Today we had the first heating engineer in to quote for a new central
heating boiler. Naturally, we have been doing some research. So the
reality of this event was the cause of considerable wry amusement. Please
imagine sharp intakes of breath through clenched teeth at any and every
opportunity.

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HE: Why are you changing your boiler?
Us: Well, it is 17 years old. We don't want it to break down over the
winter. It won't go on forever.
HE: It might do. It could go on for years. I'm not really a very good
salesman.

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HE: Where were you thinking of having the boiler?
Us: We had been thinking of putting the boiler in this cupboard.
HE: Well, I'll put the boiler in the corner.
Us: But why can't we have it in the cupboard like we said?
HE: It's just not done like that these days. You always put it on an
outside wall. Check by looking at your neighbours.
Us: Well we can't actually see where the boilers are - only the flues!

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HE: Do you want the quote for the boiler in the cupboard or in the
corner.
Us: Well, which would be more expensive? Give us that one and we will
know the worst.
HE: Where I intend to put it (in the corner) of course. Because I need
to reroute all the pipework.
Us: Why can't I have it in the cupboard?
Because you'd need a flue across the wall. It would look awful.
Us: Can't we box it in?
HE: Well, yes, of course you can. But.... And you'd need a condensate
drain as well. Nasty things. Could have the pipe going across under your
window to the drain.

[No suggestion for burying or hiding this eyesore-to-be in the garden.]

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HE: Worcester-Bosch are known for combis. Yea, well, they do make some
other boilers now. But they're not really known for it. I could fit a
Baxi-Potterton or an Ideal. They're all the same really. I could fit a W-
B. They all cost the same.

[No way is a Poxi Batterton crossing our threshold!]

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[Observed that a ½" gaspipe comes through floor and feeds existing
boiler.]
Us: Is 15 mm enough the gas supply?
HE: Yes - it's enough if you don't have the combi.

[W-B literature appears to state that 12i & 24i boilers have 22mm
fittings and the supply pipe must NOT be smaller than that. This is
highly significant as the ½" gas pipe is buried in concrete and cannot
easily be replaced.]

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HE: Condensing are more expensive and unreliable. It's the, umm,
technology.

=====
HE (At every opportunity as an explanation for everything that might be
wrong, could be expensive or is uncertain. And probably why it had just
started to rain): Technology.

=====
HE: If you'd done this before the 1st of April you wouldn't have had to
have done this.


We are wondering what number two will be like...

--
Rod