Some people here may not get it as it's in English.
Stolen from another group

ESSEX HURRICANE APPEAL

A major hurricane (Hurricane Shazza) and earthquake measuring 5.8
on the Richter scale hit Essex in the early hours of Friday with its
epicentre in Basildon. Victims were seen wandering around
aimlessly, muttering "Faaackinell".

The hurricane decimated the area causing
approximately £30 worth of damage. Several priceless collections of
mementos from Majorca and the Costa Del Sol were damaged beyond
repair.

Three areas of historic burnt out cars were
disturbed. Many locals were woken well before their giros arrived.
Essex FM reported that hundreds of residents were confused and
bewildered and were still trying to come to terms with the fact that
something interesting had happened in Basildon.

One resident - Tracy Sharon Smith, a 15-year-old mother of 5
said, "It was such a shock, my little
Chardonnay-Mercedes came running into my bedroom crying. My youngest
two, Tyler-Morgan and Victoria-Storm slept through it all. I was still
shaking
when I was skinning up and watching Trisha the next morning."

Apparently looting, muggings and car crime
were unaffected and carried on as normal.

The British Red Cross has so far managed to ship 4,000 crates of
Sunny Delight to the area to help the stricken locals. Rescue workers
are still searching through the rubble and have found large quantities
of personal belongings, including benefit books, jewellery from
Elizabeth Duke at Argos and Bone China from Poundland.


HOW CAN YOU HELP?
This appeal is to raise money for food and clothing parcels for
those unfortunate enough to be caught up in this disaster. Clothing is
most sought after - items most needed include:


Fila or Burberry baseball caps


Kappa tracksuit tops (his and hers)


Shell suits (female)


White sport socks


Rockport boots


Any other items usually sold in
Primark.


Food parcels may be harder to come by, but are
needed all the same. Required foodstuffs include:


Microwave meals, Tins of baked beans, Ice
cream, Cans of Colt 45 or Special Brew. 22p buys a biro for filling in
the
compensation forms.


£2 buys chips, crisps and blue fizzy drinks for a family of 9. £5
buys B& H and a lighter to calm the nerves of those
affected.


**Breaking news**

Rescue workers found a girl in the rubble smothered in
raspberry Alco-pop. 'Where are you bleeding from?' they asked.

"ROMFORD" said the girl, "woss that gotta do
wiv you?

On 1/28/2012 11:37 AM, harry wrote:
Some people here may not get it as it's in English.
Stolen from another group

ESSEX HURRICANE APPEAL

A major hurricane (Hurricane Shazza) and earthquake measuring 5.8
on the Richter scale hit Essex in the early hours of Friday with its
epicentre in Basildon. Victims were seen wandering around
aimlessly, muttering "Faaackinell".

The hurricane decimated the area causing
approximately £30 worth of damage. Several priceless collections of
mementos from Majorca and the Costa Del Sol were damaged beyond
repair.



Gee, that's far worse than the terrible earthquake damage in the US last
year:

http://tinyurl.com/7jv4a8t

On Jan 28, 5:50*pm, Frank wrote:
On 1/28/2012 11:37 AM, harry wrote:





Some people here may not get it as it's in English.
Stolen from another group

* * * * * * * * * * * ESSEX HURRICANE APPEAL

* * A major hurricane (Hurricane Shazza) and earthquake measuring 5..8
on the Richter scale hit Essex in the early hours of Friday with its
epicentre in Basildon. Victims were seen wandering around
aimlessly, muttering "Faaackinell".

* * * *The hurricane decimated the area causing
approximately £30 worth of damage. Several priceless collections of
mementos from Majorca and the Costa Del Sol were damaged beyond
repair.

Gee, that's far worse than the terrible earthquake damage in the US last
year:

Terrible suffering!

On 1/29/2012 1:07 AM, harry wrote:
On Jan 28, 5:50 pm, wrote:
On 1/28/2012 11:37 AM, harry wrote:





Some people here may not get it as it's in English.
Stolen from another group
ESSEX HURRICANE APPEAL
A major hurricane (Hurricane Shazza) and earthquake measuring 5.8
on the Richter scale hit Essex in the early hours of Friday with its
epicentre in Basildon. Victims were seen wandering around
aimlessly, muttering "Faaackinell".
The hurricane decimated the area causing
approximately £30 worth of damage. Several priceless collections of
mementos from Majorca and the Costa Del Sol were damaged beyond
repair.
Gee, that's far worse than the terrible earthquake damage in the US last
year:
Terrible suffering!

If you watch the news that's what they would have you believe. Sells
more papers, as my dear old mom would say.

On Jan 29, 7:14*am, Jim T wrote:
On 1/29/2012 1:07 AM, harry wrote:





On Jan 28, 5:50 pm, *wrote:
On 1/28/2012 11:37 AM, harry wrote:

Some people here may not get it as it's in English.
Stolen from another group
* * * * * * * * * * * *ESSEX HURRICANE APPEAL
* * *A major hurricane (Hurricane Shazza) and earthquake measuring 5.8
on the Richter scale hit Essex in the early hours of Friday with its
epicentre in Basildon. Victims were seen wandering around
aimlessly, muttering "Faaackinell".
* * * * The hurricane decimated the area causing
approximately £30 worth of damage. Several priceless collections of
mementos from Majorca and the Costa Del Sol were damaged beyond
repair.
Gee, that's far worse than the terrible earthquake damage in the US last
year:
Terrible suffering!

If you watch the news that's what they would have you believe. Sells
more papers, as my dear old mom would say.- Hide quoted text -

- Show quoted text -

Heh Heh. Not a news item.
Just taking the **** out of Essex (UK) people who are reputed to be
Chavs, Bimbos and Mondeo Men.

On a par with your "redneck" jokes.

http://www.toytowngermany.com/lofi/i...hp/t41522.html
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/motoring/...any-more..html
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7J6fm8zpCUY
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MuGL_EffCJ0