Every morning when I'm barely awake, well before I sit up in bed,
something seems wrong with me.

My nose is congested, or my neck hurts, or my stomach hurts.

Maybe it's the grippe, or the ague, or the chillbains, or the
chilblains, or barrel fever, or consumption, or ... the virus.

Usually goes away when I sit up, or after another minute.

Today, 4 hours later, my stomach still feels queasy.

Check my temperature with my hand. How can that possibly work?

Use a thermometer.

94 degrees.

Now I don't understand how I can even lift my arms to type.

If this is the last you hear from me, in place of flowers plase send
contributions to the National Chillbains Society.