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Default Kindergartner Suspended for Playing with Stick

Caitlin Miller and several of her classmates were playing make-believe last week on the playground at McLauchlin Elementary School in North Carolina.

One of her friends was pretending to be a queen and another was pretending to be a princess. Caitlin was their protector. And in order to protect the Royals, she armed herself with a stick that resembled a gun.

Within a matter of minutes, the five-year-old was snatched up by a teacher and sent to the principals office €“ accused of a heinous offense.

She was promptly suspended for one day for €œturning a stick into a gun and threatening to shoot and kill other students.€

Brandy Miller, Caitlins mother, tells me she was floored by the punishment.

€œThe assistant principal told me Caitlin had a stick and she was using it to shoot and kill other students,€ she said.

The folks who run Hoke County Schools mistakenly believe that a stick can fire projectiles €“ like bullets.

€œAny student engaging in such behavior will be removed from the classroom or school environment for as long as is necessary to provide a safe and order environment for learning,€ the school district told television station WTVD.

Mrs. Miller said the entire incident has been blown way out of context.

€œThe school was really bothered because Caitlin was not worried about what she did,€ she said.

Thats because sweet innocent Caitlin seems to understand something that the grownups cannot comprehend €“ it was a freaking stick.

€œWe are a military family. My husband is an infantryman,€ she said. €œMy daughter understands the importance of gun safety. She understands the stick is not a real weapon.€

Mrs. Miller said she had to sit down with her daughter and explain why her make-believe fun was against school policy.

€œIt was gut-wrenching for me. Shes innocent. Shes young. She should be five and have fun,€ she said.

The branch-packing five-year-old served out her one day suspension and is back at school €“ a bit wiser to the lunacy of liberal educators.

Sadly, the slow-witted dunderheads who run Hoke County Schools honestly believe that a tree branch is just as deadly as an AR-15. When it comes to common sense, those North Carolina educators are firing blanks.