"Eigenvector" wrote in message
. ..
A couple three basic questions that I'm not willing to test myself.

When pigtailing wires together, you won't get shocked so long as 1) the
breaker to that circuit is off 2) you aren't touching both the neutral
AND the hot wire. Meaning, if I grab two hot wires and pig-tail them
(like when adding in a dimmer) I won't get shocked so long as I'm not
touching the neutral wire AND the breaker to that circuit is off. I'm not
trying to be ultra safe here so much as I'm trying to make sure that in
situation where switching off the breaker isn't a guarentee that power is
off for that fixture.

As long as the breaker is off, you can't get a shock. I always test for
voltage before touching a wire.
The neutral is just a really good ground; neither more dangerous than a
copper water pipe, nor less.
(The exception is when the neutral isn't attached to the breaker box
properly; then it can be dangerous, but that would be very unusual.)

Second question, if I take the probe leads from my volt meter and jam them
into an outlet, it's not gonna short the circuit but do exactly what I
would expect it to do - read the potential difference between the two
sockets in AC volts (assuming your voltmeter is reading AC volts).

That's correct. Just be sure you have the meter set correctly, or you might
be surprised.

And finally, when splicing phone line, do the wires normally carry voltage
sufficient to shock or could you essentially splice them with your teeth
if you had to?
Phone lines are harmless.