I was kidding, as almost everyone realized. Most of the responses really
made me laugh.

Actually, I did just complete such a table, and it is giving me fits in the
finishing process. (Just like every other piece I've done!) Painting it
white did go through my mind, sort of as a punishment of the cherry for
being mean to me, instead of as an attractive finish. Upon consideration, I
realized that wood probably can't feel any pain.

Then it occurred to me to have a little fun with the white paint idea.

Regards to all,
Bruce Brooks