I'm learning how to fix my own house. So far it's cost me a fortune to
correct all my mistakes, and things I wrecked. but I got to learn
somehow. I decided that my mistakes are mainly caused by the lack of
proper tools, so I got me a tool catalog and am placing a huge order.
There's a problem though. I was looking at all the hammers, and wanted
to get one of each until I saw the one called a BALL PEEN hammer. I
think we all know that they are not allowed to use the word PENIS in a
tool catalog, and it's really a BALL PENIS hammer. Damnit.... that
sounds like torture. Why would anyone buy one of those? I suppose
they just sell them to women who hate their husbands. I am NOT
ordering that hammer.

The HomeWrecker