"The Medway Handyman" wrote in message
.uk...
"The Medway Handyman" wrote in
message . uk...
Hi All

I write a regular 'Handyman Hints' column for a local magazine. They
want the December one to have an Xmas theme.

I thought of doing a spoof article e.g. make sure the chimney is
swept so Santa can get down OK, leave parking space for sleigh etc.

Any ideas on this theme?

Have you asked the editor if that is what is wanted? If I were the
editor I would be hoping for something along the lines of how to fix
a Christmas tree securely, how to get the tree lights working, how
safely to put up decorations, etc.

Yes. She loved it.

I'm glad to hear that. When I used to edit a local magazine, far too many
contributors sent in spoof articles without checking whether they were
wanted. Had I published them all, in some months there would have been
little real content.

How about instructions for making the perfect snowball or a snowman? Given
your presumed location, it is not likely anyone will get a chance to test
the instructions.

Colin Bignell