I know this is a crap idea on paper but I am feeling supremely lazy and
i'm cash and time poor ATM, but want to crack on.

Has anyone laid lino over carpet? What was the outcome?

It's for upstairs at work, there's nobody trotting about in high heels,
just two blokes in trainers. If I rip the carpet up the floorboards will
probably be such that i'd need to put something over them to remove all
the lumps and bumps.