I thought some of you guys would enjoy this. It all happened in the
last two hours.


My PM 719 mortiser arrived today.

8 inches of snow arrived yesterday (shut up, Houston and Daytona
residents! G), making the walk-out feature of my basement not so
useful.

The pallet had two boxes, a 55 pounder, and a 271 pounder.

The 55'er went right down the stairs in my arms. I unpacked the 271
pounder in the garage to find... AN ASSEMBLED MACHINE! Normally
good, not so much right now. So, I think it through while I eat some
pizza and study the manual.

I unpack the machine and convince myself that I can get it down the
stairs on my hand truck if I securely strap it to the truck. After
all, my hand truck has pneumatic tires and stair skids, I'm 6' / 245
pounds and exercise almost every day, and tool manufacturers almost
always overstate weight these days! I'll just go one step at a time.

Using Yoga style leverage gyrations to get the machine out of the
packaging, I web strap it to the truck. It's nice and secure. "No
problem, I can do this", I tell myself.

I wheel it over to the stairs and drop it to the first step. The
hand truck handle, with it's 4 1/2' mechanical leverage, almost throws
me down the stairs as the machine wants to tumble forward! G

As fast as I possibly can, I drop to the floor, but the handle is
pulling me down the stairs! I catch a knee on the door jamb and,
WHEW! The motion stops. Even though the thing is trying it's
darndest to pull me down, I get the ball of one foot on each door
jamb. As I sit on the hall floor, spread legged across the doorway,
it's taking quite a bit of strength just to keep it here... No way I
can even remove one hand!

Did I mention I'm home alone?

Somehow, I manage to toss all my weight backward, against the hall
wall, while at the same time pushing the handle down, enabling the
stair skid to slide back into the hall.

I did get the thing downstairs by disassembling to three parts, and
then strapping up the hand truck. I think I'll just enjoy some nice
Harpoon IPA and wait to assemble it until tomorrow.

Damage is limited to 1/2" groves in the oak floor lip at the top of
the stairs, but it can't be seen with the door shut. I also might
need to steel wool the floor a tad, and wipe a little more Gymseal on.
I put the floor in and finished it, so I can fix it!

My chestnuts and muscles have mostly returned to their rightful
places. G

Most importantly, the tool is unscathed!



---------------------------------------------
** http://www.bburke.com/woodworking.html **
---------------------------------------------

"B A R R Y" wrote in message
...
I thought some of you guys would enjoy this. It all happened in the
last two hours.


My PM 719 mortiser arrived today.

8 inches of snow arrived yesterday (shut up, Houston and Daytona
residents! G), making the walk-out feature of my basement not so
useful.

The pallet had two boxes, a 55 pounder, and a 271 pounder.

The 55'er went right down the stairs in my arms. I unpacked the 271
pounder in the garage to find... AN ASSEMBLED MACHINE! Normally
good, not so much right now. So, I think it through while I eat some
pizza and study the manual.

I unpack the machine and convince myself that I can get it down the
stairs on my hand truck if I securely strap it to the truck. After
all, my hand truck has pneumatic tires and stair skids, I'm 6' / 245
pounds and exercise almost every day, and tool manufacturers almost
always overstate weight these days! I'll just go one step at a time.

Using Yoga style leverage gyrations to get the machine out of the
packaging, I web strap it to the truck. It's nice and secure. "No
problem, I can do this", I tell myself.

I wheel it over to the stairs and drop it to the first step. The
hand truck handle, with it's 4 1/2' mechanical leverage, almost throws
me down the stairs as the machine wants to tumble forward! G

As fast as I possibly can, I drop to the floor, but the handle is
pulling me down the stairs! I catch a knee on the door jamb and,
WHEW! The motion stops. Even though the thing is trying it's
darndest to pull me down, I get the ball of one foot on each door
jamb. As I sit on the hall floor, spread legged across the doorway,
it's taking quite a bit of strength just to keep it here... No way I
can even remove one hand!

Did I mention I'm home alone?

Somehow, I manage to toss all my weight backward, against the hall
wall, while at the same time pushing the handle down, enabling the
stair skid to slide back into the hall.

I did get the thing downstairs by disassembling to three parts, and
then strapping up the hand truck. I think I'll just enjoy some nice
Harpoon IPA and wait to assemble it until tomorrow.

Damage is limited to 1/2" groves in the oak floor lip at the top of
the stairs, but it can't be seen with the door shut. I also might
need to steel wool the floor a tad, and wipe a little more Gymseal on.
I put the floor in and finished it, so I can fix it!

My chestnuts and muscles have mostly returned to their rightful
places. G

Most importantly, the tool is unscathed!



---------------------------------------------
** http://www.bburke.com/woodworking.html **
---------------------------------------------

That's only really funny because you and the machine both turned out fine.

But it *is* damn funny.

Joe

On Sat, 15 Dec 2007 00:31:22 GMT, B A R R Y
wrote:

I thought some of you guys would enjoy this. It all happened in the
last two hours.


My PM 719 mortiser arrived today.

8 inches of snow arrived yesterday (shut up, Houston and Daytona
residents! G), making the walk-out feature of my basement not so
useful.

The pallet had two boxes, a 55 pounder, and a 271 pounder.

The 55'er went right down the stairs in my arms. I unpacked the 271
pounder in the garage to find... AN ASSEMBLED MACHINE! Normally
good, not so much right now. So, I think it through while I eat some
pizza and study the manual.

I unpack the machine and convince myself that I can get it down the
stairs on my hand truck if I securely strap it to the truck. After
all, my hand truck has pneumatic tires and stair skids, I'm 6' / 245
pounds and exercise almost every day, and tool manufacturers almost
always overstate weight these days! I'll just go one step at a time.

Using Yoga style leverage gyrations to get the machine out of the
packaging, I web strap it to the truck. It's nice and secure. "No
problem, I can do this", I tell myself.

I wheel it over to the stairs and drop it to the first step. The
hand truck handle, with it's 4 1/2' mechanical leverage, almost throws
me down the stairs as the machine wants to tumble forward! G

As fast as I possibly can, I drop to the floor, but the handle is
pulling me down the stairs! I catch a knee on the door jamb and,
WHEW! The motion stops. Even though the thing is trying it's
darndest to pull me down, I get the ball of one foot on each door
jamb. As I sit on the hall floor, spread legged across the doorway,
it's taking quite a bit of strength just to keep it here... No way I
can even remove one hand!

Did I mention I'm home alone?

Somehow, I manage to toss all my weight backward, against the hall
wall, while at the same time pushing the handle down, enabling the
stair skid to slide back into the hall.

I did get the thing downstairs by disassembling to three parts, and
then strapping up the hand truck. I think I'll just enjoy some nice
Harpoon IPA and wait to assemble it until tomorrow.

Damage is limited to 1/2" groves in the oak floor lip at the top of
the stairs, but it can't be seen with the door shut. I also might
need to steel wool the floor a tad, and wipe a little more Gymseal on.
I put the floor in and finished it, so I can fix it!

My chestnuts and muscles have mostly returned to their rightful
places. G

Most importantly, the tool is unscathed!



---------------------------------------------
** http://www.bburke.com/woodworking.html **
---------------------------------------------


ROFLMAO!!!! at least ya made it in one piece! enjoy the new tool.

skeez

B A R R Y said:

I thought some of you guys would enjoy this. It all happened in the
last two hours.


My PM 719 mortiser arrived today.

Aside from being a not so thinly veiled drive by, (you suck, BTW),
that was a funny situation (in retrospect) I've found myself in a time
or two before.

Try unloading a Unisaw from the back of a pickup by yourself;
discovering just a bit too late to prevent oneself from being
semi-trapped under both it and a hand truck, just how top-heavy the
sucker was packaged.

Or moving an early 80's oak cabinet Zenith big-screen down a winding
staircase at a local politicians house, and finding out halfway down
that the length of the set exceeds the available (decreasing) radius.

Once your gonads have returned to their respective, proper locations,
enjoy the new tool.


Greg G.

Greg G. wrote:
B A R R Y said:

I thought some of you guys would enjoy this. It all happened in
the
last two hours.


My PM 719 mortiser arrived today.

Aside from being a not so thinly veiled drive by, (you suck, BTW),
that was a funny situation (in retrospect) I've found myself in a
time
or two before.

Try unloading a Unisaw from the back of a pickup by yourself;
discovering just a bit too late to prevent oneself from being
semi-trapped under both it and a hand truck, just how top-heavy the
sucker was packaged.

Or moving an early 80's oak cabinet Zenith big-screen down a winding
staircase at a local politicians house, and finding out halfway down
that the length of the set exceeds the available (decreasing)
radius.

Once your gonads have returned to their respective, proper
locations,
enjoy the new tool.

My favorite was being chased down three flights of stairs by a line
printer. For you young guys, a "line printer" is not one of those
little things that you strap onto the back of your motorcycle and take
home from CrapUSA, it is a rather large piece of machinery that is
ideally moved with a fork lift. I'm very happy that I didn't have to
move the Xerox photocopiers out--one of them wouldn't fit in a pickup
truck.

And for future reference, when moving something large and heavy down
stairs, skid it down on a line. (lay planks on the stairs so that it
slides freely) If you've got a solidly mounted piece of 2" or larger
pipe (mounted so it can't turn that is) three turns of rope around it
will control surprisingly large loads. If that's not an option a
Figure 8 Descender tied to a piece of 2x4 can be quite handy.

I generally just tie a tow strap around it and hook it to the tow hook
on the Jeep, with just enough slack to get the load started down.
Then I back the Jeep up slowly. That only works if there's a straight
shot to the stairs from outside though.

All kinds of ways to move a load down stairs--the important thing to
remember is to find a way to let gravity and friction do the work and
be positioned so that if it lets go you aren't what stops it.



--
--
--John
to email, dial "usenet" and validate
(was jclarke at eye bee em dot net)

"B A R R Y" wrote in message
...
I thought some of you guys would enjoy this. It all happened in the
last two hours.

I wheel it over to the stairs and drop it to the first step. The
hand truck handle, with it's 4 1/2' mechanical leverage, almost throws
me down the stairs as the machine wants to tumble forward! G

As fast as I possibly can, I drop to the floor, but the handle is
pulling me down the stairs! I catch a knee on the door jamb and,
WHEW! The motion stops. Even though the thing is trying it's
darndest to pull me down, I get the ball of one foot on each door
jamb. As I sit on the hall floor, spread legged across the doorway,
it's taking quite a bit of strength just to keep it here... No way I
can even remove one hand!

Did I mention I'm home alone?

I'm having a difficult time visualizing this. How about you re-enact this
and make a video so we can see what actually took place?
Glad your gonads still work.
--
Ed
http://pages.cthome.net/edhome/

On Dec 14, 9:46 pm, "Edwin Pawlowski" wrote:

I'm having a difficult time visualizing this. How about you re-enact this and make a video so we can see what actually took place?
Glad your gonads still work.

No kiddin'. I laughed like hell just reading it.... but a video....
now you really got something!

Great story there, Barry.

Robert

(still snickering)

"J. Clarke" wrote in
:

Greg G. wrote:
B A R R Y said:

I thought some of you guys would enjoy this. It all happened in
the
last two hours.


My PM 719 mortiser arrived today.

Aside from being a not so thinly veiled drive by, (you suck, BTW),
that was a funny situation (in retrospect) I've found myself in a
time
or two before.

Try unloading a Unisaw from the back of a pickup by yourself;
discovering just a bit too late to prevent oneself from being
semi-trapped under both it and a hand truck, just how top-heavy the
sucker was packaged.

Or moving an early 80's oak cabinet Zenith big-screen down a winding
staircase at a local politicians house, and finding out halfway down
that the length of the set exceeds the available (decreasing)
radius.

Once your gonads have returned to their respective, proper
locations,
enjoy the new tool.

*snip*


And for future reference, when moving something large and heavy down
stairs, skid it down on a line. (lay planks on the stairs so that it
slides freely) If you've got a solidly mounted piece of 2" or larger
pipe (mounted so it can't turn that is) three turns of rope around it
will control surprisingly large loads. If that's not an option a
Figure 8 Descender tied to a piece of 2x4 can be quite handy.


*snip*

All kinds of ways to move a load down stairs--the important thing to
remember is to find a way to let gravity and friction do the work and
be positioned so that if it lets go you aren't what stops it.




We moved a pool table by sliding it on 2x4s. This wasn't downhill, but
on flat surfaces. When we got to the stairs, the table just naturally
slid easily. So, when moving heavy things don't be afraid to get the
2x4s out!

Find something bigger for a ramp, though... You'll get 90% of the way up
and the wheels will come off! DAMHIKT, but it did make the story that
little bit funnier. ;-)

Puckdropper
--
Wise is the man who attempts to answer his question before asking it.

To email me directly, send a message to puckdropper (at) fastmail.fm

On Fri, 14 Dec 2007 22:46:25 -0500, "Edwin Pawlowski"
wrote:

I'm having a difficult time visualizing this. How about you re-enact this
and make a video so we can see what actually took place?

Sure!

I'll film and direct, you can have the lead role.

We can hire Lee Gordon to professionally narrate the action and create
a music bed.

"J. Clarke" wrote in message
...


My favorite was being chased down three flights of stairs by a line
printer. For you young guys, a "line printer" is not one of those
little things that you strap onto the back of your motorcycle and take
home from CrapUSA, it is a rather large piece of machinery that is
ideally moved with a fork lift.

I have only one thing to say to this... Hammer Flight Time Adjustments.


--

-Mike-


Of course that has nothing to do with the post - I just wanted to show that
I really do know about line printers.

On Dec 14, 7:31 pm, B A R R Y wrote:
I thought some of you guys would enjoy this. It all happened in the
last two hours.

(Sorry to snip the really good stuff for space)

My chestnuts and muscles have mostly returned to their rightful
places. G

Most importantly, the tool is unscathed!

---------------------------------------------
**http://www.bburke.com/woodworking.html **
---------------------------------------------

Son, didn't anybody tell you. . . "You got to be smarter then the
machine"

Great Story! Glad you survived. Sounds like my Piano story.

Roy

OK, I've read this response a couple of times now:

"If you've got a solidly mounted piece of 2" or larger pipe (mounted
so it can't turn that is) three turns of rope around it will control
surprisingly large loads. If that's not an option a Figure 8
Descender tied to a piece of 2x4 can be quite handy."

I can't imagine how he's mounting the two-inch pipe, ca't visualize
the "surprisingly large loads" or the movement.

And, what is a "Figure 8 Descender?"

In article , Hoosierpopi wrote:

OK, I've read this response a couple of times now:

"If you've got a solidly mounted piece of 2" or larger pipe (mounted
so it can't turn that is) three turns of rope around it will control
surprisingly large loads. If that's not an option a Figure 8
Descender tied to a piece of 2x4 can be quite handy."

I can't imagine how he's mounting the two-inch pipe, ca't visualize
the "surprisingly large loads" or the movement.

Wrapping the rope several times around the pipe increases the friction of the
rope with the pipe, allowing you to pay out rope slowly as the load slides
down a ramp.

And, what is a "Figure 8 Descender?"

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Climbing_equipment

A movable pulley on an inclined plane works wonders, too. I moved a 400-pound
table saw into the basement by laying it down on a shop-built dolly with a
pulley at one end, riding on a plywood ramp nailed to the stairs. The rope
passing through the pulley was secured at one end by tying it off to a 4x4
braced across the opposite side of a doorway, with my son (age 14 at the time)
holding the other end. I walked beside it down the ramp to guide it, as my son
payed out the rope. The pitch of the stairs is about 3:5, so 60% of the weight
of the saw was loaded on the stairs, and 40% on the rope -- half on the fixed
end, and half on the free end. My son only had to hold back 80 pounds.

--
Regards,
Doug Miller (alphageek at milmac dot com)

It's time to throw all their damned tea in the harbor again.

"Bonehenge (B A R R Y)" wrote in message
I'm having a difficult time visualizing this. How about you re-enact
this
and make a video so we can see what actually took place?

Sure!

I'll film and direct, you can have the lead role.

I've got full length feature you can film. It's 1994 and I've just moved my
6' long, 5' high, 21" deep entertainment centre (approximately 5 sheets of
heavy veneered plywood worth of material) into my apartment. It's on a set
of 10 casters so I'd be able to move it around when necessary from my
wheelchair. However, the unit isn't stained, I figured I'd do it in my
apartment.

Anyway, I've gotten in behind the entertainment centre and managed to tip it
backwards with it leaning on two saw horses, one on each end with me in the
middle. This is the only way I can readily reach the top of the unit so I
can stain and finish it. I'm busy rubbing stain into it and I push too hard.
Both of the saw horses slip out and the unit starts tipping further
backwards, pushing me in my wheelchair with it. I can see my live flashing
before my eyes as I get crushed underneath the thing. I end up with the back
of my wheelchair pinned against the apartment wall and the entertainment
centre towering over me and leaning on the armrests of my wheelchair. The
damned unit is too heavy for me to stand upright, so I'm stuck. No more
flashes of being crushed to death, now I'm imagining dying of thirst
instead, stuck in this position. I'm sitting there about 20 minutes
wondering what I should do. My first idea was to start banging on the
apartment wall hoping to attract someone's attention, but then I'm thinking
I'd die of embarrassment when I had to be rescued from this position. I can
still remember thinking, "Hell, I'd rather die of thirst instead" because I
know my neighbours and friends would never let me hear the end of it.

I guess that was all the impetus I needed. Out of sheer desperation, I was
able to summon the strength
to stand the unit fully upright and escape my impromptu prison. I finished
staining and finished the entertainment centre a week later with a friend on
hand who sat there drinking beer and smirking all the time while I was doing
it.

On Sat, 15 Dec 2007 06:05:19 -0800 (PST), ROYNEU
wrote:

Sounds like my Piano story.

Care to share? G

B A R R Y wrote in
:

snip

My PM 719 mortiser arrived today.

snip
The pallet had two boxes, a 55 pounder, and a 271 pounder.

The 55'er went right down the stairs in my arms....

snip


Barry

I also availed myself of the Rocler/Jet free shipping and discounts, but
for something less formidable; the Jet Air Filtration System. So
yesterday as I'm walking out the door at noon I find out from the freight
company that they are scheduling delivery. No problem, "Monday will be
fine...."What do you mean it's already on the truck and will be there
shortly!" Well I was set to take 91 yo MIL to medical specialist that we
had waited a month for an appointment. So with no one home they could
just leave it ... oh it's on a semi and at the street is not an answer,
but by the garage is OK. Well while at MD's office I get a cell phone
call from the driver, for directions to my house over roads he can take
the semi and learn it is palletized at 120 lbs which he has to hump up a
100 foot winding icy driveway. Well, I get home last night and there
blocking my garage is the Jet carton.

It stayed there last night on the ice and after reading your post this AM
decided to move immediately to "Plan B" instead of trying to hump this
thing in on the ice. Out came the tractor with frontend loader and it was
delivered in the bucket to the front door and slid in on the tile floor.
I unpacked it there and have convinced the wife that it should stay
upstairs "purifying the air" for a while until I have help getting it
downstairs to the shop. Unpacked it's only 85 pounds so it's no big deal
getting it down other than the bulky size.

Jerry

PS When are you and Lee Gordon going to fly down?

--
Posted via a free Usenet account from http://www.teranews.com

"Bonehenge (B A R R Y)" wrote in
:

Now THAT'S a drive-by! Front-end loader? G

snip

Actually, the AFS-1000 isn't bad. It's easy to hold if you remove the
filters. I was able to hang mine alone
snip

AFS-1500 and it's downstairs chugging away on the bench already so it's
safe to come, although I could always use help hanging it or with the 15"
planer (another driveby ).

I'll be in touch after the holidays, I need some bicycling
advice/assistance.

Have a Merry Christmas and hope we get a clear flyable weekend soon.

Jerry




--
Posted via a free Usenet account from http://www.teranews.com

On 15 Dec 2007 17:13:23 GMT, A Lurker wrote:

Out came the tractor with frontend loader and it was
delivered in the bucket to the front door

Now THAT'S a drive-by! Front-end loader? G

I could have carried the mortiser right down to the back door. 8" of
snow be damned!

I have lucked out in the sense that anything big I've ordered by mail
has always been delivered in a lift-gate equipped straight truck.


PS When are you and Lee Gordon going to fly down?

After you get the box down the stairs. G

Actually, the AFS-1000 isn't bad. It's easy to hold if you remove the
filters. I was able to hang mine alone

We should do that soon. Lee and I were going to take a shot a
Grizzly, too. I found out there's a $2 regional transit district bus
that runs from Williamsport airport, actually stopping right at Grizz!
The weekend weather (except today) has been pretty crappy (or screwily
forecast), every time I could actually go. Even though I'm instrument
rated, the plane isn't icing capable, so passing through a cloud deck
is much less of an option in cold weather.

I'll have to watch close and call Lee if we see a chance. The plane
goes in for annual the last week of January. It would be nice to hit
NJ before that. Today actually would have been nice.

On 15 Dec 2007 19:19:21 GMT, A Lurker wrote:

AFS-1500 and it's downstairs chugging away on the bench already so it's
safe to come, although I could always use help hanging it or with the 15"
planer (another driveby ).

You want to hang the planer from the ceiling? G

We'll get there soon...

"Mike Marlow" wrote in news:260af$4763d5e0
:


"J. Clarke" wrote in message
...


My favorite was being chased down three flights of stairs by a line
printer. For you young guys, a "line printer" is not one of those
little things that you strap onto the back of your motorcycle and take
home from CrapUSA, it is a rather large piece of machinery that is
ideally moved with a fork lift.

I have only one thing to say to this... Hammer Flight Time Adjustments.



1403 Nancy1?

Sure!

I'll film and direct, you can have the lead role.

We can hire Lee Gordon to professionally narrate the action and create
a music bed.

You rang? I guess seeing my name introduced into this discussion gives me
an excuse to post this. It is a piece I wrote for the first issue of
Woodcraft Magazine, just over three years ago. It chronicles a very similar
experience to the one that was the genesis of this thread.

Barry, you may recognize one of the characters in the story. I think it's
called irony. Or, in this case, cast irony.

"Like most red-blooded American men, I have, from time to time, come down
with a case of one of the world's most curable afflictions: tool envy. I
have reasoned that "if only I had one of those bad boys in my workshop, I
could really crank out some nice stuff." And yes, I am suffering from tool
envy at this very moment. But what makes this case so frustrating is that I
already own the equipment I have been lusting after. My new jointer -- two
hundred eight five pounds of cast iron magnificence -- sits tantalizingly
close to my shop, tormenting me every time I walk past it.


We men not only dream about the great things we can craft with our tools, we
take pride in the machinery itself. We like to brag to our buddies about
what a great deal we got on some tools. (You won't believe the deal I got
on that jointer.) And we can be equally boastful about how much we paid for
others. Why, in my shop I have a piece of equipment that set me back around
thirty grand! Okay, you got me. It's my car; my shop is also my garage.
The point is a man knows there's nothing that makes a more telling statement
about who he is than his power tools, except maybe his audio/video
equipment.



The nice young man who gave me the great deal on my new jointer was also
kind enough to help me hoist it onto the back of my van and it wasn't until
I got all the way home, carefully backed the vehicle up the driveway, swung
open the cargo door and grabbed hold of my gorgeous new hunk of machinery
that I came to the literally painful realization that it was he who had done
the bulk of the hoisting while I was the one who had done the helping.



Here's the thing about being a middle-aged guy. Most of your friends are
other middle-aged guys. One of them is currently undergoing physical
therapy for a shoulder injury suffered during a potato sack race at his
company outing, so he's no help. Another one is actually able-bodied and,
better yet, he "owes me one" because I helped him haul his jointer from the
car to the basement back when he scratched his own tool envy itch. True,
his was in three manageable pieces, not fully assembled like mine. And we
were both a couple of years younger back then. But it's a moot point anyway
because he just moved five states away so it would take a round-trip
airplane ticket to enlist his help now.



Finally, I did manage to persuade one of my pals to stop over after our
weekly round of golf. Oh sure, you can call him "Tiger" when he's
out-driving me by thirty yards on every hole. And at age 52, he's
practically what I would call a young whippersnapper, if I used words like
"whippersnapper." But one fistful of the mighty iron infeed table on my
sawdust-making behemoth turned him into Mr. Pussycat. He ran off as if his
manhood had just been challenged, which, come to think of it, I guess it
had.



Meanwhile, I pine for my bought-and-paid-for yet inaccessible woodworking
tool. And pine is the operative word. I have accumulated plans galore
requiring genuine, slabbed-from-a-tree lumber just waiting for my new
surfacing equipment but I figured I'd first build a few things with medium
density fiberboard because it comes from the lumberyard already flat and
straight as an arrow. That's the upside. The downside is that MDF is way
heavier than real wood. Still, it was ideal for constructing something
simple and rectangular, like a pedestal for my wide screen television.
Oops, there I go bragging about my cool man stuff again.



So there you have my frustration in a nutshell. I have a backlog of
woodworking projects I'm just itching to get started on but not before I get
to channel Tim Allen, grunt "More power!" and plug in my prized machine
currently imprisoned mere steps from my workshop. And I can't do that until
I can corral a couple suckers - er, I mean buddies - to help me horse it off
the truck. I guess all I can do in the meantime is plant myself in my
recliner, grab a beverage and the remote, and settle down in front of the
big screen. But, you know, the viewing angle isn't quite right and,
between the TV set and my homemade base, that's an awful lot of weight to
lug around. Do you know anybody who can come over and help me move it? "


--
To e-mail, replace "bucketofspam" with "dleegordon"

_________________________________
Lee Gordon
http://www.leegordonproductions.com

"Lee Gordon" wrote in message
Do you know anybody who can come over and help me move it? "

It's called Beer, Lee. And if you're smart, it's the promise of beer
afterwards, not during.

On Sun, 16 Dec 2007 00:52:55 -0500, "Lee Gordon"
wrote:


Meanwhile, I pine for my bought-and-paid-for yet inaccessible woodworking
tool.

That's awesome. G

Your van was big enough where you should have bolted the jointer to
the floor and run an a/c cord out to the van!

On Dec 14, 8:01 pm, "J. Clarke" wrote:

My favorite was being chased down three flights of stairs by a line
printer. For you young guys, a "line printer" is not one of those
little things that you strap onto the back of your motorcycle and take
home from CrapUSA, it is a rather large piece of machinery that is
ideally moved with a fork lift. I'm very happy that I didn't have to
move the Xerox photocopiers out--one of them wouldn't fit in a pickup
truck.

I went to a county surplus auction once where an item listed on the
prospectus was a photocopier- a single item lot at an auction where a
typical lot was at least one pallet load of stuff- some of the lots
were a dozen pallets of stuff.

the auctioneer got around to the photocopier and started the bid at I
think $100. no bids, so he started dropping the price. he got down to
$20 and was ready to give up and move on when a voice piped up "five
dollars". the auctioneer hollered out "sold!" and the auction went on.

at the end of the bidding was the part where the guy with the forklift
brings out the stuff for you. the look on the womans face when he
brought out a machine the size of a large refrigerator on it's side
was priceless.

And if your Suckers errr buddies won't do it for cold beer
a. look for new buddies
b.enlist the help of your teenage daughter/granddaughter or niece and
get the neighborhood teenage boys to move it for you. Teenage boys will go
to great lengths to impress teenage girls with their strength.

--
Mike
Watch for the bounce.
If ya didn't see it, ya didn't feel it.
If ya see it, it didn't go off.
Old Air Force Munitions Saying
IYAAYAS
"Upscale" wrote in message
...

"Lee Gordon" wrote in message
Do you know anybody who can come over and help me move it? "

It's called Beer, Lee. And if you're smart, it's the promise of beer
afterwards, not during.