On Tue, 01 Dec 2009 12:39:41 -0500, the infamous jeff_wisnia
scrawled the following:

Don Foreman wrote:

Mary is going to have lunch with her friend Jan tomorrow so I was
teasing her about her once again going out with her phancy phriends
for a posh lunch while leaving me to fend for myself. She said,
"there's a crust of stale bread for you on the counter."

"Yeah, I saw that. You sliced it on the bias in both directions;
what was once a loaf now looks like a wedge."

"My slices today were just fine."

"I'll bet. Good thing you don't do circumcisions! Your victim would
be peeing on the leg of the hapless gent next to him."

"I see nothing bad in that if they're democrats!"


Your lovely Mary might enjoy hearing about two signs I've seen in gent's
rooms.

1. Over a urinal, "The future of the human race is in your hands."

2. In a small restroom having only a sink and toilet, with a mirrored
wall above both, "Objects in mirror may be smaller than they look."

My favorite, when taking a leak in a Yuma, AZ gas station on my way
back to school in Phoenix: CAUTION TRUCKERS: Do not throw matchsticks
in the toilets. The crabs might learn how to polevault!

--
Some days, it's not even worth chewing through the restraints.