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Louisiana Sold!
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Jim
Posts: n/a
Louisiana Sold!
wrote:
:: In the eye of hurricane Katrina, Michael Smithe was cooking an
Omulet
:: in his New Orleans kitchen. Suddenly the omulet came to life and
:: jumped out of the frying pan, hitting Smithe in the face and
knocking
:: him unconscious on his kitchen floor. The omulet then crashed thru
:: his kitchen window and was sucked out into the atmosphere by the
:: hurricane winds.
::
BATON ROUGE, LA. - The White House announced today that President Bush
has
successfully sold the state of Louisiana back to the French at more
than
double its original selling price of $11,250,000.
"This is a bold step forward for America," said Bush. "And America
will be
stronger and better as a result. I stand here today in unity with
French
Prime Minister Jack Sharaq, who was so kind to accept my offer of
Louisiana
in exchange for 25 million dollars cash."
The state, ravaged by Hurricane Katrina, will cost hundreds of
billions of
dollars to rebuild.
"Jack understands full well that this one's a 'fixer upper,'" said
Bush. "He
and the French people are quite prepared to pump out all that water,
and
make Louisiana a decent place to live again. And they've got a lot of
work
to do. But Jack's assured me, if it's not right, they're going to fix
it."
The move has been met with incredulity from the beleaguered residents
of
Louisiana.
"Shuba-pie!" said New Orleans resident Willis Babineaux. "Frafer-perly
yum
kom drabby sham!"
However, President Bush's decision has been widely lauded by
Republicans.
"This is an unexpected but brilliant move by the President," said
Senate
Majority Leader Bill Frist. "Instead of spending billions and
billions, and
billions of dollars rebuilding the state of Louisiana, we've just made
25
million dollars in pure profit."
"This is indeed a smart move," commented Fox News analyst Brit Hume.
"Not
only have we stopped the flooding in our own budget, we've made money
on the
deal.
The money gained from 'T'he Louisiana Refund' is expected to be
immediately
pumped into the rebuilding of Iraq.
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