I'm flyin' solo tonight, for the first time since Mary died on 19
March and what I thought was my disfunctional non-nuclear extended
family slammed around me like BB's to a supermagnet.

I left daughter Karen at the airport about 8:30 PM after we'd joined
Kevin for dinner at a pizza place near his house. He rode his bike
so he could have a couple of beers with his pizza.

I'm doin' OK tonight.

Karen introduced me to a different acupuncture place today. I liked
the place today MUCH better. The guy yesterday is a Dr. of something
(probably O.M), has a bunch of creds and clients/patients/suckers I
know from my neighborhood. But they did their puncturing in
isolation (private room) with me flat on my back. Man, I hate that!

The community place that Karen discovered or knew about is in NE Mnpls
about a block from the old Grain Belt Brewery, upstairs in a building
built in the '20's and later renovated. Nordeast is an old
neighborhood, originally populated mostly by immigrants from Eastern
Europe. It's had its ups and downs but it has never gone into decay.
At present it is trendy, has an active arts community. There are
many bars and many churches. Crime is low and the gangs live and
operate mostly elsewhere.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Northeast,_Minneapolis

This acupuncture place is very much part of the neighborhood and
community.
http://www.necommunityacupuncture.co...N/Welcome.html

It felt completely different than the one in Fridley. It is done in
a group setting with 4 or 5 recliners in a room. The first guy felt
competent and confident but distant, cool, brusque and clinical. The
second place mentioned something about "healing energy" in a group,
which sounded to me like floobydust and bull****, but I must say it
felt much better. I felt like Deborah brought empathy to me and to
her work. I also felt that during Mary's visits to and care at Mayo.
Chemo at Mayo is done in very similar group settings, with patient
repositories that are much more like recliners than hospital beds, and
the professionals throughout Mayo were incredibly warm, caring and
compassionate. Compassion is in their mission statement.

Deborah said that I shouldn't expect instant success as sometimes
happens with physical pains etc. It might take several sessions
before I notice improvement, but she was quite sure she could help me.
The complaint I stated in my questionaire was "grief-induced anxiety".
I asked how I'd know if any improvement I noted was due to acupuncture
vs just time passing and healing that would have occurred anyway. She
said when I start to become satisfied with my progress I could reduce
the frequency of my acupuncture visits until I'm no longer satisfied
with my progress or feel like I'm regressing.

Regression setbacks are normal and to be expected in the grief process
but I still found her answer satisfactory.

She recommended twice a week for a couple of weeks and then I might
want to reduce frequency and see how that works for me. Oy kin do
thet.

I'm willing to give this a fair trial. It does seem to work for
others. If it's placebo effect, I'll take it.
Who knows, in a month I may be as tough as the redoubtable Hong Kong
Phooey.

Now I'm wondering what to do with that black jug of fermented
gawd-knows-whut that Karen left in my downstairs fridge.

The housekeeper Mary hired will be here tomorrow for a coupla hours on
her biweekly visit. I want to retain her because Mary found her work
quite satisfactory. When she's gone, I think I'll mosey up to Anoka
to renew my carry permit at the sheriff's office. Thence to St. Paul
to join shooting buds Todd 'n Laura for dinner.

The chemolawn guy rang my doorbell this morning. He started his usual
sales pitch to sell me more than I want by asking about Mary. Without
being unduly harsh, I told him somewhat tersely.

That shut him right up. He even teared up a bit and offered me a hug.
People liked Mary.

He said he'd spread extra heavy on the fert and pre-emergent crabgrass
stuff because there was an area in the front yard that could use some
raking. There's a maple tree of amazing endurance, won't shed her
leaves until there's snow on the ground.

I asked if he knew of a service that could take care of that for me.
He didn't but he'd ask around.

A few minutes later, I was schlepping down the driveway en route for
my 3 miles when I tumbled that my 3 miles is merely aerobic exercise
that could be equally benefical and perhaps more productive if done
with a rake. I purely hate raking leaves, always have, but I could
spend my hour raking as well as walking. So I did. Karen came out
and joined me, after her morning run. We got the job done in exactly
an hour, my allocated time for aerobic exercise. Raking was somewhat
more aerobic than my walks because Karen is an athlete, but I surived
it and probably benefitted from the stretch.

Life lurches on.

Thanks for sharing, Don.

I've always thought acupunture was BS. Glad to see a real scientist
doing the evaluation.

Karl

Don Foreman wrote:
There's a maple tree of amazing endurance, won't shed her
leaves until there's snow on the ground.

The oak tree in my front yard is like that. When all of the other trees
have dropped their leaves and the city is doing leaf pickup, that is when it
just starts to turn the leaves brown. It doesn't drop them until a month or
so later.

On the flip side, in the springtime it is late in developing its new
foliage, but it is a rather vigorous tree which has survived 16 years thus
far, so there must be a method to its madness.

Jon

Don Foreman wrote:

I'm flyin' solo tonight, for the first time since Mary died on 19
March and what I thought was my disfunctional non-nuclear extended
family slammed around me like BB's to a supermagnet.

Well, there's "solo," and there's "solo." I'm still here, caring and
following, but don't have much to contribute, other than I care. I'm
the kind of half-ass recovered alcoholic that can quote platitudes,
like, "You're not going to pack a year of healing into one day," and
**** like that.

Frankly, if I had to pick between the actual physical people I know
and that great amorphous "USENET" stuff, I'd pick USENET. :-)

Thanks!
Rich

Don Foreman wrote:

I purely hate raking leaves, always have, but I could
spend my hour raking as well as walking. So I did. Karen came out
and joined me, after her morning run. We got the job done in exactly
an hour, my allocated time for aerobic exercise. Raking was somewhat
more aerobic than my walks because Karen is an athlete, but I surived
it and probably benefitted from the stretch.

Raking is way more aerobic, quite often anaerobic. I believe you got a real workout. This
is based on my annual raking of pine needles, oak leaves and pine tree branches from the
windstorms.

Wes

On Wed, 13 Apr 2011 12:01:15 -0700, Rich Grise
wrote:

Don Foreman wrote:

I'm flyin' solo tonight, for the first time since Mary died on 19
March and what I thought was my disfunctional non-nuclear extended
family slammed around me like BB's to a supermagnet.

Well, there's "solo," and there's "solo."

Roger that! I've had incredible support from what I regarded as my
non-nuclear dysfunctional family. I'm far from alone. I have sons
here in town, good friends and good neighbors.

Fuggedabout poor, poor pitiful me, that ain't happenin'. I'm having a
tough low crawl up a sharp rockpile but I'm far from alone. My "solo"
is a night and a day with nobody else in my house. Been there done
that many times when Mar was on overseas travel and since 7 Feb in the
rehab, but it has seemed very different since she died and I could no
longer see her face, help her get ready for bed and hold her hand
until she went to sleep each day.