Hi!

A microwave with a USB port would be great. Then you could feed the
SPAM in directly.

I think Firewire would be better. :-)

weird sense of humorI once tried to stick a bunch of spam down a USB
cable, but all I got for my efforts was "a device attached to the USB
hub is drawing too much power". And when I put the microwave that close
to the computer, it pretty much obliberated the Wi-Fi signal. Which I
guess solved the problem, at least for a while./weird sense of humor

William