I'm in a pickle of my own making (lesson learned, think everything
through before you start....) but was hoping for possibly some advice
to help me out.

I have a 2m35 wardrobe with sliding doors in a childs bedroom. Given
their propensity to climb in or on anything, I'd like to make sure it
is secured to the wall. Its an Ikea wardrobe, and their design
incorporates some brackets inside the wardrobe which can be screwed
through in order to secure to the wall.

My first error was to try to drill through these into the wall whilst
the wardrobe was still a little off balance - the back of the wardrobe
is on carpet which has grippers underneath, so the back is slightly
higher than the front. I had thouught I'd straightened it, but
obviously it had tipped slightly over night. This meant that between
the back of the wardrobe and the wall there was a gap approaching
70mm. Not appreciating this, I drilled through and realised I could
only get a few mm into the brick wall behind. I then bought a longer
(160mm x 7mm) masonry bit and continued the hole. Upshot was a hole
which was deep enough, but probably no longer only 7mm wide, and when
I tried to fix with a screw and brown plug it didn't provide any grip.

I've now straightened the wardrobe and am thinking about getting this
right. I'll be able to reuse the existing hole, but a rawlplug just
isn't going to cut it. So instead I'm thinking about sleeve anchors.
There will be a gap between the wardrobe and the wall because of the
skirting board, so lets assume this is 25mm. I'm thinking of either
10 x 75mm or 10 x 100mm sleeve anchors.

Is it OK to leave the "sleeve" sticking out from the wall? And if so,
how far / what proportion must be in the wall itself? Should I brace
the top of the wardrobe against the wall so that the bolt has
something to tighten against? Am I going about this in completely the
wrong way?

Any help gratefully received, as ever!

Thanks

Matt

"larkim" wrote in message
...
I'm in a pickle of my own making (lesson learned, think everything
through before you start....) but was hoping for possibly some advice
to help me out.

I have a 2m35 wardrobe with sliding doors in a childs bedroom. Given
their propensity to climb in or on anything, I'd like to make sure it
is secured to the wall. Its an Ikea wardrobe, and their design
incorporates some brackets inside the wardrobe which can be screwed
through in order to secure to the wall.

My first error was to try to drill through these into the wall whilst
the wardrobe was still a little off balance - the back of the wardrobe
is on carpet which has grippers underneath, so the back is slightly
higher than the front. I had thouught I'd straightened it, but
obviously it had tipped slightly over night. This meant that between
the back of the wardrobe and the wall there was a gap approaching
70mm. Not appreciating this, I drilled through and realised I could
only get a few mm into the brick wall behind. I then bought a longer
(160mm x 7mm) masonry bit and continued the hole. Upshot was a hole
which was deep enough, but probably no longer only 7mm wide, and when
I tried to fix with a screw and brown plug it didn't provide any grip.

I've now straightened the wardrobe and am thinking about getting this
right. I'll be able to reuse the existing hole, but a rawlplug just
isn't going to cut it. So instead I'm thinking about sleeve anchors.
There will be a gap between the wardrobe and the wall because of the
skirting board, so lets assume this is 25mm. I'm thinking of either
10 x 75mm or 10 x 100mm sleeve anchors.

Is it OK to leave the "sleeve" sticking out from the wall? And if so,
how far / what proportion must be in the wall itself? Should I brace
the top of the wardrobe against the wall so that the bolt has
something to tighten against? Am I going about this in completely the
wrong way?

Any help gratefully received, as ever!

I'd be inclined to fix a horisontal batten to the wall. This could be almost
the full width of the wardrobe and perhaps 1.5" x 5". The fixing could be 4"
No 10 woodsrews into blue plugs. You could have as many fixings as you like,
and it wouldn't matter if some of them failed. Once that's fixed securely
you can simply fix the wardrobe to it with woodscrews.

As for anchor bolts, I'd say that was making hard work of it, but the bottom
part of the sleeve should be at least an inch into good brick, so if the
mortar is half an inch there will need to be at the very least 2" of anchor
in the wall. 3" would be far better. It doesn't matter if the sleeve
protrudes as long as it doesn't deform. It will deform though, if the bolt
is really tight.

Have you checked for hidden cables?

Bill

On Oct 26, 1:12*pm, "Bill Wright"
wrote:
"larkim" wrote in message

...





I'm in a pickle of my own making (lesson learned, think everything
through before you start....) but was hoping for possibly some advice
to help me out.

I have a 2m35 wardrobe with sliding doors in a childs bedroom. *Given
their propensity to climb in or on anything, I'd like to make sure it
is secured to the wall. *Its an Ikea wardrobe, and their design
incorporates some brackets inside the wardrobe which can be screwed
through in order to secure to the wall.

My first error was to try to drill through these into the wall whilst
the wardrobe was still a little off balance - the back of the wardrobe
is on carpet which has grippers underneath, so the back is slightly
higher than the front. *I had thouught I'd straightened it, but
obviously it had tipped slightly over night. *This meant that between
the back of the wardrobe and the wall there was a gap approaching
70mm. *Not appreciating this, I drilled through and realised I could
only get a few mm into the brick wall behind. *I then bought a longer
(160mm x 7mm) masonry bit and continued the hole. *Upshot was a hole
which was deep enough, but probably no longer only 7mm wide, and when
I tried to fix with a screw and brown plug it didn't provide any grip.

I've now straightened the wardrobe and am thinking about getting this
right. *I'll be able to reuse the existing hole, but a rawlplug just
isn't going to cut it. *So instead I'm thinking about sleeve anchors.
There will be a gap between the wardrobe and the wall because of the
skirting board, so lets assume this is 25mm. *I'm thinking of either
10 x 75mm or 10 x 100mm sleeve anchors.

Is it OK to leave the "sleeve" sticking out from the wall? *And if so,
how far / what proportion must be in the wall itself? *Should I brace
the top of the wardrobe against the wall so that the bolt has
something to tighten against? *Am I going about this in completely the
wrong way?

Any help gratefully received, as ever!

I'd be inclined to fix a horisontal batten to the wall. This could be almost
the full width of the wardrobe and perhaps 1.5" x 5". The fixing could be 4"
No 10 woodsrews into blue plugs. You could have as many fixings as you like,
and it wouldn't matter if some of them failed. Once that's fixed securely
you can simply fix the wardrobe to it with woodscrews.

As for anchor bolts, I'd say that was making hard work of it, but the bottom
part of the sleeve should be at least an inch into good brick, so if the
mortar is half an inch there will need to be at the very least 2" of anchor
in the wall. 3" would be far better. It doesn't matter if the sleeve
protrudes as long as it doesn't deform. It will deform though, if the bolt
is really tight.

Have you checked for hidden cables?

Bill

Fancy coming across you over in DIY as well as digital-tv.....

Batten was my first thought actually, but I think I discounted it as I
was concerned about moving the wardrobe (its tall, I'm only 5'8" and
SWBMO isn't one for moving furniture). However, since then I've
relieved the cabinet of some of the excess weight (shelves, drawers,
sliding doors etc) so that might be feasible - certainly simpler.

Thanks for the hint about the sleeves - that sort of depth was my way
of thinking. They may well be overkill, but three of them securing
the wardrobe will certainly protect against the little darlings....

As for cables, that's fine - is actually an old exterior wall which
has been plastered over when we added a bedroom to the side of the
house. No cables / pipes in there.

Cheers!

Matt

On 26 Oct, 13:21, larkim wrote:
On Oct 26, 1:12*pm, "Bill Wright"
wrote:





"larkim" wrote in message

...

I'm in a pickle of my own making (lesson learned, think everything
through before you start....) but was hoping for possibly some advice
to help me out.

I have a 2m35 wardrobe with sliding doors in a childs bedroom. *Given
their propensity to climb in or on anything, I'd like to make sure it
is secured to the wall. *Its an Ikea wardrobe, and their design
incorporates some brackets inside the wardrobe which can be screwed
through in order to secure to the wall.

My first error was to try to drill through these into the wall whilst
the wardrobe was still a little off balance - the back of the wardrobe
is on carpet which has grippers underneath, so the back is slightly
higher than the front. *I had thouught I'd straightened it, but
obviously it had tipped slightly over night. *This meant that between
the back of the wardrobe and the wall there was a gap approaching
70mm. *Not appreciating this, I drilled through and realised I could
only get a few mm into the brick wall behind. *I then bought a longer
(160mm x 7mm) masonry bit and continued the hole. *Upshot was a hole
which was deep enough, but probably no longer only 7mm wide, and when
I tried to fix with a screw and brown plug it didn't provide any grip..

I've now straightened the wardrobe and am thinking about getting this
right. *I'll be able to reuse the existing hole, but a rawlplug just
isn't going to cut it. *So instead I'm thinking about sleeve anchors.
There will be a gap between the wardrobe and the wall because of the
skirting board, so lets assume this is 25mm. *I'm thinking of either
10 x 75mm or 10 x 100mm sleeve anchors.

Is it OK to leave the "sleeve" sticking out from the wall? *And if so,
how far / what proportion must be in the wall itself? *Should I brace
the top of the wardrobe against the wall so that the bolt has
something to tighten against? *Am I going about this in completely the
wrong way?

Any help gratefully received, as ever!

I'd be inclined to fix a horisontal batten to the wall. This could be almost
the full width of the wardrobe and perhaps 1.5" x 5". The fixing could be 4"
No 10 woodsrews into blue plugs. You could have as many fixings as you like,
and it wouldn't matter if some of them failed. Once that's fixed securely
you can simply fix the wardrobe to it with woodscrews.

As for anchor bolts, I'd say that was making hard work of it, but the bottom
part of the sleeve should be at least an inch into good brick, so if the
mortar is half an inch there will need to be at the very least 2" of anchor
in the wall. 3" would be far better. It doesn't matter if the sleeve
protrudes as long as it doesn't deform. It will deform though, if the bolt
is really tight.

Have you checked for hidden cables?

Bill

Fancy coming across you over in DIY as well as digital-tv.....

Batten was my first thought actually, but I think I discounted it as I
was concerned about moving the wardrobe (its tall, I'm only 5'8" and
SWBMO isn't one for moving furniture). *However, since then I've
relieved the cabinet of some of the excess weight (shelves, drawers,
sliding doors etc) so that might be feasible - certainly simpler.

Thanks for the hint about the sleeves - that sort of depth was my way
of thinking. *They may well be overkill, but three of them securing
the wardrobe will certainly protect against the little darlings....

As for cables, that's fine - is actually an old exterior wall which
has been plastered over when we added a bedroom to the side of the
house. *No cables / pipes in there.

I have found it makes sense to put a little bit of ply or hardboard
under the front of furninture to take care of the fact that you have
the gripper under the carpet at the back. Ideally you want the
furniture to slope back towards the wall. Hope this helps.
Tim

Tim Decker wrote:
On 26 Oct, 13:21, larkim wrote:
On Oct 26, 1:12 pm, "Bill Wright"
wrote:





"larkim" wrote in message
...
I'm in a pickle of my own making (lesson learned, think everything
through before you start....) but was hoping for possibly some advice
to help me out.
I have a 2m35 wardrobe with sliding doors in a childs bedroom. Given
their propensity to climb in or on anything, I'd like to make sure it
is secured to the wall. Its an Ikea wardrobe, and their design
incorporates some brackets inside the wardrobe which can be screwed
through in order to secure to the wall.
My first error was to try to drill through these into the wall whilst
the wardrobe was still a little off balance - the back of the wardrobe
is on carpet which has grippers underneath, so the back is slightly
higher than the front. I had thouught I'd straightened it, but
obviously it had tipped slightly over night. This meant that between
the back of the wardrobe and the wall there was a gap approaching
70mm. Not appreciating this, I drilled through and realised I could
only get a few mm into the brick wall behind. I then bought a longer
(160mm x 7mm) masonry bit and continued the hole. Upshot was a hole
which was deep enough, but probably no longer only 7mm wide, and when
I tried to fix with a screw and brown plug it didn't provide any grip.
I've now straightened the wardrobe and am thinking about getting this
right. I'll be able to reuse the existing hole, but a rawlplug just
isn't going to cut it. So instead I'm thinking about sleeve anchors.
There will be a gap between the wardrobe and the wall because of the
skirting board, so lets assume this is 25mm. I'm thinking of either
10 x 75mm or 10 x 100mm sleeve anchors.
Is it OK to leave the "sleeve" sticking out from the wall? And if so,
how far / what proportion must be in the wall itself? Should I brace
the top of the wardrobe against the wall so that the bolt has
something to tighten against? Am I going about this in completely the
wrong way?
Any help gratefully received, as ever!
I'd be inclined to fix a horisontal batten to the wall. This could be almost
the full width of the wardrobe and perhaps 1.5" x 5". The fixing could be 4"
No 10 woodsrews into blue plugs. You could have as many fixings as you like,
and it wouldn't matter if some of them failed. Once that's fixed securely
you can simply fix the wardrobe to it with woodscrews.
As for anchor bolts, I'd say that was making hard work of it, but the bottom
part of the sleeve should be at least an inch into good brick, so if the
mortar is half an inch there will need to be at the very least 2" of anchor
in the wall. 3" would be far better. It doesn't matter if the sleeve
protrudes as long as it doesn't deform. It will deform though, if the bolt
is really tight.
Have you checked for hidden cables?
Bill
Fancy coming across you over in DIY as well as digital-tv.....

Batten was my first thought actually, but I think I discounted it as I
was concerned about moving the wardrobe (its tall, I'm only 5'8" and
SWBMO isn't one for moving furniture). However, since then I've
relieved the cabinet of some of the excess weight (shelves, drawers,
sliding doors etc) so that might be feasible - certainly simpler.

Thanks for the hint about the sleeves - that sort of depth was my way
of thinking. They may well be overkill, but three of them securing
the wardrobe will certainly protect against the little darlings....

As for cables, that's fine - is actually an old exterior wall which
has been plastered over when we added a bedroom to the side of the
house. No cables / pipes in there.

I have found it makes sense to put a little bit of ply or hardboard
under the front of furninture to take care of the fact that you have
the gripper under the carpet at the back. Ideally you want the
furniture to slope back towards the wall. Hope this helps.
Tim

I'd fill the hole(s) with car body filler and start again. Pack it out
at the front with scraps of whatever to keep it against the wall and
re-drill

On Oct 26, 3:59*pm, Tim Decker wrote:
On 26 Oct, 13:21, larkim wrote:



On Oct 26, 1:12*pm, "Bill Wright"
wrote:

"larkim" wrote in message

....

I'm in a pickle of my own making (lesson learned, think everything
through before you start....) but was hoping for possibly some advice
to help me out.

I have a 2m35 wardrobe with sliding doors in a childs bedroom. *Given
their propensity to climb in or on anything, I'd like to make sure it
is secured to the wall. *Its an Ikea wardrobe, and their design
incorporates some brackets inside the wardrobe which can be screwed
through in order to secure to the wall.

My first error was to try to drill through these into the wall whilst
the wardrobe was still a little off balance - the back of the wardrobe
is on carpet which has grippers underneath, so the back is slightly
higher than the front. *I had thouught I'd straightened it, but
obviously it had tipped slightly over night. *This meant that between
the back of the wardrobe and the wall there was a gap approaching
70mm. *Not appreciating this, I drilled through and realised I could
only get a few mm into the brick wall behind. *I then bought a longer
(160mm x 7mm) masonry bit and continued the hole. *Upshot was a hole
which was deep enough, but probably no longer only 7mm wide, and when
I tried to fix with a screw and brown plug it didn't provide any grip.

I've now straightened the wardrobe and am thinking about getting this
right. *I'll be able to reuse the existing hole, but a rawlplug just
isn't going to cut it. *So instead I'm thinking about sleeve anchors.
There will be a gap between the wardrobe and the wall because of the
skirting board, so lets assume this is 25mm. *I'm thinking of either
10 x 75mm or 10 x 100mm sleeve anchors.

Is it OK to leave the "sleeve" sticking out from the wall? *And if so,
how far / what proportion must be in the wall itself? *Should I brace
the top of the wardrobe against the wall so that the bolt has
something to tighten against? *Am I going about this in completely the
wrong way?

Any help gratefully received, as ever!

I'd be inclined to fix a horisontal batten to the wall. This could be almost
the full width of the wardrobe and perhaps 1.5" x 5". The fixing could be 4"
No 10 woodsrews into blue plugs. You could have as many fixings as you like,
and it wouldn't matter if some of them failed. Once that's fixed securely
you can simply fix the wardrobe to it with woodscrews.

As for anchor bolts, I'd say that was making hard work of it, but the bottom
part of the sleeve should be at least an inch into good brick, so if the
mortar is half an inch there will need to be at the very least 2" of anchor
in the wall. 3" would be far better. It doesn't matter if the sleeve
protrudes as long as it doesn't deform. It will deform though, if the bolt
is really tight.

Have you checked for hidden cables?

Bill

Fancy coming across you over in DIY as well as digital-tv.....

Batten was my first thought actually, but I think I discounted it as I
was concerned about moving the wardrobe (its tall, I'm only 5'8" and
SWBMO isn't one for moving furniture). *However, since then I've
relieved the cabinet of some of the excess weight (shelves, drawers,
sliding doors etc) so that might be feasible - certainly simpler.

Thanks for the hint about the sleeves - that sort of depth was my way
of thinking. *They may well be overkill, but three of them securing
the wardrobe will certainly protect against the little darlings....

As for cables, that's fine - is actually an old exterior wall which
has been plastered over when we added a bedroom to the side of the
house. *No cables / pipes in there.

I have found it makes sense to put a little bit of ply or hardboard
under the front of furninture to take care of the fact that you have
the gripper under the carpet at the back. Ideally you want the
furniture to slope back towards the wall. *Hope this helps.
Tim

Agreed. To sort the slope I'm using adjustable spacers such as you'd
use to maintain gaps around the wall when you're laying laminate
flooring. Shame is that this leaves a small gap between the carpet
and the bottom of the wardrobe, but I can live with that to make sure
that 80+kg of wardrobe doesn't get pulled over onto my kids!

Matt

Tim Decker wrote:


I have found it makes sense to put a little bit of ply or hardboard
under the front of furninture to take care of the fact that you have
the gripper under the carpet at the back. Ideally you want the
furniture to slope back towards the wall. Hope this helps.

(Hello Tim)

I use these purpose made wedges
http://www.screwfix.com/prods/54407/...-WEDGE-_-54407
handy for all sorts of things.



--
Dave - The Medway Handyman
www.medwayhandyman.co.uk

"larkim" wrote in message
...
On Oct 26, 1:12 pm, "Bill Wright"
wrote:
Fancy coming across you over in DIY as well as digital-tv.....

They seek him here, they seek him there . . .

Thanks for the hint about the sleeves - that sort of depth was my way
of thinking. They may well be overkill, but three of them securing
the wardrobe will certainly protect against the little darlings....

When our twins were 13 months old we heard a crash from upstairs. The boy
had stood up and somehow rocked backwards and forwards and tipped his cot
over! We couldn't believe how he'd done it. He was a small baby for his age,
but very active. The accident didn't hurt him. I fixed both cots back to the
wall with TV aerial wall brackets! It looked delightful!

Bill

On Oct 26, 1:21*pm, larkim wrote:
On Oct 26, 1:12*pm, "Bill Wright"
wrote:





"larkim" wrote in message

...

I'm in a pickle of my own making (lesson learned, think everything
through before you start....) but was hoping for possibly some advice
to help me out.

I have a 2m35 wardrobe with sliding doors in a childs bedroom. *Given
their propensity to climb in or on anything, I'd like to make sure it
is secured to the wall. *Its an Ikea wardrobe, and their design
incorporates some brackets inside the wardrobe which can be screwed
through in order to secure to the wall.

My first error was to try to drill through these into the wall whilst
the wardrobe was still a little off balance - the back of the wardrobe
is on carpet which has grippers underneath, so the back is slightly
higher than the front. *I had thouught I'd straightened it, but
obviously it had tipped slightly over night. *This meant that between
the back of the wardrobe and the wall there was a gap approaching
70mm. *Not appreciating this, I drilled through and realised I could
only get a few mm into the brick wall behind. *I then bought a longer
(160mm x 7mm) masonry bit and continued the hole. *Upshot was a hole
which was deep enough, but probably no longer only 7mm wide, and when
I tried to fix with a screw and brown plug it didn't provide any grip..

I've now straightened the wardrobe and am thinking about getting this
right. *I'll be able to reuse the existing hole, but a rawlplug just
isn't going to cut it. *So instead I'm thinking about sleeve anchors.
There will be a gap between the wardrobe and the wall because of the
skirting board, so lets assume this is 25mm. *I'm thinking of either
10 x 75mm or 10 x 100mm sleeve anchors.

Is it OK to leave the "sleeve" sticking out from the wall? *And if so,
how far / what proportion must be in the wall itself? *Should I brace
the top of the wardrobe against the wall so that the bolt has
something to tighten against? *Am I going about this in completely the
wrong way?

Any help gratefully received, as ever!

I'd be inclined to fix a horisontal batten to the wall. This could be almost
the full width of the wardrobe and perhaps 1.5" x 5". The fixing could be 4"
No 10 woodsrews into blue plugs. You could have as many fixings as you like,
and it wouldn't matter if some of them failed. Once that's fixed securely
you can simply fix the wardrobe to it with woodscrews.

As for anchor bolts, I'd say that was making hard work of it, but the bottom
part of the sleeve should be at least an inch into good brick, so if the
mortar is half an inch there will need to be at the very least 2" of anchor
in the wall. 3" would be far better. It doesn't matter if the sleeve
protrudes as long as it doesn't deform. It will deform though, if the bolt
is really tight.

Have you checked for hidden cables?

Bill

Fancy coming across you over in DIY as well as digital-tv.....

Batten was my first thought actually, but I think I discounted it as I
was concerned about moving the wardrobe (its tall, I'm only 5'8" and
SWBMO isn't one for moving furniture). *However, since then I've
relieved the cabinet of some of the excess weight (shelves, drawers,
sliding doors etc) so that might be feasible - certainly simpler.

Thanks for the hint about the sleeves - that sort of depth was my way
of thinking. *They may well be overkill, but three of them securing
the wardrobe will certainly protect against the little darlings....

As for cables, that's fine - is actually an old exterior wall which
has been plastered over when we added a bedroom to the side of the
house. *No cables / pipes in there.

Cheers!

Matt

You could batten without moving the wardrobe if you have reasonable
clearance to the ceiling - use something like 4 x 1 (or maybe some
skirting to be the same thickness as the gap). Stick it down behind
the wardrobe with enough sticking up above the top of the wardrobe to
get the fixings in. Probably worth a bead of gripfill on the bottom
edge too to make sure it can't be levered away from the wall by the
wardrobe.

A

On Oct 26, 7:14*pm, "Bill Wright"
wrote:
"larkim" wrote in message

...
On Oct 26, 1:12 pm, "Bill Wright"
wrote:
Fancy coming across you over in DIY as well as digital-tv.....

They seek him here, they seek him there . . .

Thanks for the hint about the sleeves - that sort of depth was my way

of thinking. *They may well be overkill, but three of them securing
the wardrobe will certainly protect against the little darlings....

When our twins were 13 months old we heard a crash from upstairs. The boy
had stood up and somehow rocked backwards and forwards and tipped his cot
over! We couldn't believe how he'd done it. He was a small baby for his age,
but very active. The accident didn't hurt him. I fixed both cots back to the
wall with TV aerial wall brackets! It looked delightful!

Bill

When I was about 8 years old I had a rocking horse which my sister and
I used to rest on its side and turn into a spaceship (!). We had the
bright idea of tying the "spaceship" to a "caravan" (wardrobe) by
using our dressing gown cords to tie to the handles of the wardrobe.
We set off across the universe, sliding the spaceship this way and
that.

My parents were woken that Sunday morning by a loud crash to discover
myself and my sister underneath a large wardrobe (fortunately unhurt)
tied bizarrely to a rocking horse.

Kids, eh!?

Matt

"larkim" wrote in message
...
On Oct 26, 7:14 pm, "Bill Wright"
wrote:
When I was about 8 years old I had a rocking horse which my sister and
I used to rest on its side and turn into a spaceship (!). We had the
bright idea of tying the "spaceship" to a "caravan" (wardrobe) by
using our dressing gown cords to tie to the handles of the wardrobe.
We set off across the universe, sliding the spaceship this way and
that.

My parents were woken that Sunday morning by a loud crash to discover
myself and my sister underneath a large wardrobe (fortunately unhurt)
tied bizarrely to a rocking horse.


When I was nine I went into hospital because the top of my legs swelled up
like balloons. In the middle of the ward was a large traditional rocking
horse. There was a boy in the next bed who was very frail, and was told that
he must stay in bed, or if he did get up he had to be very careful. So I got
him on the rocking horse when no-one was around, and somehow he ended up
going over the horse's head and landing on the floor. There was a fuss, and
Matron came and told me off.

Bill

On 28/10/09 03:18, Bill Wright wrote:

When I was nine I went into hospital
because the top of my legs swelled up
like balloons.

Just a little pinprick.
There'll be no more ... aaaaaahhhhh!
But you may feel a little sick.