On 04/07/2016 9:07 AM, Harold R wrote:
....

So she's not with the program.

The kids are 12 and 19.

They don't really have any "chores" per se.
....

The battle is lost almost irretrievably I'd wager altho perhaps the 12
yo may have some chance to modify behavior if the 19 yo is soon not
around off to school or on own.

We never let kids have all the cell phones and "stuff"; there's no
possibility they would ever be allowed to spend their days doing nothing
but video games and the like; chores were always expected from the time
were able to walk could carry a napkin to the table or something to
"help" (even if it ended up as more effort to assist than net work
gained, often).

As for yard work, and all, there was no "like" or "interest" needed;
again, it was expected.

One does not do them a service by not setting expectations and teaching
a work ethic, but if it's not begun early, patterns are set and then
become exceedingly difficult to break.

I feel your pain but the situation was built from the start...

--