On Sun, 14 May 2006 10:59:58 GMT, Gunner
wrote:



When I was a kid, one summer I was pumping gas, and this blue haired
over done lady in this huge Caddy with tail fins and lots of chrome
came in for gas. As I was pumping and cleaning windows and checking
oil, I noticed this poodle was bouncing off the inside of the car,
mouth just a going. I remembered thinking that car was really really
sound proof, until I noticed her arm hanging out the window...

I asked about the dog, and in the sweetest grandmother tones..she said
" I love my little precious, but the little ******* was driving me
nuts with his barking so I had his vocal cords cut", then she smiled
sweetly, handed me her $5 for the 20 gallon fillup and then drove
off, leaving me standing next to the pump with my jaw hanging down and
the giggles starting to come on.

Gunner

A grandmother near and dear to me was messing around with seedlings,
dirt and little plastic trays in the kitchen sink yesterday. I
asked her if she hugged her plantlings and talked to them
encouragingly.

In a soft, dulcet maternal voice she sweetly murmurred,
"grow, you little sonofabitch!"

I'm glad I didn't have a mouthfull of coffee at the time.....