Paraphrased from elsewhere.

There recently was an article in the daily rag The Business Section asked
readers for ideas on: "How Would You Fix the Economy?" I think this bloke
nailed it!



Dear Mr. Osbourne,

Please find below my suggestion for fixing Britain's economy. Instead of
giving billions of pounds to companies that will squander the money on
lavish parties and unearned bonuses, use the following plan.
You can call it the "Patriotic Retirement Plan":

There are some 20 million people over 50 in the work force. Pay them £1
million apiece severance for early retirement with the following
stipulations:

1) They MUST retire. Twenty million job openings - Unemployment fixed.

2) They MUST buy a new British car (or as near as damn it). Twenty million
cars ordered - car industry fixed.

3) They MUST either buy a house or pay off their mortgage - housing crisis
fixed.

It can't get any easier than that!

P.S. If more money is needed, have all members of Parliament, bankers pay
'tax exiles' their taxes.

In message , Un-believer
writes
Paraphrased from elsewhere.

There recently was an article in the daily rag The Business Section asked
readers for ideas on: "How Would You Fix the Economy?" I think this bloke
nailed it!



Dear Mr. Osbourne,

Please find below my suggestion for fixing Britain's economy. Instead of
giving billions of pounds to companies that will squander the money on
lavish parties and unearned bonuses, use the following plan.
You can call it the "Patriotic Retirement Plan":

There are some 20 million people over 50 in the work force. Pay them £1
million apiece severance for early retirement with the following
stipulations:

1) They MUST retire. Twenty million job openings - Unemployment fixed.

If I retired, it would throw 6 people on the dole


2) They MUST buy a new British car (or as near as damn it). Twenty million
cars ordered - car industry fixed.

Just done that


3) They MUST either buy a house

Just done that

do I get £666,667 for getting 2/3rds right?



--
geoff

On Sun, 05 Jun 2011 21:41:39 +0100, Un-believer wrote:

Paraphrased from elsewhere.
....
There are some 20 million people over 50 in the work force. Pay them £1
million apiece

Shouldn't that be a million *Dollars* apeice? :-)

http://www.snopes.com/politics/business/fixeconomy.asp


--
John Stumbles

When you believe in things that you don't understand then you suffer.
Superstition ain't the way. (Steve Wonder)

Un-believer wrote:
1) They MUST retire. Twenty million job openings - Unemployment fixed.

Define "retire". There is no way I am going to allow somebody
to forcably stop me doing that work that *I* want to do. In fact,
I want to retire so I can get on with my work.

JGH

On Jun 6, 1:08*am, jgharston wrote:
Un-believer wrote:
1) They MUST retire. Twenty million job openings - Unemployment fixed.

Define "retire". There is no way I am going to allow somebody
to forcably stop me doing that work that *I* want to do. In fact,
I want to retire so I can get on with my work.

JGH

I have never been busier since I retired.

On Jun 5, 9:41*pm, "Un-believer" wrote:
Paraphrased from elsewhere.

There recently was an article in the daily rag The Business Section asked
readers for ideas on: "How Would You Fix the Economy?" I think this bloke
nailed it!

Dear Mr. Osbourne,

Please find below my suggestion for fixing Britain's economy. Instead of
giving billions of pounds to companies that will squander the money on
lavish parties and unearned bonuses, use the following plan.
You can call it the "Patriotic Retirement Plan":

There are some 20 million people over 50 in the work force. Pay them 1
million apiece severance for early retirement with the following
stipulations:

1) They MUST retire. Twenty million job openings - Unemployment fixed.

2) They MUST buy a new British car (or as near as damn it). Twenty million
cars ordered - car industry fixed.

3) They MUST either buy a house or pay off their mortgage - housing crisis
fixed.

It can't get any easier than that!

P.S. If more money is needed, have all members of Parliament, bankers pay
'tax exiles' their taxes.

Amusing maybe, but with 20 million thrown out of work the economy
would fall apart. You might also find it hard getting political
support for a proposal to pay them £2000 billion. Indeed you might
find it impossible to get that much money at any cost.


NT

On Sun, 5 Jun 2011 22:41:24 -0700 (PDT), harry wrote:

On Jun 6, 1:08*am, jgharston wrote:
Un-believer wrote:
1) They MUST retire. Twenty million job openings - Unemployment fixed.

Define "retire". There is no way I am going to allow somebody
to forcably stop me doing that work that *I* want to do. In fact,
I want to retire so I can get on with my work.

JGH

I have never been busier since I retired.

Being in employment is by far the best reason for refusing other work. Once
'retired' everybody thinks that you have nothing to do.
--
Peter.
The gods will stay away
whilst religions hold sway

Tabby wrote:

Amusing maybe, but with 20 million thrown out of work the economy
would fall apart. You might also find it hard getting political
support for a proposal to pay them £2000 billion. Indeed you might
find it impossible to get that much money at any cost.

Ahem. £20,000 billion (the way we currently calculate billion). Either way,
that's roughly 20 years' GDP, so yes it would be impossible to find the
money.

In article ,
"Un-believer" writes:

2) They MUST buy a new British car (or as near as damn it). Twenty million
cars ordered - car industry fixed.

For future reference, which cars are those?

Needed a new washing machine a few months back. Would happily have paid
a little extra for a UK-manufactured one (providing it wasn't crap), to
help our economy rather than our balance of trade deficit. But there are
none. Last to leave UK seems to have been Hotpoint's factory (and with
my previous Hotpoint lasting about 25 years, spares being very cheap
and easy to obtain, I would have been happy with another).

--
Andrew Gabriel
[email address is not usable -- followup in the newsgroup]

Ahem. £20,000 billion (the way we currently calculate billion).
Either way, that's roughly 20 years' GDP, so yes it would be
impossible to find the money.

But there are in fact under 9 million over-50s who are economically
active according to the most recent Labour Force Survey. So I've just
reduced the price by more than half. Doesn't that make it a sure-fire
bargain in the eyes of the average British idiot who'll just assume they
can put it on their credit cards?


--
Robin
PM may be sent to rbw0{at}hotmail{dot}com

On Jun 6, 1:05*pm, (Andrew Gabriel) wrote:
In article ,
* * * * "Un-believer" writes:



2) They MUST buy a new British car (or as near as damn it). Twenty million
cars ordered - car industry fixed.

For future reference, which cars are those?

Needed a new washing machine a few months back. Would happily have paid
a little extra for a UK-manufactured one (providing it wasn't crap), to
help our economy rather than our balance of trade deficit. But there are
none. Last to leave UK seems to have been Hotpoint's factory (and with
my previous Hotpoint lasting about 25 years, spares being very cheap
and easy to obtain, I would have been happy with another).

Where are Dysons made now, most stores seem to be giving discounts on
them
25% off at curry when trading in etc..,

Maybe a VAT of 10% on goods made in the UK might be an idea.

On 06/06/2011 14:28, whisky-dave wrote:
On Jun 6, 1:05 pm, (Andrew Gabriel) wrote:
In ,
writes:



2) They MUST buy a new British car (or as near as damn it). Twenty million
cars ordered - car industry fixed.

For future reference, which cars are those?

Needed a new washing machine a few months back. Would happily have paid
a little extra for a UK-manufactured one (providing it wasn't crap), to
help our economy rather than our balance of trade deficit. But there are
none. Last to leave UK seems to have been Hotpoint's factory (and with
my previous Hotpoint lasting about 25 years, spares being very cheap
and easy to obtain, I would have been happy with another).

Where are Dysons made now, most stores seem to be giving discounts on
them
25% off at curry when trading in etc..,

Malaysia - rather a notorious move on their part.

Andrew Gabriel wrote:
In article ,
"Un-believer" writes:
2) They MUST buy a new British car (or as near as damn it). Twenty million
cars ordered - car industry fixed.

For future reference, which cars are those?


Lotus?

Jaguar?

Needed a new washing machine a few months back. Would happily have paid
a little extra for a UK-manufactured one (providing it wasn't crap), to
help our economy rather than our balance of trade deficit. But there are
none. Last to leave UK seems to have been Hotpoint's factory (and with
my previous Hotpoint lasting about 25 years, spares being very cheap
and easy to obtain, I would have been happy with another).


You wouldn't. a new hotpoint a few yers back lasted just three years..I
have the 25 year old one still going.

The Natural Philosopher wrote:
Andrew Gabriel wrote:
In article ,
"Un-believer" writes:
2) They MUST buy a new British car (or as near as damn it). Twenty
million cars ordered - car industry fixed.

For future reference, which cars are those?


Lotus?

Jaguar?

Morgan.

TVR. (Russian owner, but last I heard the factory was till in Britain.)

Where are they making the AC Cobra nowadays?

Unless you mean *assembled* here, in which case Toyota, Honda and Nissan
spring to mind.

--
Tciao for Now!

John.

Huge wrote:
On 2011-06-06, John Williamson wrote:
The Natural Philosopher wrote:
Andrew Gabriel wrote:
In article ,
"Un-believer" writes:
2) They MUST buy a new British car (or as near as damn it). Twenty
million cars ordered - car industry fixed.
For future reference, which cars are those?

Lotus?

Jaguar?

Morgan.

TVR. (Russian owner, but last I heard the factory was till in Britain.)

There is no TVR factory any more. They went out of business several years
ago. There have been many rumours about it restarting, almost always
overseas, but IMO they are gone forever.

Shame, they were nice cars, if a tad exensive. There's a neat new logo
up on the homepage, though.

http://www.tvr.co.uk/
--
Tciao for Now!

John.

On Mon, 06 Jun 2011 15:13:04 +0100, The Natural Philosopher
wrote:

Andrew Gabriel wrote:
In article ,
"Un-believer" writes:
2) They MUST buy a new British car (or as near as damn it). Twenty million
cars ordered - car industry fixed.

For future reference, which cars are those?


Lotus?

Jaguar?

Suits me. Can I get a tax break on those two makes already in my
current fleet?


--

Huge wrote:
On 2011-06-06, John Williamson wrote:
Huge wrote:
On 2011-06-06, John Williamson wrote:
The Natural Philosopher wrote:
Andrew Gabriel wrote:
In article ,
"Un-believer" writes:
2) They MUST buy a new British car (or as near as damn it). Twenty
million cars ordered - car industry fixed.
For future reference, which cars are those?

Lotus?

Jaguar?

Morgan.

TVR. (Russian owner, but last I heard the factory was till in Britain.)
There is no TVR factory any more. They went out of business several years
ago. There have been many rumours about it restarting, almost always
overseas, but IMO they are gone forever.

Shame, they were nice cars, if a tad exensive.

For the amount of peformance, they were very inexpensive. That's likely one
of the reasons why the factory went out of business.

There's a neat new logo
up on the homepage, though.

http://www.tvr.co.uk/

That's not a "new" logo - it's the original one. )

I suppose I better own up. This is me;

http://www.pbase.com/byker28i/image/86125889


That's not fair! Discussing stuff on usenet with actual knowledge. ;-)

Assuming that *is* you inside the helmet.....

--
Tciao for Now!

John.

On Jun 5, 9:41*pm, "Un-believer" wrote:
Paraphrased from elsewhere.

There recently was an article in the daily rag The Business Section asked
readers for ideas on: "How Would You Fix the Economy?" I think this bloke
nailed it!

Dear Mr. Osbourne,

Please find below my suggestion for fixing Britain's economy. Instead of
giving billions of pounds to companies that will squander the money on
lavish parties and unearned bonuses, use the following plan.
You can call it the "Patriotic Retirement Plan":

There are some 20 million people over 50 in the work force. Pay them £1
million apiece severance for early retirement with the following
stipulations:

1) They MUST retire. Twenty million job openings - Unemployment fixed.

2) They MUST buy a new British car (or as near as damn it). Twenty million
cars ordered - car industry fixed.

3) They MUST either buy a house or pay off their mortgage - housing crisis
fixed.

It can't get any easier than that!

All for a cost of only 20 *trillion* pounds.

F**ckwit.

MBQ

On 06/06/2011 22:22, Huge wrote:
On 2011-06-06, John wrote:
Huge wrote:

I suppose I better own up. This is me;

http://www.pbase.com/byker28i/image/86125889


That's not fair! Discussing stuff on usenet with actual knowledge. ;-)

Sorry.

Assuming that *is* you inside the helmet.....

Oh, it is.


You are The Stig AICMFP.

--
Dave - The Medway Handyman www.medwayhandyman.co.uk

Huge wrote:
On 2011-06-07, The Medway Handyman wrote:
On 06/06/2011 22:22, Huge wrote:
On 2011-06-06, John wrote:
Huge wrote:
I suppose I better own up. This is me;

http://www.pbase.com/byker28i/image/86125889


That's not fair! Discussing stuff on usenet with actual knowledge. ;-)
Sorry.

Assuming that *is* you inside the helmet.....
Oh, it is.


You are The Stig AICMFP.

Wish I had his skill. And budget. And job.


Ther is hope. I saw a Jaaag cruising along an Autoroute the other day
with the registration AST 1 G, but spaced differently, so maybe there
are (is? It looks wrong either way.) more than one now.....

--
Tciao for Now!

John.

Un-believer wrote:
Bloody hell, if you still want to work *after* someone has offered you
£1000,000 then you must be a Tory banker.

No amount of money is going to stop my brain working and stop
me writing software and drawing maps. In fact, an injection of
money would *help* me get my work done.

JGH