Gunner Asch wrote:
On Sun, 13 Nov 2005 08:16:03 -0500, "Proctologically Violated©®"
wrote:


Bless you.

Hey Gunner, help me out he
I'm at Life's Crossroad he
I gotta choose between becoming a Right Wing Survivalist and a Liberal.
I'm leaning toward RWS, cuz, well, I gits to build a concrete unnerground
bunker, and also cuz, well, I cain't quite unnerstand the fukn NYTimes, and
sittin around in $tar$uck$ w/ sed Times and sundry semiliterati
latte-drinking assholes makes me sorta nauseous (liberals'n'****)..

But I think the lynch-pin g here will be:
Which group has more cats??
----------------------------


Actually..on the Liberal side..it appears that bitter, homely, aging
lesbians have more cats.

On the Conservative side..its strong, self sufficent, confident and
competent folks who have cats. Which of course includes most
survivalists of any degree of conservativism. After all..what could
be better to have as a friend and partner..but someone similar to
yourself?

Libs and the insecure (yes..generally mean the same thing) tend to go
in for dogs..as they need fawning syncophants to bolster their egos.
Which is why we have a Liberal designed welfare state..and for the
same reasons. Dogs and welfare recipents beg for handouts.

Cats demand their due.

Cats demand what they are NOT due. My cat use to work for a living -
he'd catch mice, frogs, snakes and stuff and eat them. Now, he's retired
at 14 years old. When he wants food, the sadistic ******* comes up and
sinks his claws into me. :-) Not just any food, either, he wants the
fancy feast in the little cans.

Now, dogs, they know that they have to work for a living. Roll over,
beg, dance, speak, shake hands, ... they have to do tricks for every
little bit. There is no retirement. Sure, a dog that is not expected to
work will do no work. Dogs do what you expect them to do, if they know
what that is. "Work like a dog" is an expression that comes from the
fact that dogs can be very hard workers. Cattle dogs, sheep dogs, guard
dogs, police dogs, drug sniffing dogs.... Ever hear of "cattle cat"? No,
cat's don't work. Keep in mind, though, YOU'RE THE BOSS. If you're going
to run this operation, you have to train your employee, your dog. If you
want him to bring your slippers, you have to train him how to do that.
Don't think that a dog is going to open up his own services shop and
start to do things for you if you don't show him how.

Cats aren't loyal. Dogs are, even to a misurable owner. True, it is
possible to break a dogs innate loyalty, but it's difficult, you'd have
to be a really undeserving of loyalty. People who like loyalty like
dogs. People who don't care for it, or even hold loyalty in contempt,
favor cats.

Dogs are obediant, and know who's boss. Try to get a cat to come when
you call. Maybe he will, maybe he won't. Let's face it, if the cat comes
to you it isn't because you called, but because you're his tuna can
opener. Leaders like dogs, dogs follow.

I am reminded of a story told about a fireman who was sometimes called
on to go to homes where a person had died for several days. He said that
invariably, the deceased dog would be lying right next to his dead
master, waiting for them to get up. Cats, on the other hand would start
to eat them.