"Toller" wrote in message
...

My son drove my car into a ditch. The tow truck operator winched it out,
but slightly damaged a panel. He pointed it out and said it was
unavoidable. It isn't much, but any sheet metal damage is expensive to
fix.

The car was a 2001 Golf in perfect condition.

No such thing.
Perfect condition went out the window when you left the lot....

Besides, it might have been perfect in your eyes, but when it hit the
ditch..all bets went off.


There was no damage from going in the ditch.


Sure there was..perhaps not cosmetic..


The damage was a slightly bent panel behind the driver's front wheel, and
damage to the paint there. My insurance would go up way too much to file
a claim on it.


Then pay for the new fender out of pocket...or better yet...see below.


There is a responsible witness to the operators pointing out the damage he
had done.

Hope they were not the passenger in the car with your son.


Legally, the liability is clear; that is not the issue.

Umm...sure is. Id be looking at your son and askin where your money was.


Several people have implied that I am a lousy father for letting my son
avoid his responsibilty; but that is largely the issue. If the tow truck
operator is responsible, then my son is not (and visa-versa). I want to
hold the right party responsibilty. Eventhough I could recover from the
tow truck company, I don't want to do it if it is wrong.


Then you need to be looking at your son....he put the car in the ditch, he
was in control, its his responsibility when he took the keys from you.
If it had not been placed in a ditch, you would not have this issue to deal
with.
If you were serious about this, you would stop trying to find the "out" to
go blame the towing company, and look at it logically...and responsibly.
Your son, for whatever reason, failed to control the vehicle. The vehicle
went into a ditch. In order to extract vehicle from ditch, it was damaged.
You were not there, so...remember, there are three sides to any
story...Yours, theirs and the truth.
Looking from the outside, I would suggest that you make your son pay for the
fender, AND the driving classes he should be in.
You then teach your son, responsibility for his actions, in this case,
failing to keep it on the road, and you teach him how to drive and stay
between those white lines.

Sorry...Im sure you dont like the sound of that, but its what I would do. My
son in law cant drive worth a damn. Hes not my son, but when he wrecked his
last car, he asked me to buy him another one. I can afford it, and he knew
it. I would have, but the boy was handed everything to him from his father
in CA. I offered a loan to him to get a new one, or a good used one, and of
course, that wasnt good enough. Tough. After walking for a few weeks, he
finally got the hint, and started to save for one. My job isnt to bail him
out when he screws up...yours as a parent IMO isnt to teach your son how to
screw up and get away with it. Too many kids out there now like
that....Oh..dont worry, Daddy will fix it, or, the one I like....You dont
know who my Daddy is...who really gives a damn kid? Suck it up, and deal
with it. If you cant afford a slight increase in your insurance for a couple
of years, perhaps the car should just get sold off and he walk.
Wait....hes not paying the additional insurance for him being allowed to
drive your vehicle? Has he NO responsibility? What does he do all day? sit
around, play Xbox, smoke dope behind your back and steal from your liquer
cabinet?

He might be a good kid...you came into Usenet asking for free advice and you
got it. Seems the majority would suck it up and teach him something about
responsibility.