"ben" wrote in message
. uk...
A bloke gets marooned on an Island with his faithful companion his dog and
a
sheep.
anyway nights go by where they are sitting by the shore and looking out at
the moon on the horizon and one night the bloke starts getting frisky and
looks at the sheep, the dog sees this and starts snarling, this go's on
for
a week, one night the bloke sees something bobbing on the horizon and
swims
out to see what it is, finds out its a woman and swims back to shore
clutching her around the waist.

That night he introduces her to their ritual of sitting at the shore and
as
the evening wears on the bloke starts getting realy frisky and turns to
the
woman and says...will you do me a real favour, he ask her...she says whats
that then...will you take the dog for a walk he replies.



A student from St' Andrews University had to do a survey across Scotland on
how many farmers actually did shag their sheep. Firstly she was sent off to
the Orkney islands where she found out that the farmers were well and truly
giving their sheep a good roggering when the fancy took them. The student
asked which technique they used to hold sheep in place while the deed was
done. They told her that they threw the sheep's front legs over the dyke so
they couldn't run off, and the farmer took them from behind.

The student was then sent off to the lowlands of central Scotland where she
found out that the farmers took their sheep from behind as well, but used a
differing technique from the highlands and islands farming folks. They used
the traditionally known one of placing the sheep's hind legs in the welly
boots so they could run away while the farmer roggered them from behind.

The final area the student visited was way down in the Scottish Borders
region. The farmers there were more than open about their sheep shagging
escapades, and they told to the student that the method they used was to
throw the sheep's front legs over their shoulders and take the take the
sheep in a sort of vertical missionary position against the wall of the
barn.

The student tells them that this is the first time she'd heard of the sheep
actually facing the farmer while the act was being done, and that in the
other regions of Scotland the farmers all preferred the rear entry
techniques. The Borders farmers all retorted "What? No Kissing?"