Stormin Mormon wrote:
Virus Alert !!!!!!!!!!!!!!
If you receive an e-mail with a subject of Badtimes, delete it
immediately WITHOUT READING IT. This is the most DANGEROUS e-mail
virus ever.

It will rewrite your hard drive and scramble any disks that are even
close to your computer. It will recalibrate your freezer's coolness
setting so all your ice cream melts. It will demagnetize the strips
on all your credit cards, screw up the tracking on your VCR, and use
subspace field harmonics to render any CDs you try to play unreadable.

It will give your ex-boy/girlfriend/ex-husband/wife your new phone
number. It will mix antifreeze into your fishtank. It will drink all
your beer and leave its socks out on the coffee table when company
comes over. It will put a kitten in the back pocket of your good suit
and hide your car keys when you are late for work.

Badtimes will make you fall in love with a penguin. It will give you
nightmares about circus midgets. It will pour sugar in your gas tank
and shave off both your eyebrows while dating your current
boy/girlfriend behind your back and billing the dinner and hotel room
to your Visa card.

It moves your car randomly around parking lots so you can't find it.
It will tease your dog. It will leave strange messages on your boss's
voicemail in your voice. It is insidious and subtle. It is dangerous
and terrifying to behold. It is also a rather interesting shade of
mauve.

Badtimes will give you Dutch Elm disease. It will leave the toilet
seat up. It will make a batch of methamphetamine in your bathtub and
leave bacon cooking on the stove while it goes out to chase high
school kids with your snowblower.

These are just a few of the signs. Be very, very afraid!



You're beginning to sound like me. I bet we both eat the same breakfast
cereal.