DIYbanter

DIYbanter (https://www.diybanter.com/)
-   Metalworking (https://www.diybanter.com/metalworking/)
-   -   Golf (https://www.diybanter.com/metalworking/129644-golf.html)

Cliff November 16th 05 12:46 PM

Golf
 
[
A man out playing golf slices off into the woods. When he goes to find
the ball he discovers a witch (hat and all) stirring a cauldron. So
out of curiosity he asks her what she is brewing.

"A magic potion" she replies.

"Well, what is it for?" he asks.

"This potion will make anyone an excellent golfer."

At this he gets really excited and asks if he can have some. She is
agreeable but warns him that it will have dire consequences on his sex
life.

After a short period of soul searching he decides to try the potion.
He goes back to the golf course and completes an excellent game of
golf. Next he challenges the golf pro and beats him easily. He spends
every possible moment of the next year playing golf at every course he
manages to get to and having a wonderful time of it. After a year he
finds himself back at the same course where he found the witch. Out of
curiosity he slices one into the woods so he can talk to her.

"Well," she asks, "how has your game been?"

"Great! This has been the best year of my life. I have played all over
the country and never lost a game."

"And how about your sex life?"

"Oh, not bad."

"Really? This stuff can really ruin a guy's sex life. Say, how many
times did you have sex last year?"

"Hmmmm, it was three, no, four times."

"And you call that not bad?"

"Not for a priest with a small parish."
]

Mark November 16th 05 04:52 PM

Golf
 
Possibly derived from the original Irish leprechaun story.
For witch stories, I prefer the one with the punch line:
"a little old to be believing in witches, aren't you?"....
/mark


Cliff wrote:

[
A man out playing golf slices off into the woods. When he goes to find
the ball he discovers a witch (hat and all) stirring a cauldron. So
out of curiosity he asks her what she is brewing.

"A magic potion" she replies.

"Well, what is it for?" he asks.

"This potion will make anyone an excellent golfer."

At this he gets really excited and asks if he can have some. She is
agreeable but warns him that it will have dire consequences on his sex
life.

After a short period of soul searching he decides to try the potion.
He goes back to the golf course and completes an excellent game of
golf. Next he challenges the golf pro and beats him easily. He spends
every possible moment of the next year playing golf at every course he
manages to get to and having a wonderful time of it. After a year he
finds himself back at the same course where he found the witch. Out of
curiosity he slices one into the woods so he can talk to her.

"Well," she asks, "how has your game been?"

"Great! This has been the best year of my life. I have played all over
the country and never lost a game."

"And how about your sex life?"

"Oh, not bad."

"Really? This stuff can really ruin a guy's sex life. Say, how many
times did you have sex last year?"

"Hmmmm, it was three, no, four times."

"And you call that not bad?"

"Not for a priest with a small parish."
]


mewthree November 19th 05 12:51 PM

Golf
 
tell us the joke then.
"Mark" wrote in message
...
Possibly derived from the original Irish leprechaun story.
For witch stories, I prefer the one with the punch line:
"a little old to be believing in witches, aren't you?"....
/mark





Tom Accuosti November 19th 05 07:26 PM

Golf
 
"J. Nielsen" wrote in message


| The short guy says, "Bruce? You're 32 and you still believe in
| Leprechauns?!"

sprays coffee all over desk

Damn, and I really liked that keyboard, too.

moT





Stormin Mormon November 20th 05 12:16 AM

Golf
 
Heck, I had to clean the wall behind the monitor.

--

Christopher A. Young
Do good work.
It's longer in the short run
but shorter in the long run.
..
..


"Tom Accuosti" wrote in message
. ..
"J. Nielsen" wrote in message


| The short guy says, "Bruce? You're 32 and you still believe in
| Leprechauns?!"

sprays coffee all over desk

Damn, and I really liked that keyboard, too.

moT






E.B. November 20th 05 12:23 AM

Golf
 
Pace Picante sauce is all over my shirt.

E.



All times are GMT +1. The time now is 09:18 PM.

Powered by vBulletin® Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Copyright ©2004 - 2014 DIYbanter