Lieutenant Scott wrote:
On Wed, 14 Nov 2012 21:30:52 -0000, ARW
wrote:
Nthkentman wrote:
"ARW" wrote in message ...

Mrs Beattie wrote:
I was going to change a blown lightbulb in my living room, but
after reading the instructions on the fitting it says I must be
a qualified electrician.

Must I call in an electrician? It's quite dark in here now with
only my reading lamp. It makes knitting quite difficult.

If I can do it myself, how do I choose the right bulb? Is it
illegal to fit the old filament ones now? Do I have to get one
of them LED things to stop global warfare?

What about ladders? I was just going to stand on a small
chair, but apparently that isn't safe. I don't really want to
buy a stepladder (do I need to go on a course to use one?) just
for one bulb, but it might be cheaper than an electrician,
unless he's good looking of course, maybe I can answer the door
with not much on and get a discount.

:-) :-)

I'll give you a 50% discount if you are Scottish AND a red head.

However I am not prepared to say what you will be getting 50% of.

That'd make interesting reading in the local rag....

Retired Scottish redheaded widow dies after being impaled on an
inch of hot rod. It is suspected the 50% discount on the charge
she asked for was paid in kind and she dies from asphyxiation
during laughing so hard.

I would be happy to settle down with a Scottish red head.

They are tigers in bed.

Not just in bed:
"Researchers at the University of Louisville discovered that, on
average, people born with red hair require about 20 percent more
anaesthesia to obtain satisfactory sedation."
Trouble is when they get older you probably won't want them in bed:

The idea was that she would be 20 years younger than me.

--
Adam