And as far as the radiation goes you'd have to practically stick it in
your eye to get enough to do any harm.
We have this thing called the Underwriters Labaratory that tests all
household appliances.

That, and you also have the Federal Communications Comission, who wouldn't
allow such a device because of the possibility of unacceptable interference, as
well as the DHHS, who would deem such items as failing to comply with human
health protection codes in terms of radiation emission standards. In either
case, if DVDs and players were so dangerously radioactive, it would be
federally illegal to sell and possess them.

The original poster's story has more holes than Bonnie and Clyde in their last
getaway attempt. - Reinhart