"Steve B" wrote in message news:1RWbq.439455

stuff snipped

The next thing planned is to keep him on floor one
and to get a housekeeper to live on the deserted second floor. This is
a
guy who's lived alone for over 20 years. I'm guessing he will like the
idea of a roommate as much as he likes assisted living.

Recently, one of our church members came to us and asked if we had any
living accommodations to rent, or knew of any. She was in a tight spot
with
the current economy.

An awful lot of people are. Our neighborhood has a fairly large number of
"boomerang" children who have returned to the nest. Housing prices in the
DC area have been relatively safe from the horrible drop in values seen in
CA, AZ and FL. The downside is that lots of people can't afford the rents
that are charged in the area. My poor neighbor who's almost 60 had TWO of
her kids return (she raised three without a husband). She just broke her
leg tripping over a toy left on the stairs by her grandson. We were talking
outside the other day and she confided: "This was supposed to be MY time."
The kids are depressed because they go on job interview after interview and
never even get a callback.

We have an older friend named Charlie. He lives alone
in a two story house with a full basement. We introduced the two.
Charlie
needs help some times, and is on the verge of losing his driving license
or
killing someone.

Our local TV station set up a camera on the Beltway to film people in their
cars - tapping on their Blackberries, applying make-up, doing the crossword
puzzle, eating, drinking, futzing with CD players, GPS units and more. The
rarity was actually someone with hands at ten and two, paying attention.
But driving, especially for elderly people, represents freedom and they are
very reluctant to give up their cars. My mom insisted on driving until a
few months before she died, and she was legally blind in one eye! As she
got older, her trips got shorter and shorter, though and she basically
wouldn't drive on any road where the speed limit was over 30.

He's been alone for a long time. He's been wanting to
move his sister out here, as she is infirm, and he wanted to care for her,
but couldn't as he can barely take care of Charlie.

It's interesting because I think part of the problem is that my friend's
dad's got enough money to do what he wants. If he was under financial
pressure, he'd probably gravitate to a similar situation/solution. It may
be forced on him if he does not recover well. He may now have to finally
have his bad artificial hip yanked and replaced if the damage proves severe,
and that's serious bedrest time. I figure if he gets used to home-cooked
meals, laundry service and general assistance he might never want to let it
go. His daughter is fortunate in having a flexible job so she can take off
work to drive him to his endless medical appointments but that could always
change but I can tell it stresses her out and she feels she's doing way more
than the two sons who live in Southern Cal.

Cathy moved in a couple of months ago, and so far, they are doing fine.
Cathy has a fine third floor home with a fantastic view and low rent.
Charlie has a new cook that cooks all the things he likes, and is off
frozen
entrees and canned everything.

That's true symbiosis! From what I've read about seniors living alone,
they'll both enjoy longer lifespans because they're not alone. Especially
if someone has a fall or some other serious problem.

You never know how the arrangement will work out. Charlie is from
Arkansas,
and Cathy is from northern Louisiana, which is right next door. They even
knew a couple of the same people back home. They both like to play cards,
and like to watch football. She drives, and Charlie has commented on a
lot
of things he didn't see when driving the same road.

Sounds remarkably symbiotic. Sadly, one of the things that happens with old
age, at least in some people, is they become paranoid and distrustful of
strangers. I'll be sure to mention your experience to his son because they
are really bent of shape by this most recent fall. I think that the
relationship you describe would be ideal. He's got a really nice house, a
modern kitchen and an empty garage since his insurance company politely
suggested he should stop driving. There has to be someone who'd be willing
to trade housekeeping for rents that typically run $2000 for a house and
$500 for a room.

All you can do is hope for the best. It might turn out better than
expected. He's now considering moving his sister out here, as they both
would have help.

That sounds like a great solution. Sometimes, in adversity, a light shines
through. This story shows that even beyond religion, churches serve an
important social purpose.

Thanks for your input!

--
Bobby G.