A Woodworker took his old duck to the Veterinarian, concerned because the
duck wouldn't eat. The Vet explained to the man that as ducks age their
upper bills grow down over their lower bills, and make it difficult for the
animal to pick up it's food.

"What you need to do is gently file the upper bill down, even with the lower
bill. But you must be extra careful because the duck's nostrils are located
in the upper bill and if you file down too far, when the duck takes a drink
of water it'll drown."

The man goes about his business and about a week later the Vet runs into his
patient.

"Well, how is that duck of yours?" the Vet inquires.

"He's dead." declared the heartbroken man.

"I told you not to file his upper bill down too far! He took a drink of
water and drowned didn't he?" insisted the Vet.

"No." lamented the man. "I think he was dead before I took him out of the
vise."