"John" gurgled happily, sounding much like they
were saying:

It always seems to me that fire fighting is less successful than it used
to be. Any thoughts on this? Perhaps the water isn't as good - or don't
the hoses get pointed in the right places.

Grade I listed building.
Being developed into flats.
At a time of falling property values.
At a time of slow property sales.

Fire breaks out, at a time when conveniently nobody's working to be
risked.

Mmm. Bet that was an accident, eh?