In message , Phil L
writes
ARWadsworth wrote:
"Phil L" wrote in message
. uk...
Lobster wrote:
http://uk.aldi.com/special_buys/productnl_3931.html
Just thought people would want to know....

David

The description is a jem...
Essential for all your baking, especially icing and dusting.

Couldn't have put it better myself.

Co-op dusters have "ideal for dusting" written on their packaging.


There was a bit of a phone-in/email -in on R2 about this today....someone
wrote in about a recorder that he'd bought his kid, it had a label on it
which said, 'this is a musical instrument and should only be used as such,
using it in any other manner may cause bodily harm' (obviously had
complaints form the pervert community)

Another one said (on the label of a cat bed) 'warm wash only, do not dry
clean, drip dry, remove pet before washing'

Okay, it's totally OT and I can't claim credit - it's off the web
somewhere), but apparently....




......Some examples of why the human race has probably evolved as far as
possible. These are actual instruction labels on consumer goods.

On Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. (but that's the only time
I have to work on my hair!)

On a bag of Fritos: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary.
Details inside. (The shoplifter special!)

On a bar of Dial soap: Directions: Use like regular soap. (and that
would be how?)

On some Swann frozen dinners: Serving suggestion: Defrost. (But it's
'just' a suggestion!)

On a hotel-provided shower cap in a box: Fits one head. (which one?)

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom of box): Do not turn
upside down. (Too late! You lose!)

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: Product will be hot after heating.
(Are you sure??? Let's experiment.)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron: Do not iron clothes on body. (But
wouldn't that save more time?) (Whose body?)

On Boot's Children's cough medicine: Do not drive car or operate
machinery. (We could do a lot to reduce the building site accidents if
we just kept those 5 year olds off those JCBs.)

On Nytol sleep aid: Warning: may cause drowsiness. (One would hope!)

On a Korean kitchen knife: Warning: Keep out of Children. (or pets!
What's for dinner?)

On a string of Chinese-made Christmas lights: For indoor or outdoor use
only. (As opposed to what.... use in outer space?)

On a Japanese food processor: Not to be used for the other use. (Now I'm
curious.)

On a Sunbeam Toaster: Do not use while bathing. (Makes for soggy toast.)

On Sainsbury's peanuts: Warning: contains nuts. (But no peas?)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts: Instructions: open packet, eat
nuts. (Have lobotomy)

On Costco's Kirkland brand Baby Wipes "Gentle enough for hands and
face". (Should be! think why you bought it)

On a matchbook cover where the sandpaper strip is on the back: For
safety, strike on back. (And my other choice is?)

On a Swedish chainsaw: Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or
genitals. (And while we're on this, your neck is not good at this,
either...)

On a Tot Tutors plastic "3 in 1" toy top table with chairs with photo of
table being used by two children: "Building blocks and child are not
included" (Ask any parent, it always costs more with kids)

On a child's Superman costume: Wearing of this garment does not enable
you to fly. (That's right, destroy a universal childhood belief)

- Anon
--
Someone