Jim Thompson wrote:

My cleaning lady (Hispanic, but legal) called me Friday in such
hysterics I could barely understand her broken English, that she
wouldn't be there to clean my house....

http://www.eastvalleytribune.com/story/97925

1. The butler did it.

2. Murder-suicide and then the dog got into the leftover Kool-Aide.

3. As long as your cleaning lady knows that mixing bleach and ammonia
doesn't make a super cleaner, you'll be OK.

--
Paul Hovnanian
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The only tools one needs in life:
WD-40 to make things go and duct tape to make them stop.