This was posted the other day in a Caribbean travel group:

I have been a Travel Agent for thirty years in Washington, D.C.. Here
are examples why we might just be in BIG trouble!

A senior Senator called and had a question about the documents he needed
in order to fly to China. After a lengthy discussion about passports, I
reminded him that he needed a visa. "Oh, no I don't. I've been to China
many times and never had to have one of those." I double checked and
sure enough, his stay required a visa. When I told him this he said,
"Look, I've been to China four times and every time they have accepted
my American Express!"

I had a New Hampshire Congresswoman ask for an aisle seat, so that her
hair wouldn't get messed up by being near the window.

I got a call from a candidate's staffer, who wanted to go to Capetown. I
started to explain the length of the flight and the passport
information, then she interrupted me with, "I'm not trying to make you
look stupid, but Capetown is in Massachusetts." Without trying to make
her look like the stupid one, I calmly explained, "Cape Cod is in
Massachusetts, Capetown is in Africa." Her response (click).

A senior Vermont Congressman called, furious about a Florida package we
did. I asked what was wrong with his vacation in Orlando. He said he was
expecting an ocean-view room & he didn't have one. I tried to explain
That is not possible, since Orlando is in the middle of the state. He
replied, "Don't lie to me. I looked on the map, and Florida is a very
thin state!"

I got a call from a lawmaker's wife who asked, "Is it possible to see
England from Canada?" I said, "No." She said, "But they look so close on
the map."

An aide for a Bush cabinet member once called and asked if he could rent
a car in Dallas. When I pulled up the reservation, I noticed he had only
a 1-hour layover in Dallas. When I asked him why he wanted to rent a
car, he said, "I heard Dallas was a big airport, and we will need a car
to drive between the gates to save time."

An Illinois Congresswoman called last week. She needed to know how it
was possible that her flight from Detroit left at 8:20 a.m. and got into
Chicago at 8:33 am. I tried to explain that Michigan was an hour ahead
of Illinois, but she could not understand the concept of time zones.
Finally, I told her the plane went very fast, and she bought that!

A New York lawmaker called and asked, "Do airlines put your physical
description on luggage tags? I replied, "No, why do you ask?" She
replied, "Well, when I checked in with the airline, they put a tag on my
luggage that said (FAT), and I am overweight but I think that is very
rude!" After putting her on hold for a minute while I 'looked into it'
(I was actually laughing) I came back and explained the city code for
Fresno, CA is (FAT), and that the airline was just putting a destination
tag on her luggage.

A Senator's aide called to inquire about a trip package to Hawaii. After
going over all the cost info, she asked, "Would it be cheaper to fly to
California and then take the train to Hawaii?"

I just got off the phone with a freshman Congressman who asked, "How do
I know which plane to get on?" I asked him what exactly he meant, to
which he replied, "I was told my flight number is 823, but none of these
darn planes have numbers on them."

A lady Senator called and said, "I need to fly to Pepsi-Cola, FL. Do I
have to get on one of those little computer planes?" I asked if she
meant fly to Pensacola, FL on a commuter plane. She said, "Yeah,
whatever!"

A New Mexico Congresswoman called to make reservations, "I want to go
from Chicago to Rhino, New York." I was at a loss for words Finally, I
said, "Are you sure that's the name of the town?" "Yes, what flights do
you have?" replied the lady. After some searching, I came back with,
"I'm sorry, ma'am, I've looked up every airport code in the country and
can't find a Rhino anywhere." The lady retorted, "Oh, don't be silly!
Everyone knows where it is. Check your map!" I scoured a map of the
state of New York and finally offered, "You don't mean Buffalo, do you?"
"That's it! I knew it was a big animal," she replied.



--
Glenn Ashmore

I'm building a 45' cutter in strip/composite. Watch my progress (or lack
there of) at: http://www.rutuonline.com
Shameless Commercial Division: http://www.spade-anchor-us.com

"Cliff" wrote in message
...
[
I live in a semi-rural area. We recently had a new neighbor call the
local township administrative office to request the removal of the
Deer
Crossing sign on our road.
The reason: "too many deer were being hit by cars" and he didn't want
them to cross there anymore.


My daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered a taco.
She asked the person behind the counter for "minimal lettuce."
He said he was sorry, but they only had iceberg.


I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee
asked, "Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your
knowledge?"
To which I replied, "If it was without my knowledge, how would I
know?"
He smiled knowingly and nodded, "That's why we ask."


The stoplight on the corner buzzes when it's safe to cross the street.
I was crossing with an intellectually challenged coworker of mine when
she asked if I knew what the buzzer was for.
I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red.
Appalled, she responded, "What on earth are blind people doing
driving?!"


At a good-bye luncheon for an old and dear coworker who was leaving
the
company due to "downsizing," our manager commented cheerfully, "this
is
fun. We should do this more often." Not a word was spoken. We all just
looked at each other with that deer-in-the-headlights stare.


I work with an individual who plugged her power strip back into itself
and
for the life of her couldn't understand why her system would not turn
on.


When my husband and I arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up
our
car, we were told the keys had been locked! in it. We went to the
service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock
the
driver's side door.
As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door
handle and discovered that it was unlocked. "Hey," I announced to the
technician, "it's open!"
To which he replied, "I know - I already got that side."

They walk among us..............scary!!
]