So, the kitchen needs plastering (ready for the new units) and we had a
recommended (master) plasterer come and give us a quote.

The bath's been leaking and had damaged a ceiling board so that might
need replacing and the ceiling is artexed (or then again it might not
be).

Plasterer: "Ah I see you've got the ceiling papered"

Us: "No it's artex. All the ceilings are"

Him: "No it's wood chip paper - i bet it's been damaged in the past and
they just papered over."

Us: "No it's not"

He proceeds to pick away at the damaged part of the ceiling and
proclaims "Woodchip!" while holding a thumbnail sized flake in his
hand.

Well, we just looked at each other

Him: "Tell you what, get a steamer and strip the paper off and then I
can get a better idea of what state the ceiling is in but for now I'll
say XXX pounds".

Me (telepathically): "Strip the ceiling? Go f### yourself matey"

We said out farewells to him and debated on what he said. SWMBO starts
picking of the artex cum wood chip and says he's talking out of his
arse.

It's gotta be artex. Once you flake away the paint it's a plaster
colour underneath.

However could we be mistaken. Could the (master) plasterer be
mistaken? If so how could he make that mistake?

Who decides he's a master anyway? (apart from the quality of his work).

2nd and 3rd quotes still to come.

"AnthB" wrote in message
ups.com...
So, the kitchen needs plastering (ready for the new units) and we had a
recommended (master) plasterer come and give us a quote.

The bath's been leaking and had damaged a ceiling board so that might
need replacing and the ceiling is artexed (or then again it might not
be).

Plasterer: "Ah I see you've got the ceiling papered"

Us: "No it's artex. All the ceilings are"

Him: "No it's wood chip paper - i bet it's been damaged in the past and
they just papered over."

Us: "No it's not"

He proceeds to pick away at the damaged part of the ceiling and
proclaims "Woodchip!" while holding a thumbnail sized flake in his
hand.

Well, we just looked at each other

Him: "Tell you what, get a steamer and strip the paper off and then I
can get a better idea of what state the ceiling is in but for now I'll
say XXX pounds".

Me (telepathically): "Strip the ceiling? Go f### yourself matey"

We said out farewells to him and debated on what he said. SWMBO starts
picking of the artex cum wood chip and says he's talking out of his
arse.

It's gotta be artex. Once you flake away the paint it's a plaster
colour underneath.

However could we be mistaken. Could the (master) plasterer be
mistaken? If so how could he make that mistake?

Who decides he's a master anyway? (apart from the quality of his work).

2nd and 3rd quotes still to come.

The only way to find out if it is Artex or Woodchip is to pull one of the
lumps off. If it's Artex it'll be like plaster all the way through. If
it's Woodchip it'll have a lump of wood in it.

Doh!

So simple.

Ah my brain can't take this heat.

"BigWallop" wrote in message
. uk...

The only way to find out if it is Artex or Woodchip is to pull one of the
lumps off. If it's Artex it'll be like plaster all the way through. If
it's Woodchip it'll have a lump of wood in it.


Is woodchip always really wood inside?? Seems like they could use any old
sweepings if they wanted..