"Upscale" wrote in message
news

"P©WÉ®T©©LMAN ²ºº3" wrote in message
news
Canadian Tire money does not have the buying power it once had:

OTTAWA-- Foreign markets, a fluctuating European economy, and a shortage
of
barbecue equipment have all been attributed as determining factors in
the
recent drop of the Canadian Tire dollar.

Don't forget one of the biggest reasons. A few years back, the amount
given
on purchases was devalued from 5% down to the current 3%.

I dunno, but I feel incomplete without a wad of Canadian Tire money in my
wallet....I've even seen guys who reserve a separate compartment for the
darn stuff. Bud Rodkins for one:

I'm Not Sure, But I Don't Think My Canadian Tire Money Is Legal Tender

The girl at the bank wouldn't take my Canadian Tire money yesterday.

What's up with that? I've been using my Canadian Tire money for years and
years at all kinds of stores (mostly Canadian Tire stores, now that I think
of it), and nobody complained. Well, I complained a little, but only because
they come in such ridiculously low denominations, like five cents. Who needs
a five cent bill? Not me, certainly. I had to save up wads and wads of the
stuff just to buy a barbecue.

I started asking my friends, and they were equally puzzled with the bank
girl's actions. They did clear up one thing, however, and that was that
Canadian Tire money isn't given as change, it's given as a sort of bonus.
What kind of crappy bonus is that? I buy a friggen 20$ hammer and they give
me six cents "bonus"? Oohh, I'm scoring high now!

Anyway, I examined my bill, and on very close inspection, there are
differences between it and regular currency. For instance, although they
both share the same green color, regular money doesn't have a Scottish lad
all bundled up for winter printed on it. Also, most standard currency
doesn't have the Canadian Tire logo quite so prominently placed. However, as
near as I can remember, both currencies have the words "CASH BONUS"
emblazoned on them. You can see how I was confused.

There are so many similarities! Both have illegible signatures, both have
wee little printing to make photocopying difficult, and both have lots of
maple leaves in the background. Well, call me a patriot, but if maple leaves
don't a Canadian currency make, then I don't know what does.

I wrote my local MPP, who said, "We regret to inform you that John Higgens
is to busy at the time to respond to your questions or comments. He values
your input, however, and...." That's what he said. He even trailed off like
that in his letter. Man, they're not even trying anymore.

So my Canadian Tire money isn't valid, is it? I wonder if the federal
government knows of this little counter-currency operation. After a few
phone calls, it became clear that it does. Why they don't shut their
Canadian Tire asses down is beyond me. The people on the phone were unclear
on that matter.

But I'm fighting back. Every time the lady at the cash gives me Canadian
Tire money, I'm going to demand real money. That's only fair. And if the
cash lady doesn't give it to me, well, let's just say one of us is going to
walk away unhappy.

And you can do your part too! Tell all your friends that their Canadian Tire
money is fake and illegitimate! If they don't believe you, or try to get you
to shut up and go away, shout it at the top of your lungs so that everybody
can hear! I usually foam at the mouth for emphasis. That's the best part.

LOL


--
© Jon Down ®
http://www.stores.ebay.com/jdpowertoolcanada