On Wed, 18 Feb 2015 13:34:21 -0800, spuorgelgoog wrote:

Mmm. About the crumb tray that nobody's emptied lately...

Obviously the answer to that is a hose connecting the crumb tray to the
vacuum cleaner. Not only will this tidy the crumbs away but it will also
reduce the chances of the smoke detector working.

But what about the bird table...?