"SteveB" wrote in message
...

"Gerald Miller" wrote

One of the local merchants had their parking area re paved with mega
speed bumps. After a couple weeks they developed flat tops when they
were milled down to half height. I guess they got tired of having
modified junk piles removed when they got hung up.
Gerry :-)}
London, Canada

A local anal cranky old fart wanted for the city to put in speed bumps in
front of his house. He has owned this property forever, and about ten
years ago, they extended the road to a new park and ballfield complex.
So, now, he has a lot of people going past his house, all going too fast
for his taste, and some really speeding.

He petitioned the city to put speed bumps. They asked for citizen input.
I researched it, and notified the city of the findings:

Speed humps (that's what they're called) may not be placed on any street
that is the prime route for emergency vehicles in or out of a neighborhood
or venue like the park/ball field.
Speed humps cannot be placed on a road that has more of a grade than 7%.
Speed humps cannot be placed on a road or street that has higher than a
certain speed limit.
Speed humps cannot be placed on a street where curvature or undulation
would cause a hazard.
If a jurisdiction installs speed humps on a street or road that receives
federal funding, the funding may be denied in the future.
If a jurisdiction installs speed humps on a street, then any citizen has
the right to require that the same speed bumps be placed on their street.
A state traffic study of at least six months must be carried out to
justify the number of vehicles that use the road. This cost must be borne
by the city.

This fellow, we call him Mr. McGillicuddy, had even altered the street
signs to lower the speed limit, and on event nights, he would place those
A-framed sandwich boards on a public street telling people to slow down.
That backfired when a van went away from the edge of the road to give some
pedestrians some leeway, and ran over the sign, doing front end and tire
damage, which he had to pay for.

The pedestrians filed a complaint with the city saying that they must now
must do a survey to widen the street, install curb and gutters, and put in
an ADA compliant sidewalk on both sides of the street, about half a mile.

Needless to say, Mr. McGillicuddy has removed his signage, and has been
quiet for a long time now.

But on private property, just about anything goes.

Steve


We call 'em "Drunk-Bumps" here.