On Mon, 25 Mar 2013 08:48:40 -0700, pyotr filipivich
wrote:

Gunner Asch on Mon, 25 Mar 2013 01:28:55 -0700
typed in rec.crafts.metalworking the following:
On Sun, 24 Mar 2013 21:43:14 -0700, pyotr filipivich
wrote:

"Michael A. Terrell" on Sun, 24 Mar 2013
22:13:03 -0400 typed in rec.crafts.metalworking the following:
Larry Jaques wrote:
pyotr filipivich wrote:
Check Harbour Fright
Good luck with that, given their quality control. The first ten
pages of their micro black hole manual is filled with these:

CAUTION: SIZE OF BLACK HOLE MAY VARY FROM DIAGRAMS.

CAUTION: STRENGTH OF BLACK HOLE MAY VARY FROM LISTED STRENGTH.

CAUTION: DENSITY OF BLACK HOLE MAY VARY FROM SPECIFICATIONS.

CAUTION: COLOR OF BLACK HOLE MAY VARY.

CAUTION: DO NOT USE BLACK HOLE DURING STORMS.

CAUTION: DO NOT USE BLACK HOLE NEAR ELECTRICAL POWER LINES.

CAUTION: BLACK HOLE NOT FOR USE BY CHILD UNDER THE AGE OF 18.

CAUTION: BLACK HOLE NOT MADE IN CHINA.

CAUTION: BLACK HOLE MAY BE IMPERIAL, METRIC, OR WHITWORTH.

CAUTION: DO NOT USE BLACK HOLE FROM TOP OF LADDER.

CAUTION: DO NOT USE BLACK HOLE INDOORS.

CAUTION: DO NOT FEED BLACK HOLE AFTER MIDNIGHT.

CAUTION: DO NOT BOMBARD WITH MESONS

CAUTION: DO NOT SHOOT WITH PHOTON TORPEDOS

CAUTION: DO NOT SHOOT FROM PHOTON TORPEDOS

CAUTION: NOT TO BE TAKEN INTERNALLY

or for aging SNL fans:


Warning: Pregnant women, the elderly, and children under 10 should
avoid prolonged exposure to BLACK HOLE.

Caution: BLACK HOLE may suddenly accelerate to dangerous speeds.

BLACK HOLE contains a liquid core, which, if exposed due to rupture,
should not be touched, inhaled, or looked at.

Do not use BLACK HOLE on concrete.

Discontinue use of BLACK HOLE if any of the following occurs:
itching
vertigo
dizziness
tingling in extremities
loss of balance or coordination
slurred speech
temporary blindness
profuse sweating
heart palpitations

If BLACK HOLE begins to smoke, get away immediately. Seek shelter and
cover head.

BLACK HOLE may stick to certain types of skin.

When not in use, BLACK HOLE should be returned to its special
container and kept under refrigeration. Failure to do so relieves
the makers of BLACK HOLE, Wacky Products Incorporated, and its
parent company, Global Chemical Unlimited, of any and all
liability.

Ingredients of BLACK HOLE include an unknown glowing substance which
fell to Earth, presumably from outer space.

BLACK HOLE has been shipped to our troops in Saudi Arabia and is also
being dropped by our warplanes on Iraq.

Do not taunt BLACK HOLE.

BLACK HOLE comes with a lifetime guarantee.

Still legal in 16 states. Accept no substitutes.


--
pyotr filipivich
"With Age comes Wisdom. Although more often, Age travels alone."