David Lang wrote:
Similes
Heard these recently which made me laugh;

"As full as a fat woman's sock"
"As welcome as a ginger stepson"
"It went down like a fat kid on a see saw".

Anyone got any more? :-)

a blind cobbler's thumb.

As in, 'he's hung like a ****in donkey that lad, he's got a knob like a
blind cobblers thumb'

twitching like a rabbits nose.

As in,' here we are at the Stade De Paris, four minutes to go, Portugal nil,
France nil and Ronaldo steps up to take a free kick, I bet his arse is
twitching like a rabbits nose'




not really similies....

when a fat girl goes past:
I'll bet she can part with a bonny turd

when someone does something stupid:
I don't think you could spell 'tit' backwards