On Dec 2, 7:44*pm, DerbyDad03 wrote:
On Dec 2, 10:49*am, BobR wrote:





On Dec 1, 9:06*pm, DerbyDad03 wrote:

On Dec 1, 7:10*pm, BobR wrote:

On Dec 1, 4:10*pm, DerbyDad03 wrote:

On Dec 1, 4:35*pm, BobR wrote:

On Dec 1, 1:13*pm, DerbyDad03 wrote:

On Dec 1, 10:50*am, BobR wrote:

On Dec 1, 3:26*am, harry wrote:

On Dec 1, 1:14*am, "HeyBub" wrote:

[Number 28 makes this post on-topic]

Texans will never say...:

31. When I retire, I'm movin' north.

30. Oh I just couldn't, she's only sixteen.

29. I'll take Shakespeare for 1000, Alex.

28. Duct tape won't fix that.

27. Come to think of it, I'll have a Heineken

26. We don't keep firearms in this house.

25. You can't feed that to the dog!

24. No kids in the back of the pickup, it's just not safe.

23. Wrestling is fake.

22. We're vegetarians.

21. Do you think my gut is too big?

20. I'll have grapefruit and grapes instead of biscuits and gravy.

19. Honey, we don't need another dog.

18. Who gives a damn who won the Civil War?

17. Give me the small bag of pork rinds.

16. Too many deer heads detract from the decor.

15. I just couldn't find a thing at Wal-Mart today.

14. Trim the fat off that steak.

13. Cappuccino tastes better than espresso.

12. The tires on that truck are too big.

11. I've got it all on the C: DRIVE.

10. Unsweetened tea tastes better.

9. My fiancé, Bobbie Jo, is registered at Tiffany's.

8. I've got two cases of Zima for the Super Bowl.

7. Checkmate

6. She's too young to be wearing a bikini.

5. Hey, here's an episode of "Dukes of Hazard" that we haven't seen.

4. I don't have a favorite college team.

3. You Guys.

2. Those shorts ought to be a little longer, Betty Mae.

AND THE NUMBER ONE THING THAT YOU WILL NEVER HEAR A SOUTHERN BOY SAY:

1. Nope, no more beer for me. I'm driving a whole busload of us down to
re-elect OBAMA!

Best post yet heybub. I take it you are fromTexas?

You might add, "I never employ illlegals to do work about the house."-

Nope, doesn't apply. *I am a Texan and I made that statement several
years back. *As a result, I have to do all of my own yard work and
work on the house since it's almost impossible to find anyone who
doesn't use illegals for those jobs.

On the other hand, I used to pay $35 a week to have my yard mowed and
trimmed. *I now do it myself, do a better job, and it only takes me 30
minutes to do it. *I don't mind making $70 an hour and the yard looks
great.- Hide quoted text -

- Show quoted text -

Even if that kind of math made sense, you're "making" $35 a week, not
$70 an hour.

But of course we all know that you aren't making one red cent

I pay myself the $35 that I would have paid to someone else for 30
minutes work. *The last time I used the calculator that came to $70
per hour of work. *I never said that was my only income just that I
was making $70 an hour for doing my yard. *What I still haven't
figured out is why the yard crew that used to do my yard took almost
45 minutes to do the job with two people.

As for not making one red cent....A penny saved is a penny earned.- Hide quoted text -

- Show quoted text -

Your total net worth just before cleaning your yard was $X.

What was your total net worth after you spent the 30 minutes cleaning
the yard?

If your net worth did not increase after cleaning your yard, you
didn't earn one red cent.

If your net worth did indeed increased by $35 after cleaning the yard,
please tell us where the money came from. There has to be a debit
someplace to offset the credit, unless you printed the money yourself

Had I paid an idiot like you to do my yard for me, then my net worth
would have been reduced by the $35.

$35 dollars saved is $35 dollars earned.

That's good...you're half way there. You realize that your net worth
is decreased when you spend money on services.

Now you just have to figure out that saving money isn't earning money
because it does not increase your net worth - unless of course you
invest it wisely, but that's a discussion for another thread.

Let me try using your financial logic...

The wife and I just walked the dogs instead of paying someone to do it
for us. I guess I just earned about $15.

Earlier, we cooked dinner instead of paying a chef. I don't
know...let's call it $75.

I drove myself to and from work instead of paying a cabby, that's got
to be at least $100.

Before I went to work, I ironed my own shirt, which I also laundered
over the weekend instead of paying someone to do it for me. Minimal
earnings, maybe $6.
ce
Note that these are all real services that people pay for. In fact,
they are all things that I have actually paid someone to do for me in
the past. By your logic, I should now be able to claim that I "earned"
$196, in one day, just by doing some every day tasks on my own instead
of paying someone to do them for me. If I do just those things
everyday, that's over $70K in "earnings" in a year.

At some point the IRS is going to come looking for me

On the other hand, had you paid all of that $70k to someone else you
would have either been $70k worse in net worth or you would have had
to earn an additional $70k to make up for all of your spending on
services that you could easily have done for yourself. *My mistake,
you would have had to earn closer to $100k to offset the spending
since the IRS would have taxed the additional earnings needed to
offset your spending.- Hide quoted text -

- Show quoted text -

You're kidding right?

How is it that you can see the logic of paying someone else to do your
chores and the impact it has on your net worth, yet you don't
understand how not spending money is not the same as earning it?

As you clearly stated, if I had to earn money to pay someone I would
have to pay taxes on those earnings, right?

Yet when I "earn" (your word) that same money by doing it myself there
is no tax implications. How is the world of checks and balances does
that make sense to you? Where did the money I "earned" by doing it
myself come from and where - physically - is it?

Please don't tell me it's in my pocket. If I had $35 in my pocket (or
bank) before I cleaned the yard, I'll still have $35 in my pocket (or
bank) when I'm done. An even stronger argument is the zero dollar
starting point: If I had $0 in my pocket (or bank) before I cleaned
the yard, I'll still have $0 in my pocket (or bank) when I'm done.
Where is this $35 that I supposedly "earned" by doing it myself?

Unless you can physically show me the $35 (or $70K) I "earned" by
doing things myself, it just doesn't exist. Don't show me the same $35
(or $70K) that I started with, that's already been accounted for. Show
me the money I *earned*, above and beyond what I already had.

Let's try it this way.

earn 1 (ûrn)

1. To gain especially for the performance of service, labor, or work:
earned money by mowing lawns.
2. To acquire or deserve as a result of effort or action: She earned a
reputation as a hard worker.
3. To yield as return or profit: a savings account that earns interest
on deposited funds.

Show me where I *gained* or *acquired* anything more than I started
with by doing it myself.- Hide quoted text -

- Show quoted text -


OK I can see you're not very smart. Try and get your brain round this
post I received lately. The final commentis wrong BTW. (It's from
someone like you)
*

Eurozone Fix

It is a slow day in a little Greek village.

The rain is beating down and the streets are deserted. Times are
tough, everybody is in debt, and everybody lives on credit.

On this particular day a rich German tourist is driving through the
village, stops at the local hotel and lays a €100 note on the desk,
telling the hotel owner he wants to inspect the rooms upstairs in
order to pick one to spend the night.

The owner gives him some keys and, as soon as the visitor has walked
upstairs, the hotelier grabs the €100 note and runs next door to pay
his debt to the butcher.

The butcher takes the €100 note and runs down the street to repay his
debt to the pig farmer.

The pig farmer takes the €100 note and heads off to pay his bill at
the supplier of feed and fuel.

The guy at the Farmers' Co-op takes the €100 note and runs to pay his
drinks bill at the taverna.

The publican slips the money along to the local prostitute drinking at
the bar, who has also been facing hard times and has had to offer him
"services" on credit.

The hooker then rushes to the hotel and pays off her room bill to the
hotel owner with the €100 note.

The hotel proprietor then places the €100 note back on the counter so
the rich traveler will not suspect anything.

At that moment the traveler comes down the stairs, picks up the €100
note, states that the rooms are not satisfactory, pockets the money,
and leaves town.

No one produced anything.
No one earned anything.

However, the whole village is now out of debt and looking to the
future with a lot more optimism.

And that, Ladies and Gentlemen, is how the bailout package works.


A joke, maybe, but isn’t it difficult to find the flaw?