves no purpose in
life, and just costs money to feed. )

We must have at least a dozen swallows in our stables. The mess and the
smell are a bit unpleasant but I love seeing them flying around so I put
up with it. But I can see how others might not want to.

Knocking the nests off will do no good because they'll have made a new
one before you know it.

I'm guessing that you have a pitched roof and they're nesting under it.
I'd try putting a horizontal net across at eaves level, before they come
back next spring. Make sure you don't leave any gaps of more than a
couple of cm.

--
Mike Barnes

On Sun, 11 Sep 2011 18:59:29 +0100, "ARWadsworth"
wrote:

Dunno. But I have a couple of swifts that I would like to stop nesting on a
certain house.

Contact http://www.swift-conservation.org/ who will tell you of a
number of ways of both keeping the swifts and protecting the house.

On Sep 11, 6:48*pm, "Rick Hughes"
wrote:
I built myself a nice new boat shed ... specifically so my boat would be
under cover & kept clean & dry.
This is a 'gallows post & beam' construction so open to front and one side
(desirable for airflow)

This year a pair of swallows arrived .... and my boat & everything in the
boat house is covered with bird crap .... I mean serious piles of it on top
of all horizontal surface ....
I had to staple temporary plastic sheeting on underside of trusses where the
boat goes ... to minimize the crap ........... *the sheet is now covered
with it.

The little sods (and there are now 2 offspring with them) *also take to
perching on any part of the boat and crapping on it.

I am an animal & nature lover, but cannot put up with this next year
......... my wife has also lost patience, and today asked me to go shoot
them they are making so much mess, all over the new drive and the cars as
well.

I know they are supposed to have migrated in August ... seems message has
not got to them, we are being dived bombed, and high speed fly-past's by the
things whenever we are near.

Once they go I'll remove the nest and as much crap as I can ... *but I need
to stop them coming back .... * any suggestions.

Best I have found via Google is to have a model owl ... near entrance,
supposed to keep them away.

(Maybe I should tie our cat to a rafter .... it serves no purpose in life,
and just costs money to feed. )

Chicken wire over the air gaps.

"Rick Hughes" wrote in message
...
I built myself a nice new boat shed ... specifically so my boat would be
under cover & kept clean & dry.
This is a 'gallows post & beam' construction so open to front and one side
(desirable for airflow)


This year a pair of swallows arrived .... and my boat & everything in the
boat house is covered with bird crap .... I mean serious piles of it on
top of all horizontal surface ....
I had to staple temporary plastic sheeting on underside of trusses where
the boat goes ... to minimize the crap ........... the sheet is now
covered with it.

The little sods (and there are now 2 offspring with them) also take to
perching on any part of the boat and crapping on it.

I am an animal & nature lover, but cannot put up with this next year
......... my wife has also lost patience, and today asked me to go shoot
them they are making so much mess, all over the new drive and the cars as
well.

I know they are supposed to have migrated in August ... seems message has
not got to them, we are being dived bombed, and high speed fly-past's by
the things whenever we are near.

Once they go I'll remove the nest and as much crap as I can ... but I
need to stop them coming back .... any suggestions.


Best I have found via Google is to have a model owl ... near entrance,
supposed to keep them away.
(Maybe I should tie our cat to a rafter .... it serves no purpose in
life,
and just costs money to feed. )


You might take a look here to see what you can and can't do within the law.

http://www.rspb.org.uk/Images/WBATL_tcm9-132998.pdf

Peter Crosland

Peter Parry wrote:
On Sun, 11 Sep 2011 18:59:29 +0100, "ARWadsworth"
wrote:

Dunno. But I have a couple of swifts that I would like to stop
nesting on a certain house.

Contact http://www.swift-conservation.org/ who will tell you of a
number of ways of both keeping the swifts and protecting the house.

If I could just get them to move to the left a bit so that they did not ****
on you as you went through the door I would be happy:-)

--
Adam

On Sun, 11 Sep 2011 21:28:33 +0100, "Nick"
wrote:

Cherish them, or get a shotgun. If you already have one, use it.

Good advice.

It appears from your post that you don't much care for wildlife.

Wildlife is fine in its place, on a plate.

Is this a diy matter.

Pulling the trigger is always diy.

On 12/09/2011 09:00, Peter Crosland wrote:
"Rick wrote in message
...
I built myself a nice new boat shed ... specifically so my boat would be
under cover& kept clean& dry.
This is a 'gallows post& beam' construction so open to front and one side
(desirable for airflow)


This year a pair of swallows arrived .... and my boat& everything in the
boat house is covered with bird crap .... I mean serious piles of it on
top of all horizontal surface ....
I had to staple temporary plastic sheeting on underside of trusses where
the boat goes ... to minimize the crap ........... the sheet is now
covered with it.

The little sods (and there are now 2 offspring with them) also take to
perching on any part of the boat and crapping on it.

I am an animal& nature lover, but cannot put up with this next year
......... my wife has also lost patience, and today asked me to go shoot
them they are making so much mess, all over the new drive and the cars as
well.

I know they are supposed to have migrated in August ... seems message has
not got to them, we are being dived bombed, and high speed fly-past's by
the things whenever we are near.

Once they go I'll remove the nest and as much crap as I can ... but I
need to stop them coming back .... any suggestions.


Best I have found via Google is to have a model owl ... near entrance,
supposed to keep them away.
(Maybe I should tie our cat to a rafter .... it serves no purpose in
life,
and just costs money to feed. )


You might take a look here to see what you can and can't do within the law.

http://www.rspb.org.uk/Images/WBATL_tcm9-132998.pdf

Peter Crosland

While I am generally in favour of protecting birds. I think that it is
wrong that where birds are causing a problem (for instance my parents
had a nest directly above their front door and as well as the mess
getting into the house, it was treacherously slippery on the step), that
the occupier must "make an application", "show that other alternatives
have been considered" and organise for an "authorised person" all at
their cost, simply to get rid of an obvious hazard that is not of their
making.

SteveW

"Rick Hughes" wrote:
[snip]

Best I have found via Google is to have a model owl ... near entrance,
supposed to keep them away.

(Maybe I should tie our cat to a rafter .... it serves no purpose in
life, and just costs money to feed. )

Possibly the best that you can do is to catch the birds, skewer them and
cook them over charcoal. Mind you I like swallows so I would leave them
alone.

It's a dilemma that women are familiar with. Spit or swallow?

On Mon, 12 Sep 2011 22:24:06 +0100, Steve Walker
wrote:


While I am generally in favour of protecting birds. I think that it is
wrong that where birds are causing a problem (for instance my parents
had a nest directly above their front door and as well as the mess
getting into the house, it was treacherously slippery on the step), that
the occupier must "make an application", "show that other alternatives
have been considered" and organise for an "authorised person" all at
their cost, simply to get rid of an obvious hazard that is not of their
making.

It usually isn't that difficult to persuade the birds to move a bit to
the left (or right) and so maintain both a clear path and a nest for
a bird which is in decline. Imagination is surely the one element
which puts the best DIYer above the plodding apparachnik and something
we should use to best effect.

You're both lucky buggers - send them over here - I'd love to see
swallows flitting about in the dusk. But I appreciate that in the
wrong place they are a pest.

I agree the 4 of them are very acrobatic, ... it's just they crap so much my
nice new outbuilding is now a filthy health hazard.

Yes, they do crap on whatever is beneath. So do I, you and HM the Q.

You can cover your boat and it will be clean but only whilst you have that
boat. You will change your boat.
Consider yourself blessed that these little rascals have chosen to live
with you.
This time of year they will have probably scarpered anyway.
I think there is no finer sight than watching the youngsters earning and




Yes this is a diy matter .... I want to do something myself that will stop
the sods returning.
I appreciate your points above, and I have foxes, rabbits, frogs all visit
my garden on regular basis ... and I'm happy to leave them alone.

For me this is a £30k boat & building investment... that is being seriously
covered in crap by some wild birds .. that I do not want.
I don't want to cover boat ... this was whole point in spending several
thousand building my boat store .... so that I could leave covers off it,
otherwise you trap in damp air and things go mouldy.

I don't want to kill the birds, although I have considered shooting them -
after having to wash boat down before use ! I will let them be until they
move off, but I sure as hell want to stop them coming back.

They are still there ... all 4 of them crapping everywhere today as normal
..... maybe I should put a holiday program on radio to drop hint for them to
migrate.


As to your point about the Queen ... I'm not English, and would feel just as
peeved if the Queen was crapping on my boat.

"harry" wrote in message
...
On Sep 11, 6:48 pm, "Rick Hughes"


Chicken wire over the air gaps.

This is an open roof .. no ceiling so ... I would have to cover 10m x 7m
.... and that is a lot of chicken wire .... and in any event it would then
stop my access to roof area where I store a lot of kit.

In article
,
Steve Firth wrote:
Possibly the best that you can do is to catch the birds,
skewer them and cook them over charcoal. Mind you I like
swallows so I would leave them alone.
I also like swallows but I've not tried them on a barbecue.

--
John Mulrooney
NOTE Email address IS correct but might not be checked for a while.

The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on the list

In message , Rick Hughes
writes

"harry" wrote in message
...
On Sep 11, 6:48 pm, "Rick Hughes"


Chicken wire over the air gaps.

This is an open roof .. no ceiling so ... I would have to cover 10m x
7m ... and that is a lot of chicken wire .... and in any event it would
then stop my access to roof area where I store a lot of kit.

I think you probably only need to discourage them in the first few weeks
after arrival, when they are pairing up and choosing nest sites.
Say April to halfway through May.

Although the rules say you are not allowed to damage nests I don't see
that removing a tablespoonful of mud from your beams could lead to
prosecution. You need to make them believe somewhere else might be more
suitable:-)

I have lots nesting here in stables and old barns. The nest is usually
in an alcove of some sort, next to an upright on a horizontal beam
perhaps. Could you reduce *alcove* availability?

regards



--
Tim Lamb

On 12/09/2011 22:46, Peter Parry wrote:
On Mon, 12 Sep 2011 22:24:06 +0100, Steve Walker
wrote:


While I am generally in favour of protecting birds. I think that it is
wrong that where birds are causing a problem (for instance my parents
had a nest directly above their front door and as well as the mess
getting into the house, it was treacherously slippery on the step), that
the occupier must "make an application", "show that other alternatives
have been considered" and organise for an "authorised person" all at
their cost, simply to get rid of an obvious hazard that is not of their
making.

It usually isn't that difficult to persuade the birds to move a bit to
the left (or right) and so maintain both a clear path and a nest for
a bird which is in decline. Imagination is surely the one element
which puts the best DIYer above the plodding apparachnik and something
we should use to best effect.

Which is basically what they did - blocking the entrance while they were
both out. I think that that is technically illegal though.

SteveW

"Rick Hughes" wrote in message
...
I built myself a nice new boat shed ... specifically so my boat would be
under cover & kept clean & dry.
This is a 'gallows post & beam' construction so open to front and one side
(desirable for airflow)


This year a pair of swallows arrived .... and my boat & everything in the
boat house is covered with bird crap .... I mean serious piles of it on
top of all horizontal surface ....
I had to staple temporary plastic sheeting on underside of trusses where
the boat goes ... to minimize the crap ........... the sheet is now
covered with it.




After having to clean out another load of bird crap ..... and it's Sept. and
according to those that know they should have migrated in August.

If this carries on they are heading for a lead injection.

In message

, Steve Firth writes
"Rick Hughes" wrote:
[snip]

Best I have found via Google is to have a model owl ... near entrance,
supposed to keep them away.

(Maybe I should tie our cat to a rafter .... it serves no purpose in
life, and just costs money to feed. )

Possibly the best that you can do is to catch the birds, skewer them and
cook them over charcoal. Mind you I like swallows so I would leave them
alone.

It's a dilemma that women are familiar with. Spit or swallow?

Yeah, but you're advocating swallow on a spit


--
geoff