Don Foreman wrote in
:

Last Saturday all I could type was a subject line that said all that
needed saying: Mary died.

The response from this group was amazing and I found it enormously
comforting. I've read the whole thread several times. Thanks!

I've been a wreck for a few days, but I'm starting to feel stronger.

snip

Mary said for years that she did not want a funeral if she went before
I. I never said anything until recently when that started to look
like a possibility. Then I said that maybe the many who love you
might need a funeral for closure, do you want to deny them that?

Mmph. Oh all right, yes I want a funeral but a simple one: a
gathering of family and close friends. Done and done. "Oh, and I no
longer want to be cremated." "OK, why?" "Because when they burned
that skin cancer off my nose that really stank and I can just imagine
how being cremated must stink." Roger that!

She'll be interred at Fort Snelling National Cemetary. An adjacent
plot will be reserved for me. Her Dad, Mom, Grandfather and
Grandmother are there too.
snip

Fumerals aren't for the deceased. They have better things to do with
their time. Funerals are for the living who have to pick up the pieces &
move on. Funerals can help the healing in in host of ways. It is a
chance for you and those who loved her to mark Mary's passing in a way
that feels best for YOU, and it sounds like you are doing just fine. If
a 21 gun salute would feel good, I say go for it.

Doug White